I was diagnosed in 2001 at around my mid-late 20's after my body and mind started deteriorating and was kicked out of a home and left to die in the hospital a week before Christmas. Before that I was diagnosed with "schizophrenia form disorder with learning disability" at around 13, but no one really believed I had schizophrenia including me. They did however, think I was behaviorally dysfunctional and blamed my parents, who raised my brother and me in a non-violent and very functional household, for allowing me to get away with bad behavior I hardly ever displayed when I was still living with them! I was moved from one home to another every few months at least, having to cope with new staff and share houses or even rooms with people with chronic schizophrenia and OCD, how could I NOT lose it at some point??? They were always switching us around, and when one staff member I really liked and was like a big sister to me left and I never saw her again, that's when I really got bad. I wish I could sue the people who ran those homes for the hell I was put through, but NO! Not even a written apology, everything was and is STILL all my fault.
The summers I spent in the homes were the worst. I'd be in and out of the hospital constantly, and the doctors would make me take all these new drugs that messed me up so badly I couldn't eat or sleep or think or sit still. Every day was pure hell and I hate them all because of that
And I hate the summer because it reminds me so much of that. I know it's all in the past, but...