Are you afraid of having a child be on the spectrum?

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I would like to have a NT child. I don't want him/her to go through what I have experienced. Growing up was hellish

I'm not going to lie, i worry that they will have AS, which sounds awful i know but it is so so hard havig AS that i wouldn't want them to go through the same as me, however if they did have AS i could at least say i understood and do my best to make it as easy as possible for them.

i suppose i must be luckier than a lot of people on here, who are worried their children may be like them.

i struggled a bit at school socially (ok so sometimes i was completely miserable, but not all the time), but i still had a few friends. i did pretty well in subjects i enjoyed but i got bored and distracted easily when i wasn't interested. i was never any good at sports, but the one i did enjoy (horse riding) i still do. i finished school and did uni (leaving idiots behind at school and studying with other people who wanted to learn was so awesome!). met a nice guy, he's still around today. got a professional job. got a mortgage. started post grad and got a new professional job. quit post-grad, not interesting enough for the effort (though i am looking at a different postgrad degree now).

when you look at the bare bones of it, i didn't turn out too badly.

sure i did a few abnormal things. ocd hand washing. collecting everything in sight. disappointed my mum a bit when she thought my interest in nice material would lead to a fashion-interest daughter when really all it meant was i like nice feeling fabric

when i told mum that i thought i was AS, first offf she was a bit offended. she had worked disability and child care for a long time, and she said "don't you think i would have noticed?". later when i mentioned i was worried about having a child like me, she pointed out that i hadn't turned out too badly anyway

must we always focus on the negative?

i'm more worried about having a child that is worse, more shut off. i met a little boy who was much further down the spectrum than i would be. he came over and st next next to me on a park bench at the dog park and gave my dogs new names. he was beautiful. a little boy i used to work with at childcare when i was in highschool was more shut off, you needed to leave him be with his cars quite bit of the time. i'm sure he was a lot of work for his parents, but he was still a great kid.

what i worry about most (and a lot of parents of disabled kids are) is what happens to them when the child outlives the parent, an they can't be there anymore

In some ways I'd love my children to not be uncomfortable around people and to fit in and have lots of friends. But in other ways I would want to know how my children think and what they need and why.

Honestly, I am a little afraid that I will have a child with AS because I don't want them to have to deal with the teasing, rejection, and difficulties that I have gone through. But I would still love a child with AS just as much as I would love a NT child, and maybe if my child had AS, they might not have to go through as many difficulties as I did because by the time I have kids, the world will hopefully accept people with AS more.

Go a head abor me all you please because I would have been more grateful for both myself and for my own children to have been Nt so screw your opinion. AspieRouge. Leauge_Girl or anyone else that won't agree with me. There is a major lack of funding for all people on the HFA spectrum threw private agencies and I was misdiagnosed for a large majority of my life span until a year and a half ago out out today. I'm replying to this post out of my past experience with our society and the large budget cuts all over the world besides the bay area where I live in. And had to go threw that painful process of being sterilized just to stop the spread of autism. It beats getting an abortion done any day of the week. I'm well aware of this either being in the norm of T.M.I. or NSW or whatever else you may call it. But your forgetting the fact that most if not all Aspies feel like lower functioning individuals whom are shunned upon by our own societies threw history as well as the media. This discouragement only makes all people HFA still less understood and even feel worse about themselves. And how most families feel that have special needed children. THERE THE WORST.

It's clear to me that those Aspie women ITT who wish to have children who are NT(and thus not like them) have serious issues with self-loathing. I wonder if it's due their social conditioning and being more sensitive to disapproval from others. I mean, they view their OWN condition as a bad thing as opposed to being part of who they are(as I do). How pathetic is that???
Isn't it interesting that the few aspie men who posted ITT say they'd rather have a kid who is like them(aspie).......I honestly wonder why.