Have you ever felt that you are such a boring person?

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sassyaspie
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19 Nov 2007, 9:44 pm

Recently I have felt that I am so boring. Will I ever find someone who loves me if I am this boring? Will it affect my career while on communication terms, people love to be with interesting, humorous and sensitive people.


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Eire
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19 Nov 2007, 10:31 pm

I feel boring. Well I feel that I am boring other people, I never bore myself. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to post here because I'm so boring.



MysteryFan3
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19 Nov 2007, 10:32 pm

I find your question extremely interesting and stimulating. Are you sure you're boring?

I feel like that, sometimes. Who doesn't when life gets clunky? Keep putting one foot in front of the other and you'll escape the muck soon enough. Life, love and career will be fine.


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MysteryFan3
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19 Nov 2007, 10:33 pm

Eire wrote:
I feel boring. Well I feel that I am boring other people, I never bore myself. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to post here because I'm so boring.


Your post makes me dance.


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Deus_ex_machina
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20 Nov 2007, 12:59 am

Eire wrote:
I feel boring. Well I feel that I am boring other people, I never bore myself. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to post here because I'm so boring.


Really? I find myself to be extremely exciting, incidentally I also wonder why I both posting here. :P


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i_Am_andaJoy
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20 Nov 2007, 1:01 am

no. actually i don't. but i do wonder a lot about other people and why they are so boring because i don't get it... aren't they BORED?


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Deus_ex_machina
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20 Nov 2007, 1:01 am

sassyaspie wrote:
Recently I have felt that I am so boring. Will I ever find someone who loves me if I am this boring? Will it affect my career while on communication terms, people love to be with interesting, humorous and sensitive people.


Are you sure you are all that boring? Have you taken a test? On a scale on one to ten how boring would you say that you are? Do you have a Borometre (Measures tendency to be boring)? :P


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i_Am_andaJoy
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20 Nov 2007, 1:02 am

oh, and also, if you worry all the time about being boring, then you probably aren't even boring to begin with. just neurotic.


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Adrie
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21 Nov 2007, 5:37 am

I've felt that way too, because others have called me boring before. :oops:

But I've learned that it's a lot more boring to wander around worrying if you're boring than to do what you love, even if others think your hobbies are boring. Pursuing your own interests makes you interesting, especially if you're confident enough to avoid hiding them. I know that sounds very cheesy or something, haha, but people have told me that and I've learned that they're right.

I know what you mean, though. It's something I'm still trying to work through, but mostly I just force myself to get over it and recognize that I'm only boring if I let myself be, if that makes sense...



daniel23
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24 Nov 2007, 12:29 am

Dont know if i am allowed to post in women section, but i often think this about myself too.

I could love someone who is "Boring" , in fact be a lot better and more simple :D Hell id be more boring.

Saying that Im too much of a pain in the ass to have anyone love me again :lol: and not sure id like get close to anyone again. