Female authority figures dont take to me very well

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Ai_Ling
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15 Jul 2011, 3:49 pm

I've noticed that female authority figures seem to have a problem with me. If they seem bitchy, I gotta avoid them as much as possible. If their nice, they're approachable but they still dont respond to me very well at times. I dont seem to have this problem with male authority figures. Id take a mean male authority over mean female authority any day. I seldom have problems with male authority. This true for anyone else?



YellowBanana
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15 Jul 2011, 3:59 pm

I hadn't thought about this before, but yes - I seem to have a lot of problems with female authority figures responding to me badly. I don't know why. It doesn't seem to happen with male authority figures.


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15 Jul 2011, 4:30 pm

women are the choosers to who gets to reproduce its part of evolution? not sure here



Jayo
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15 Jul 2011, 5:26 pm

Oh Hell Ya!! ! 8O I've had problems with 3 different female authority figures, in the workplace, and I believe the root of the problem is that women in authority tend to have a sensory-perceptive personality, whereas Aspie males like myself are more rigidly analytical and rationalizing. So they're like 180 degrees apart from an Aspie, and THEY DO JUDGE and take an acrimonious stance toward the Aspie. I had to deal with belittling comments, ostracizing, snubs, passive-aggressive behaviour etc from the b****es in authority from my past. I'm no expert at reading between the lines, but they definitely said "I don't like your kind" without actually saying "I don't like your kind". :x



Rhiannon0828
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15 Jul 2011, 5:27 pm

Ai_Ling wrote:
I've noticed that female authority figures seem to have a problem with me. If they seem bitchy, I gotta avoid them as much as possible. If their nice, they're approachable but they still dont respond to me very well at times. I dont seem to have this problem with male authority figures. Id take a mean male authority over mean female authority any day. I seldom have problems with male authority. This true for anyone else?


I very much have this problem. In fact, that's the reason I lost my last job. Most women seem to dislike me. The women I get along with are the ones that say they don't much like other women and that other women don't like them. :roll: How to fix this? I'm still searching for that answer too. So I can commiserate, but I 'm afraid I don't have any solutions. Let me know if you come up with one! :)



Rhiannon0828
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15 Jul 2011, 5:32 pm

Jayo wrote:
Oh Hell Ya!! ! 8O I've had problems with 3 different female authority figures, in the workplace, and I believe the root of the problem is that women in authority tend to have a sensory-perceptive personality, whereas Aspie males like myself are more rigidly analytical and rationalizing. So they're like 180 degrees apart from an Aspie, and THEY DO JUDGE and take an acrimonious stance toward the Aspie. I had to deal with belittling comments, ostracizing, snubs, passive-aggressive behaviour etc from the b****es in authority from my past. I'm no expert at reading between the lines, but they definitely said "I don't like your kind" without actually saying "I don't like your kind". :x


Don't feel alone, brother. :evil:



Jayo
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15 Jul 2011, 6:13 pm

Rhiannon0828 wrote:
Ai_Ling wrote:
I've noticed that female authority figures seem to have a problem with me. If they seem bitchy, I gotta avoid them as much as possible. If their nice, they're approachable but they still dont respond to me very well at times. I dont seem to have this problem with male authority figures. Id take a mean male authority over mean female authority any day. I seldom have problems with male authority. This true for anyone else?


I very much have this problem. In fact, that's the reason I lost my last job. Most women seem to dislike me. The women I get along with are the ones that say they don't much like other women and that other women don't like them. :roll: How to fix this? I'm still searching for that answer too. So I can commiserate, but I 'm afraid I don't have any solutions. Let me know if you come up with one! :)


Geez, I'm sorry to hear you got fired over the pettiness. Sometimes I wonder if telling one of the by*****s that you had Asperger Syndrome and explained it, would it make a difference, and I'm inclined to say no. They'd probably make a flippant retort like "well, then you clearly need to deal with that" (translation: "that's your problem, not mine" :evil: )



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15 Jul 2011, 7:34 pm

I don't have more problems with female than male authority figures - just authority, in general, that is not qualified to be in authority (ie, if you aren't smarter than me, don't know the job better than me, or at least are older than me, I'm not going to pay a whole hell of a lot of attention to you as more than a co-worker), which is equal-opportunity.



