Misogynists

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Is it just me? Or are a lot of the guys (not all just more than average) in these forums Misogynists?

I never noticed a greater amount of misogyny in WP then in the general public

I think there's a lot of misogyny in our society. I think it's a two-way street. There're a lot of man-hating women out there too. I forget the name for that. Misogyny is clearly more socially institutionalized. I suspect that people with unpopular attitudes (racists, etc.) are more comfortable online than they would be without the anonymity the Internet provides, so it might appear more common online than IRL.

Oh, my deepest apologies. I only just noticed this thread is in the Women's Discussion. I won't hesitate to remove my post on request.

There's less mysogyny here than, let's say rotten.com. The moderators do a great job, protecting you from dealing with real mysogyny. I think you owe them thanks.

I have never been on other sites ,so I cant do a comparision,but...

I know what you mean.I have seen postings that seemed very sexist and female hating.I have a couple theories about this...

I think there are alot of males here who have had negative experience when tring to have a relationship with females.Most of their interaction has been with NT females so they tend to generalize their experience to all females(unfortunate but common human practice..guilty myself)


There are a minority of males here who I think have more issues with seeing females as "human",instead of "objects"....I think this fits the "theory of mind" and because we are on a "spectrum"...some have more difficulty with this then others.I think the root of sexism is very similiar to racism...the less you understand the "other" the easier it is to "objectify" them....when you dont understand something,people tend to fill in the blanks with "stereotypes"to try and make sense of it.


I think men who have had more experience with females, learn how to "edit" what they say,they have made the connection that some of their thoughts,when spoken,get them in alot of trouble with women....they learn not to say (what they think)but some aspie males have either not picked up on the negative nonverbal cues from females when they say these things(and dont know what has offended)or have no relationships with females and other males may reinforce the things they say,so they think its ok.I have had alot of male friendships in which I was seen as "one of the guys"....I have been suprised to find that even the men who I consider very intelligent and generally compassionate people.
Still want to have sex with some highschool cheerleader even though they admit this person is cruel,stupid and annoys them....They can actually seperate their thoughts about the person with their physical desire....thats bizare to me...but I have heard it repeatedly from males.

Unlike much of my experience with males in alot of social situations....I often see males on here who WILL call these sexist individuals on their misconceptions about women.I like that,it helps me have some hope.


As far as the female "misoginy"...most of the above applies but with this addition...

I was never "female" enough growing up...actually thought I was more male...I could not relate to most females,so I also saw them as "other"...in college .I actualy minored in women studies because I wanted to learn more about females and learn to except the "female" in myself.It helped "intellectualy"
but has done nothing for my ability to connect with females...they still dont like me....oh well...I tried
and it did help me with my conflicted "gender" as I now know that there are females who are like me,
even if they are mostly on this site and in books.

Not really. I think people online are just more inclined to express their views.

Although I should mention that Tony Attwood has said sexism is common among AS males. Whether this is true or not depends on whether the people with AS he sees are representative of Aspies as a whole. That's unlikely, since he's likely to see more serious cases of AS.

When one only cares about someone’s looks and would have sex with an attractive woman no matter how dumb or evil she is, or not even seeing women's minds, only seeing women's bodies, that could be viewed as seeing women as objects. If you want to be picky though, that isn't hatred exactly.

I don't see how I'm being picky. Finding someone physically attractive without being attracted to a person's other qualities doesn't even closely resemble hatred.

Also, hatred is a rather strong word. It should be reserved for those who actually hate rather than for those who simply have a lack of respect.

Enigmatic-oddity...

I am not sure I understand what you are saying but if you think I was Offended by being included as "one of the guys"...I wasnt...I liked it and I liked the guys...my point was that I felt like they were speaking more honestly to me then they might have to their girlfriends...

AS far as the cheeleader thing....I am not really judging it as bad,I just was suprised.I couldnt understand the "mindset" of an intellegent compasionate person "wanting" to have sex with someone they admitedly did not like as a person....just seemed to foreign a concept for me to understand.I do think I have "fooled" myself into thinking that someone was a "good guy" to justify following my lusty desires(usually when I was to drunk to make good judgements anyway)butI couldnt see being able to be attracted to someone inspite of their cruelty or stupidity(former worse then the latter)Does that make more sense?

meh. date enough bad females and you'll get that way. Until I bone another one, i'll be mysogenising awhile.

Don't confuse misogyny with sexual deprivated men, who have become agitated and depressed. Most dont' hate girls or women, they are just too naive and "stuck" in their naive mental models because of theory of mind problems and other issues to be able to realize such. AS men who never 'figured it out' how to socialize to maintain relationships with the opposite sex are emotionally and intellectually stunted in that area and will say all manner of things like a child would, not really understanding.

Girls have it much easier then AS men and can get laid whenever they want if they really wanted to, AS guys struggle since women do not overlook social ineptitude or low social value or status easily, like men do in pursuit of sex.

The big thing is for a guy when he goes without sex, is like a girl who cannot have friends or socialize ever in her entire life.

I told this to a girlfriend of mine the other night and she said "I'd kill myself if I had to live like that", because emotionally women need to socialize and connect or they'd become seriously depressed, sex does the same thing for guys. Thats why you have men who are "sexual predators" simply because women won't give them the time of day let alone get laid, that stress builds up and they crack. That's not to say there aren't purposely evil guys out there, but others were simply "normal" inept guys and after so much time alone and deprived finaly snap after years of failure.

Just so nieve people dont get confused.Sexual preditors....alot of men who are rapist have other outlets for sex,girlfriends,wives and prostitutes...rape is a crime of hate and objectification of people
not purely nor even mostly for sex.Rapist do not generally just "snap" from lack of sex,they usely spend years fantasizing about hurting and humiliating men,women or children before they plan and act on these fantasies.Many men and some women may "fantasize" about dominating someone else and never act on it.

Second point...yes,AS women may has less difficulty with finding a person to have sex with them.
It is finding someone who loves and excepts them as they are that is more of a problem.So,many women with AS are more likely to be "used" for sex and unaware that they are being "used" and then have to live with the further sexual stigma of being labeled a slut....I was very nieve as a teen...If
someone told me they liked me,I believed them.I didnt lie so I didnt realize that other people could(and do it sooo well.)Then you get to deal with other guys in school whispering (or yelling) insults.Females hate you because you got attention that they wanted but were to smart to "put out" for.

Maybe some women...maybe even most(I dont know many women)care how much money a guy makes or how popular he is....but I wasnt like that...and I got sick of even the "nerds" in my highschool paying more attention to the Popular/cheerleader/rich/stupid/giggly/boring girls....
I was an intellegent, sensitive,interesting girl in highschool and got a total of three guys (in three years)who talked to me for anything other then sex.

So,before the guys here write the female AS experience off as a cakewalk...please consider what my experience was like....great,lots of sex,low self-esteem,fear of VD and pregnency,just to get some guy who couldnt care less about me to stick his thingy in.....yipes...having fun yet?