Being friends with other women.

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My friendships with other girls (especially one in particular- the 'alpha female') usually boiled down to one thing - whether we were 'best forever friends' or not. If we weren't, I was ostracized from the group, maybe for up to a couple of weeks, in which case I would relent and be let back into the fold. It's not nice being on the outside, and my god, girls can be mean.

Of course, not all women are like that, but the most I’ve met were sure as hell never genuine. Beyond common courtesy, they just tended to be a bit fake. And I don’t understand why women talk behind each other’s backs, snipe at one another and make such a big deal out of the stupidest things. You hate me so much that you just can’t stop talking about me? Now if I were a man that would be considered the complete opposite. ‘There’s a fine line…’ and all that.

Even if I wanted, I could not make friends with women my age. It is stupid really but it boils down to the fact that I look very young for my age and women between 30 and 40 seem to be very self-conscious of how they look. They simply hate me.
Which is sad, really.

wow, yeah.
you can't say to a woman "will you just stop being a jerk?"

except when someone's lied - no one owns up. there seems to be this social code that it's not ok to point out when someone's lied. instead of explaining what led them to, they will keep lying and then accuse you of accusing them of lying. how are you ever supposed to trust anyone who does this? but i think a lot of people do this, male and female.

I don't have any close female friends either. I just can't seem to connect with them. Either we have completely different interests or lifestyles because of income or what I like they don't. I think I miss social cues. It seems when I listen in on a group of ladies talking, it is so BORING! I'd rather listen to the guys; they talk about interesting things like fishing, hunting, or their newest gun.

Best friend is female. Alot of my other friends have been guys. Overall about 50/50.

Why NTs are discriminatory? Because they are discriminatory by nature.
and they look at everybody else potential competitor or enemy if they are not in the same group.
People including Aspies most likely only want to be friends with someone that are profitable in some ways. Friendships in my idea were supposed to be based on things like love, trust and common interest. But most NTs care about things like fame, status, money, etc. they think of the social benefit and profit that they can gain from being friend with that particular individual.

therefore, they have every right or reason to discriminate Aspies unless it benefits them in some way. and there is very little Aspies have that they want.
There is very little reason for most NTs to like Aspies just because aspies are knowledgeable. Most NTs probably do not even appreciate that aspect of aspies for the most part. even though I am making a huge generalisation. They do not like people who are too smart or smarter than them. they like people who can worship them and look after them. so they feel smarter.
If NTs think of you as someone smarter than them or have potential to be smarter in some ways, they would not only discriminate you but bully you and potentially torture or kill you.

As an aspie woman, I do appreciate smart people. I’d like to associate myself from people who are much smarter than me about life, people and everything else in between.
But NTs look at a lot of people as competition, not as true friendship material. Is it possible to gain acceptance from NTs? I think it takes a while and many trials to be accepted but do I think it’s worthwhile? I think It’s necessary if you’d like to survive and rise in status in society. But Do I honestly Think of most NTs as my true friendship materials? I don’t think so. that would be actually far from the truth. NTs are enjoyable for the time being. But if you are talking about true friendship based on non-compromising values, I believe Aspies are much safer bet.
I have been let down by NTs way too much times in my lifetime to give it another try. They also know “instinctively” when someone is not like them. It’s almost like an animal instinct.


and To continue this talk on females, Yes Women are cruel. a lot more cruel than men.
You know some animal or insect species that attack other females in order to prevent them from mating? that’s what comes to my mind when I think of NTs.
NTs are extremely protective of ones in their circle though. and they are extremely protective of their “off-springs”. Most likely these are the things they live for, the continuation of their kind and their species. Not how to improve the world or betterment of mankind in general. so you can say their whole existence is for selfish reasons. and that explains their selfish natures.
If two individuals are completely motivated by different reasons, I can't see how those two individuals can share the common ground and become the "best friends"

Almost all my friends are female. The only guy friend I have is my secret crush. Anyway, I don't have anything in common to be friends with boys. The guy friends I did have never returned phone calls or if the did it would be a week later, most guy friends I've had only like to joke or not talk and just sit and talk about absoutly nothing. I mean I've had a couple guy friends but not a lot. Also i can't beleive teh stero-types of women in this thread. I know boys who are just as catty and mean as Girls. Anyway, most of my female friends are in the same classes as me and we have study groups and stuff. We don't just talk about make up and boys. Also most of my guy friends are just so immature, actaully I help teach at an ESL center and I have to always be on the boys to do their homework and they always forget it. I mean girls do that too, but it seems it happens more with boys and a lot of times they just don't pay attention. I mean I know Im genaralizing and girls can be like this too. Just some things I have noticed.

I feel exactly the same. I've tried to make friends with other women and came to the conclusion some time ago that it's just not going to happen. I used to let it get to me, but I'm actually ok with it now.

I think there is an expectation in society for women to be social and have a large circle of friends and that used to make me feel like some kind of freak. I wonder if sometimes I wanted friends not so much for friendship's sake, but just so I could feel 'normal'. Eh...normal is overrated anyway. I'm perfectly happy spending time with my husband, children, and pets.

I have no friends.

I haven't had friends since my late teens when I was ousted from the group of females that I was friends with.

I have not been able to make new friends since. I find it difficult to connect with women. I don't like to gossip. Doing it makes me feel awful because I can't stop thinking that if I was the subject of the gossip I wouldn't like it, so I tend to steer clear. I'm very private, so the few times I've been in relationships,they just weren't up for discussion. I don't like going to clubs and bars and meeting and obtaining men has never been a priority for me.

With men I can get along better, but being friends with men has put me in danger in the past. Like a male that I thought was my friend once said to me "No straight man wants to be just friends with you."

And he has been right so far.

I have one really close female friend now, and I have to say, she is a lot like me. We get each other's quirks, and it's one of the things we can talk about. LOL!

I don't have any friends currently, but most of my friends have always been male. I understand their behavior, a lot better than I do females. Females don't seem to get it, that I could care less about shoes, styles, "oh, did you hear what so and so did?" And it never seems to stop. I can't keep up with the pace of the conversation, much less understand what they're talking about. Hanging out with guys is less stressful, because you can just sit, watch t.v. or do whatever, and not get asked if somethings wrong, for not spending the last half hour talking about a million things at once. Plus, I'm no good at listening, or giving advice to women, because I don't tell them what they WANT TO HEAR, I tell them the TRUTH, which usually doesn't go over very well. I'm not saying it's like this hanging out with all women, because I have a female friend who I've known since grade school, who's awesome, but I think my description applies to the majority.

Maybe I've just lucked out but my female friends have been much smarter than my male friends. In general my female friends have always been better people than my male friends.

You must have. Because I've seldom been able to form solid friendships with women. At best, they just decide I'm to weird for their group, but most of the time, they let me know I'm unwelcome by using catty tactics.

I had few female friends growing up, but in adulthood I have had even fewer. I suppose there is one female that I could now call a friend; however, most of her other friends are male as well so it sort of make sense why we would get along. I am not girly at all, and I do not like to do girly things. I have more in common with males, and they, also, tend not to notice or care how strange I am. I appear even more strange and awkward in situations where I have little to nothing in common with the other people so I come off as more awkward and weird around females.