Iloveshoujoai
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16 Jul 2011, 1:29 am

Not me, I love it when a woman takes charge. *swoons* :)



Lahmacun
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16 Jul 2011, 3:29 pm

I have had trouble with female authority figures in the past, and I am female myself. I did notice that the trouble I had with them was in situations where the department was entirely staffed by females. I've gotten along better in environments where both men and women work together. At this point in my "career" (if you can call a zillion false starts a career), I would avoid, completely, working in an all-female department. I have seen too many situations of females replicating the "mean girl" type of ostracizing, passive-aggressiveness, and overtly bullying behavior to be interested in taking it on again.



hyperlexian
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16 Jul 2011, 4:43 pm

LKL wrote:
I don't have more problems with female than male authority figures - just authority, in general, that is not qualified to be in authority (ie, if you aren't smarter than me, don't know the job better than me, or at least are older than me, I'm not going to pay a whole hell of a lot of attention to you as more than a co-worker), which is equal-opportunity.

^this. i'd say that overall i've been mistreated or misunderstood in different ways by male vs. female managers, but both genders can suck about equally. female managers have sometimes been kind of moody or easy to anger, whereas some male managers were dismissive and sexist.

part of the problem for employees is the attitude they bring to the table. i have worked in management. i noticed that some female employees like to play up their attractivess or cuteness, and i found that intolerable, whereas a male manager may have responded positively (which would make a female employee hate me and yet love a male manager). some male employees have their own ways of being intolerable, like coveting my job and going for my throat in every way imaginable.

point is, both managers and employees can be difficult to work with, in both genders. it just may be for different reasons sometimes.


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Chronos
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17 Jul 2011, 9:44 pm

Ai_Ling wrote:
I've noticed that female authority figures seem to have a problem with me. If they seem bitchy, I gotta avoid them as much as possible. If their nice, they're approachable but they still dont respond to me very well at times. I dont seem to have this problem with male authority figures. Id take a mean male authority over mean female authority any day. I seldom have problems with male authority. This true for anyone else?


I've noticed men and women socially differently and in hierarchy environments the dynamics tends to be different depending on the sex of the person in charge, at least to some degree.

I've noticed in general, that women in positions of authority were less likely to be pragmatic and more likely to be passive aggressive, but they were more likely to express empathy for their subordinates, while men were more likely to bend or overlook certain rules and more likely to be direct, but less likely to empathize with their subordinates.



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19 Jul 2011, 3:53 am

I have to say it has been 50/50. I have had some female boses that were just cool and very friendly, but I had others that were flaming b*****s and were really intollerant to mistakes of any kind. I never had male bosses that I really liked....some that I tollerated, but none that I could really see on the same page with. Although I would take a male boss over a power-lusted female boss anyday.


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joeyfarlz
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19 Jul 2011, 1:40 pm

Totally, About 6 weeks ago I was verbally abused by a female store manager where I clean. There was an issue with the drains and she wanted me to unblock them, and yelled at me when I didnt... I was like "I'm a cleaner, if you want your toilet unblocked, call a plumber" she then said she unblocked it herself and then told me I hadn't cleaned it yet. I really didn't want to go back to work, but my own boss (from the cleaning company) made a complaint about her treatment of me, even though none of them know about my AS, and she's sort of been alright with me since, she doesn't really want that much to do with me in case she gets told off by her manager again (there is a management team and she isn't the head, like she would like to think)



K-R-X
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19 Jul 2011, 2:14 pm

In male dominated workplaces, female managers I've found to be very pragmatic and very easy to get along with (Military type positions). In these cases they seem to be ultra pragmatic, as I think they are trying to show that they can do it the same way as anyone else.

In more open, female dominated workplaces though, I've met some women that I would never, ever want to meet again. If there were two doors - one with axe murders and the other with catty managers - I would go for the axe murderers every time. At least then I would have a fighting chance.



Chronos
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20 Jul 2011, 12:35 am

K-R-X wrote:
In male dominated workplaces, female managers I've found to be very pragmatic and very easy to get along with (Military type positions). In these cases they seem to be ultra pragmatic, as I think they are trying to show that they can do it the same way as anyone else.

In more open, female dominated workplaces though, I've met some women that I would never, ever want to meet again. If there were two doors - one with axe murders and the other with catty managers - I would go for the axe murderers every time. At least then I would have a fighting chance.


I think you will generally find people with better leaderships skills amongst military personnel.