so, who are these creepy men

Page 4 of 5 [ 70 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Next

Previous topic | Next topic

blue_bean
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,617
Location: Behind the wheel

15 Mar 2013, 7:20 am

LKL wrote:

Teh poor, poor menz.
(/sarcasm)

edit: I guess I should explain further than that.
Women, in general, aren't going to feel sorry for men whose greatest fear is going being called a name which might or might not be valid, because women's fear is being sexually assaulted or killed.
Violence is worse than name calling. Ok? Even if the name calling is undeserved. The persistent inability of so many men to understand that very simple point makes me wish I had even a slight inclination to be a lesbian.

Risk = chance of outcome x badness level of outcome.
Men have a slightly higher chance of being called a 'creep' than women have of being raped (although odds are that somewhere between 1 in 3 and 1 in 5 women will be raped in her lifetime), but the badness level of 'rape' so far exceeds that of 'name calling' that women's risk vastly outweighs men's in this instance.

I do personally agree that a woman's personal safety is more important than a man's feelings when it comes to poorly planned sexual approaches. What some men seem to not realize is that the women they're approaching might already be victims of rape, hence their overprotective response. At the end of the day people merely respond to what they perceive, and it's past experience that colours those perceptions. I also see the catch 22 women face when dealing with things like this; damned if we're not looking after our safety enough, damned if we do because men then take offense at our vigilance.

I've never used the word creep to describe a guy before to be honest. Probably because I've learned enough to have insight into the reasons for their behavior (AS, poor social skills, mentally ill, maybe even MR). If worst comes to worst and he can't take a hint I'd rather call them an offensive term related to their evident mental deficiency at realizing said cues.

Cuckooflower
Deinonychus

Joined: 4 Oct 2012
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 348

21 Mar 2013, 5:28 pm

League_Girl wrote:

When I was meeting men from online, we all had a thing with diapers but one of them was creepy. He acted all sexual about it because he wanted me to rub his diapered crotch and wanted to do the same to me and keep on doing it. It was all creepy. I never saw that creep again. Plus online after I got married he kept talking about wanting to have sex with me and he knew I was married and he wanted my husband in bed with us. I blocked him online.

Good God!!

That's pretty far-out!

_________________
Dime quienes son tus amigos y te diré quien eres

Cafeaulait
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Jul 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,539
Location: Europe

21 Mar 2013, 7:34 pm

These kind of men. Creepy. Especially when they follow you on the streets.

pokerface
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Apr 2011
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 921
Location: The Netherlands

21 Mar 2013, 7:39 pm

Cafeaulait wrote:

These kind of men. Creepy. Especially when they follow you on the streets.

I don't think this buy is creepy.
He has a silly expression on his face but on the whole he's quite good looking. The tattoo's are a bit much though.

Tyri0n
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,879
Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)

21 Mar 2013, 10:46 pm

I called a guy creepy the other day, and my female friend at first denied it; then, nodded in agreement and said "well he's not that way after you get to know him, but yes, that's how most people see him."

Someone who acts very intense but is also mousey and socially awkward. It's either that mousey demeanor, slumping body language, or a very intense focus that seems to drive women off in my experience.

Well, but maybe that's just one girl's opinion. What do y'all think?

Tyri0n
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,879
Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)

21 Mar 2013, 10:50 pm

mds_02 wrote:

None of the men, not a single one, who are complaining about that word have said that it never applies.

All of them have tried to make the point that it is used too often. Not that women should stop using it, but that they should not use it to describe every single guy they happen to not like.

Is that really such a difficult thing to understand?

"Hey, some guys commit rape. That's why it's okay for me to publically label a guy as dangerous because he *gasp, shudder* said hello, or asked me what time it was, or did any of a hundred other completely innocuous things."

That is how your argument is coming across.

Also...

LKL wrote:

No, I don't. What I wonder is why, or how, so many men take themselves and their relatively little problems so f***ing seriously.

Do men need to give a big detailed list of all the sh** that's happened to them before you're willing to take them seriously? Would you like mine? Probably not. Suffice it to say that most of the stuff women seem to be afraid of, when they defend the use of that term, has happened to me. And guess what, I still think it's an overused and hurtful (not to mention seriously damaging to the reputation) word.

I don't think women should have to use it less. They can't control how they feel about someone after all. I do think it would be helpful if women would generally be more specific about what they mean by "creepy," particularly when they're talking around other guys who are not past hope. It would be very helpful to some of us if women would be more specific (actually, that goes to NT's referring to "bad social skills too").

Going out with female friends a few years ago and watching them talk about guys, I think I conditioned my mind to believe that asking a woman out is always creepy behavior. So I have never done it. When women hurl vague terms around like this, without explaining them, you condition nice guys who may have nothing to worry about to be anxious around women.

Cafeaulait
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Jul 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,539
Location: Europe

22 Mar 2013, 3:26 am

pokerface wrote:

Cafeaulait wrote:

These kind of men. Creepy. Especially when they follow you on the streets.

I don't think this buy is creepy.
He has a silly expression on his face but on the whole he's quite good looking. The tattoo's are a bit much though.

I think he is very creepy. It´s not about the physical appearance per se but the type of guy. Just cannot stand this type of guy making comments like ´ey girll, pssssssst´ ´yo whaddup doll´. Things like that.

Cafeaulait
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Jul 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,539
Location: Europe

22 Mar 2013, 3:33 am

Tyri0n wrote:

I called a guy creepy the other day, and my female friend at first denied it; then, nodded in agreement and said "well he's not that way after you get to know him, but yes, that's how most people see him."

Someone who acts very intense but is also mousey and socially awkward. It's either that mousey demeanor, slumping body language, or a very intense focus that seems to drive women off in my experience.
Well, but maybe that's just one girl's opinion. What do y'all think?

I think I am the female version of what you have described.

Tyri0n
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,879
Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)

22 Mar 2013, 8:40 am

Cafeaulait wrote:

Tyri0n wrote:

I called a guy creepy the other day, and my female friend at first denied it; then, nodded in agreement and said "well he's not that way after you get to know him, but yes, that's how most people see him."

Someone who acts very intense but is also mousey and socially awkward. It's either that mousey demeanor, slumping body language, or a very intense focus that seems to drive women off in my experience.
Well, but maybe that's just one girl's opinion. What do y'all think?

I think I am the female version of what you have described.

I don't think you stare intently, especially at people, if you're that self-aware, at least not like creepy guys do.

That's kinda what I mean by "intense" -- someone who doesn't move their head or eyes much and either stares off into space without making eye contact or else stares right at people without blinking. That's scary + creepy imho and at least my friend's opinion too.

Wandering_Stranger
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Apr 2012
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,261

22 Mar 2013, 9:48 am

I ave encountered a creepy man lately. After being told 3 times to leave me alone, he seems to have disappeared completely. The only issue now is that I keep getting asked if I know where he is. I don't and I really don't care what's happened to him, if I'm honest.

pokerface
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 21 Apr 2011
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 921
Location: The Netherlands

22 Mar 2013, 11:15 am

He obvously took notice of the fact you told him to leave you alone since he has disappeared. A real creep wouldn't do that.

mercifullyfree
Deinonychus

Joined: 21 Dec 2012
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 362
Location: internet

22 Mar 2013, 1:38 pm

Tyri0n wrote:

....Someone who acts very intense but is also mousey and socially awkward. It's either that mousey demeanor, slumping body language, or a very intense focus...

....someone who doesn't move their head or eyes much and either stares off into space without making eye contact or else stares right at people without blinking. That's scary + creepy imho and at least my friend's opinion too...

Argh! Aside from the not moving head and eyes (I'm all over the place when I'm jittering), this is me. I am a girlcreep! Been told I am massively obvious staring at a guy I like the look of too.

Kookygirl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 30 Jun 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 165
Location: Wales, UK.

23 Mar 2013, 5:37 am

I think the reason that aspie women are more prone to these creeps is that our body language sets us apart from other women, maybe being more shy and less likely to retaliate or humiliate them. I suppose we give their ego a boost, especially if they embarrass us in front of their friends.

_________________
If I agreed with you then we'd both be wrong!

When in doubt........mumble.

Tyri0n
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,879
Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)

23 Mar 2013, 8:47 am

mercifullyfree wrote:

Tyri0n wrote:

Argh! Aside from the not moving head and eyes (I'm all over the place when I'm jittering), this is me. I am a girlcreep! Been told I am massively obvious staring at a guy I like the look of too.

Sorry! I don't think you're actually creepy.

Cuckooflower
Deinonychus

Joined: 4 Oct 2012
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 348

23 Mar 2013, 11:11 am

Cafeaulait wrote:

These kind of men. Creepy. Especially when they follow you on the streets.

This guy is sexy in one sense (he is physicaly attractive, regardless of inner intentions), but I can see how he could be creepy in manner. Or, ''creepy'' is not the word I would use. Maybe scary, or harassing, or annoying, or intrusive.

To me, creepy is when I find a man physically repugnant on top of his behaviour being predatory. And when he is going for women well below his age, and has a nasty manner as well.
Sometimes young guys can just be vulgar, without necessarily being creepy.

I don't know.

_________________
Dime quienes son tus amigos y te diré quien eres

Cuckooflower
Deinonychus

Joined: 4 Oct 2012
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 348

23 Mar 2013, 11:12 am

Kookygirl wrote:

Yes, this seems to be the case.

It's a shame.

_________________
Dime quienes son tus amigos y te diré quien eres

Page 4 of 5 [ 70 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Next

Jump to:

so, who are these creepy men Post Reply New Topic

so, who are these creepy men