Anybody ever have an uncrushable crush?

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It's driving me crazy. Just when I think it's over, I will see or speak to this person, and bam! it's back again. I really wish it would go away for good. It's been two years already. How lame is that? Anybody else?

Yes, it's been about 3 years in my case. But the obsessive factor has definatly died down, now I'm kind of at peace with it. I guess this doesn't help you out much, does it...
It will definately die down at some point. Maybe if you got to know the guy better you may realize that he wasn't who you thought, and therefore be less attracted to him. That's kind of what I did. I mean, not so much friendly chat, but rather finding out things about his life, and discovering all his flaws. In fact, if I kept talking to him, I'd probably get over him completely, but I don't see him that often.

I have adored the same person for over two years and he knows it. But he's impossible to get because he despises me and he recently started going out with one of my best friends. I feel like shooting something every time I see them together.

I know what you mean. There is a girl that I can't seem to get past. And she, isn't interested to say the least. I thought I was over her for a while, you know? Then I saw her again, and she can still take my breath away. A friend of mine said I should just let it go, and I deserve better. She's right, this girl is so wrong for me even if she was interested. It's just hard to let it go I guess. I think I might be starting to, but we'll see. We'll see.

Any particular reason this isn't in Love and Dating?

I've had crushes which never died out, but none of them distract me too too much.

If a mod could move this to Love and Dating, that would be fine.

It would help if the guy weren't married. Worse, I keep suspecting that he is a tad interested. I wouldn't want to get into a "forbidden" relationship anyway. Plus, I really like his wife! What a mess.

Ouch! I know what you mean. Once, I was passing by him and his wife, and she rushed over to give him a kiss. I wanted to cry.

I had one for years as a teen.
SInce got married to guy I ADORE.
But I saw old crush on the street the other day and stopped breathing. :p
COuldn't help it.

Either I'm old or crazy...My crush? I was about 17...senior year in HS...I am now 39! Yes, I think that's a record. I finally did marry and my husband is great, but honestly, I talk to my friend (we are above all good friends) about once a year...and deep in my heart I know I could never see him again...I thought about moving, but when I found out it would be where he lives, I changed plans quickly. He also laughed and told me, "oh geez, it would NOT be good to run into each other"...and this, after 22 years...kind of scarry...

But yes, I do love my husband dearly. He is a wonderful guy. But sadly, I think I would pass out if I ever saw this other person again...therefore, I have avoided it at all costs...and so has he.

Last year, I had a crush on a guy who goes to my clubhouse. Every time he came, I used to put my Clash CD into the karaoke machine and play, '1-2 Crush on You'. We're just good friends now, but that crush was uncrushable, around this time, last year.

The crush is the crux topic

I do not know how old you are, hartzofspace, but ever since I entered the change of life I have not had any crushes. I know how you feel as I was tormented by them for years. They would make me sick--totally unrealistic and unrequited love. I empathize with anyone who has these anxiety attacks--this is how they feel to me, when the subject of the crush would come into my viewing area. the flood of emotion was so intense that I figured this was what Mr. Spock went through during Vulcan 'heat'. Very uncomfortable. I would not wish this on anyone.

Rest assured, though, it does eventually pass. One day it just disappears.

that's made me feel better. I can't wait for them to end. I've become convinced that this is the reason I can't have a real-life, functioning relationship. My one track mind won't let me notice other men. I have to really concentrate on it when I go out, consciously think about looking at other men, looking at who else is in the room that I might like.

I actually slept with mine. He runs a club I used to go to all the time, (and sometimes go to now). Last new year, he broke up with his girlfriend for about a week. I was standing outside his club at closing time, trying to find a friend who's house I always went to so we could drink vodka to pass out. The man I like picked me up - literally picked me up! - and put me in a cab next to him. I was trying to finish a conversation, but he counted down from 5 to 1 and closed the cab door. I should add that we had been flirting for months and I was not entirely unhappy about the situation, ahahaha. We went back to his and had drunk sex.

He made it known that this episode was not to be repeated via a series of increasingly rude, sarcastic myspace messages, which I did not 'get' because my understanding of sarcasm is very poor. I have not had a proper conversation with him since, although he'll speak to me if it involves 'business' (I often write about the bands on his label or mention the club in reviews). I think about him every day.

He was temporarily usurped in my affections by his tattoed, rockabilly styled housemate, but not for long.

That sounds rough. I'm surprised you still think about him after he was so rude. Has it been a long time?

It's the most terrible feeling in the world. I've been feeling it nonstop for over a year, since he officially rejected me. I don't even like to refer to my feelings as a "crush" because they are far too strong for a giggly schoolgirl term like that. I am hit by little sparks of God whenever he is in sight.

Just one...he died in a car crash years ago.

We spent hours on the phone together staying up half the night talking....and a bit more. One of the few people I could ever really talk to...about anything.

He had a crush on someone else, the girl he was dating, he worshiped the ground that she walked on but she didn't have a clue...he knew how I felt, although I would never say it out loud.

He got into a fight with her, I was out that night somewhere else...he called my house a couple of times that night, and a couple people told me he had been looking for me...in all the wrong places. He rolled his car less than a mile away from his house going home.

i used to get crushes on a regular basis, about 1-2 a year on average, ( some far more intense than others) then here in france frequency reduced to zilch. Which is maybe why when a new one suddenly rolled over me 4 years ago ( aged 40, not quite the menopause!!) it was so unfamiliar that i saw it clearly, and what it was was a gigantic attack of fear.

The sinking sensation, the mist before the eyes, the legs losing all strength, the faintness. And i suddenly realised that i no longer wanted to feel like that. I just told myself to stop it. And i did.

Previously i'd got a rush/buzz out of it; actually missed it when i didn't have a crush on someone.

Now i'm crush free. but i did have some trulymadlydeeply ones, long and exquisitely painful. One in particular ( out of the half dozen most memorable) was like torture, self inflicted of course. I longed, and craved, and yearned, and suffered, it was very addictive. I actually had to move towns to escape that one, because i just couldn't seem to stop it.

All that antici...pation, never disappointed.