If I had a mastectomy would I still be worthy?

Page 1 of 2 [ 20 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

xxZeromancerlovexx
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,421
Location: Inferno Faction

19 Jul 2019, 12:47 pm

Breast cancer runs in my dad’s side of the family and I’m terrified I’ll end up flat chested due to a mastectomy and not be worthy anymore. I can’t pay for implants.

I just need to be a real woman. A woman who doesn’t do manly things like mowing the lawn and body building. That’s what I want...to be feminine and learn cross stitch and gardening. I won’t be worthy of that lifestyle if I’m flat. My C cups are one of my favorite things about me.


_________________
“The most sophisticated people I know- inside they are all children “
-Jim Henson


shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,493

19 Jul 2019, 7:36 pm

The shape of your body has nothing to do with your value as a human being




:mrgreen:



Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,353

19 Jul 2019, 7:51 pm

You need to focus on things you like about yourself more than physical body parts. It’s a good life tip! Let’s face it, gravity happens. Your chest probably won’t look the same in 20 or 30 years, especially if you have children or gain and lose weight.

Even if you have to have a mastectomy someday (which is unlikely), there are special bras you can wear that can make you look as though you have breasts.

You don’t have to have breasts to be feminine. I think breasts (due to breastfeeding) are associated with being a nurturer. You don’t need them to be nurturing.

You don’t need them to garden and cross stitch, either! Why would being flat chested make you “unworthy?”



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 68,599
Location: Queens, NYC

19 Jul 2019, 8:04 pm

You would be as worthy a person as you were before you had the mastectomy.



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,493

19 Jul 2019, 8:06 pm

Please worry less about your retail value as a person and more about the Maslow's hierarchy of needs



xxZeromancerlovexx
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,421
Location: Inferno Faction

20 Jul 2019, 10:15 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
You need to focus on things you like about yourself more than physical body parts. It’s a good life tip! Let’s face it, gravity happens. Your chest probably won’t look the same in 20 or 30 years, especially if you have children or gain and lose weight.

Even if you have to have a mastectomy someday (which is unlikely), there are special bras you can wear that can make you look as though you have breasts.

You don’t have to have breasts to be feminine. I think breasts (due to breastfeeding) are associated with being a nurturer. You don’t need them to be nurturing.

You don’t need them to garden and cross stitch, either! Why would being flat chested make you “unworthy?”

Because I’d be ugly. I’m pretty now but I’d be plain and unattractive.

This is me wearing one of my favorite tops. Can you imagine how awful it would look if I became flat chested?
Image


_________________
“The most sophisticated people I know- inside they are all children “
-Jim Henson


Twilightprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,353

20 Jul 2019, 10:31 pm

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
You need to focus on things you like about yourself more than physical body parts. It’s a good life tip! Let’s face it, gravity happens. Your chest probably won’t look the same in 20 or 30 years, especially if you have children or gain and lose weight.

Even if you have to have a mastectomy someday (which is unlikely), there are special bras you can wear that can make you look as though you have breasts.

You don’t have to have breasts to be feminine. I think breasts (due to breastfeeding) are associated with being a nurturer. You don’t need them to be nurturing.

You don’t need them to garden and cross stitch, either! Why would being flat chested make you “unworthy?”

Because I’d be ugly. I’m pretty now but I’d be plain and unattractive.

This is me wearing one of my favorite tops. Can you imagine how awful it would look if I became flat chested?
Image


Would you still value female friends and family members if they had to have mastectomies and became flat-chested? Do you think they’d be less worthy or less feminine?

Sometimes we judge ourselves harsher than we do other people.

You wouldn’t look awful. Anyway, there are special bras for women (that want them) who are in that situation. With clothes on, they don’t look any different.



Teach51
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,923
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.

21 Jul 2019, 4:50 am

Actually my friend had a radical mastectomy and had reconstructive surgery following that.
Plastic surgery has advanced greatly.


_________________
My best will just have to be good enough.


languagehopper
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jun 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 89
Location: UK

22 Jul 2019, 2:27 am

Worthy is an adjective that conjures up visions of old scholarly men to me! Why do you want to be worthy anyway. You are of value obviously. That goes without saying whatever you look like. Life has value in and of itself. You were born, therefore you have value.

Personally I hated having big breasts flapping about when I tried to run having to be strapped up with tight bands around my ribs impeding my breathing. I lost a lot of weight and they have nearly gone and I am delighted. No more bras for me. My half sister had hers removed because her mother has beast cancer and she has the bad gene. It is on our Dad's side too and my maternal grandmother had it but I prefer not to worry about it. But if I did have it I wouldn't have a reconstruction like my sister did. I assume they aren't functional. The only good thing about my breasts was that they were there for my children when they needed them. What freedom to have a flat chest! It is differences that make people beautiful. Barbie dolls are so uninteresting!


_________________
Maybe if I learn enough languages I will understand humans one day.


Alterity
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 7 Feb 2019
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 492
Location: New England

24 Jul 2019, 1:06 am

Our worth, value, beauty, and femininity doesn't not reside in our breasts.

Whether your chest is large, small or nonexistent has ZERO impact on how beautiful or feminine you are.

My friend's mother did have breast cancer and she had to get a mastectomy. She would wear a tiny bit of padding for appearances sometimes but no one thought any differently of her. She loved to cook, enjoyed gardening, was a good seamstress, and was always taking care of her family. She was very kind, gentle,warm, and probably the nicest person I've known. Not having breasts did not diminish any of those things.


_________________
"Inside the heart of each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world."


Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 41,736
Location: Houston, Texas

24 Jul 2019, 1:42 am

Most people will understand if you have a mastectomy.

If they don't, screw em.


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 93,932
Location: the island of defective toy santas

24 Jul 2019, 1:53 am

i remember reading something in reader's digest ages ago about this woman who related her experience getting breast cancer, and after her mastectomy, she and her husband were watching a tv variety show [Ed Sullivan] when suddenly dancing girls appeared with cleavage, and the woman burst out sobbing, and the husband snapped her out of it by coldly saying to her, "oh what are you crying about now?!" and that made her so angry that she did indeed snap out of it [her self-pity]. for some reason, i'm teary myself as i type this.



y-pod
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Apr 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,319
Location: Canada

26 Jul 2019, 8:24 am

Just want to say to OP: Wow those are not C cups. Have you been fitted recently? They're at least DD, possibly E or F cups. Enjoy them. :D


_________________
AQ score: 44
Aspie mom to two autistic sons (18 & 16 )


Alterity
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 7 Feb 2019
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 492
Location: New England

26 Jul 2019, 2:59 pm

y-pod wrote:
Just want to say to OP: Wow those are not C cups. Have you been fitted recently? They're at least DD, possibly E or F cups. Enjoy them. :D


I totally missed she said C cups. You're certainly right her chest is larger than that. I'm a C that depending on the style or brand can fit in a D. Zeromancerlove is definitively larger than myself.

Cup size actually does fluctuate a little with band size. So even if she was a C it would be a larger C than mine because her band size is also bigger than mine. But from the photo I'd still say she more substantial than a C easily.

I believe with large breasts a simple reduction can help decrease chances of breast cancer, without having to do a full removal mastectomy. I think there was an actress that had this done... Angelina maybe? I forget.


_________________
"Inside the heart of each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world."


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 31,064
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

26 Jul 2019, 3:16 pm

[quote="xxZeromancerlovexx"]Breast cancer runs in my dad’s side of the family and I’m terrified I’ll end up flat chested due to a mastectomy and not be worthy anymore. I can’t pay for implants.


That does not mean you will get it, if you are worried you could get regular screenings so if you did get it it could be treated quicker and damage minimized. Also I forget exactly how it works but I think you can also check yourself for any unusual lumps or anything to get it checked out by a doctor if you notice anything.

That said as far as I know women can still be feminine and do activities they see as such even if they have had such an operation.


_________________
Lucy in the sky with Diamonds.