How do men do it?
Are divorce rates actually that high? If so, I wonder how same sex and heterosexual divorce rates differ. I don't know. I'm just skeptical of the idea that men and women genuinely dislike each other on some deep level.
in america they are that high. and among gay couples it is even higher, last i checked. it is that people in general have a hard time learning how to truly meld with another human, all the differences get in the way. that is why kate hepburn said what she did about how men and women weren't well-suited for one another, that it'd be better if they dropped in on each other now and then.
Wait a minute...if the divorce rate of gay couples is higher than that hetero couples then that kinda refutes what Hepburn said. It would mean that folks of the same sex are even worse suited to each other than those of the opposite sex.
auntblabby
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Are divorce rates actually that high? If so, I wonder how same sex and heterosexual divorce rates differ. I don't know. I'm just skeptical of the idea that men and women genuinely dislike each other on some deep level.
in america they are that high. and among gay couples it is even higher, last i checked. it is that people in general have a hard time learning how to truly meld with another human, all the differences get in the way. that is why kate hepburn said what she did about how men and women weren't well-suited for one another, that it'd be better if they dropped in on each other now and then.
Wait a minute...if the divorce rate of gay couples is higher than that hetero couples then that kinda refutes what Hepburn said. It would mean that folks of the same sex are even worse suited to each other than those of the opposite sex.
BINGO!! what she should have said is that PEOPLE are generally not so well suited for EACH OTHER.
I believe people can be well-suited for one another. If they're the right two people. A rare thing.
It's a miracle people get along as it is. It's a massive compromise, living with somebody. You can feel powerless. I like my own space. I need to feel some control. I can totally understand people, who need their own space too. The high divorce rates. I think that's because it was never based on anything substantial. Alot of marriages are just lust. Lust wear off , and after a few years. If personalities are not really compatible. That's when it crumbles. (So says science. And personal observation.)
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I believe people can be well-suited for one another. If they're the right two people. A rare thing.
It's a miracle people get along as it is. It's a massive compromise, living with somebody. You can feel powerless. I like my own space. I need to feel some control. I can totally understand people, who need their own space too. The high divorce rates. I think that's because it was never based on anything substantial. Alot of marriages are just lust. Lust wear off , and after a few years. If personalities are not really compatible. That's when it crumbles. (So says science. And personal observation.)
it is just as hard to find a truly compatible person, as it is to shoot a bullet at another bullet headed towards the first bullet.
Ah testosterone. He's beginning to 'act like a man' Don Corleone would be proud...I guess when his 'sonny' got killed, Don Corleone had a sudden testosterone drop...cause he cried like a baby, if I remember....
Yeah, I think loss of relatives is one acceptable time to cry.
Cynicism vs. Idealism. If you're right, then that makes life a little more grim than it needs to be.
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auntblabby
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firstly, even when i had plenty of testosterone as a young man, i still was emotional and could cry sentimental tears or ones of anguish. a right-brained man is prone to that more than a left-brained man. and perhaps i could have prefaced my bullet statement with "for people like me,".....
Does your friend attribute the reduced crying to the testosterone, to the fact that he feels more in sync with his new biological/physical composition, the idea that "men don't cry," or what?
Are divorce rates actually that high? If so, I wonder how same sex and heterosexual divorce rates differ. I don't know. I'm just skeptical of the idea that men and women genuinely dislike each other on some deep level.
in america they are that high. and among gay couples it is even higher, last i checked. it is that people in general have a hard time learning how to truly meld with another human, all the differences get in the way. that is why kate hepburn said what she did about how men and women weren't well-suited for on another, that it'd be better if they dropped in one each other now and then.
I had an uncle that drove to town every Saturday evening at the same time. You could set your watch by him. He would go spent the night with Aunt Buck (female) and got back after Sunday church with a hangover. The only time he lived apart from his parents was during his army service and trade school. Moved to town into a sr care at 88 and died at 94. I think this would be the perfect set-up for me. Well, except for the hangover part.
pardon me sir, but i have a few questions for you if you don't mind... what did your uncle do after his folks passed away? i don't mean to suggest anything untoward but what did he do when he spent the saturday night with aunt buck?
He moved into a senior care home and hated it. He got drunk and laid.
I believe people can be well-suited for one another. If they're the right two people. A rare thing.
It's a miracle people get along as it is. It's a massive compromise, living with somebody. You can feel powerless. I like my own space. I need to feel some control. I can totally understand people, who need their own space too. The high divorce rates. I think that's because it was never based on anything substantial. Alot of marriages are just lust. Lust wear off , and after a few years. If personalities are not really compatible. That's when it crumbles. (So says science. And personal observation.)
Another romantic as I believe you are correct. The times have changed and marriage has become a business deal. I still think there is someone out there for me, a soul mate. I'll keep looking or die.
Managed 13 yrs, with plans for the road onto the end of our lives . At 7 years the newness wore off.. talked extensively for about a week. Then he set himself a office in a structure that we had bought and built on the property , with extra storage capacity’s . Managed the rest of our time together quite well through thick and thin.
Till his demise. We were both raised with much older values than current generations .. Just
Wanted to say .. Love can last. , just hard to find these days . Love can move from Eros to agape … in ones lifetime.
Best wishes in your search .
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auntblabby
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Till his demise. We were both raised with much older values than current generations .. Just
Wanted to say .. Love can last. , just hard to find these days . Love can move from Eros to agape … in ones lifetime.
Best wishes in your search .
Great post Jakki
Maybe the better question is: if it didn't last, was it love?
Does your friend attribute the reduced crying to the testosterone, to the fact that he feels more in sync with his new biological/physical composition, the idea that "men don't cry," or what?
Not sure. He seemed a bit PO'd by it in fact- said something along the lines of "when this kind of thing happened before, I'd cry and feel better afterwards, but now I can't seem to do that." (He's not particularly "macho" as a man.)
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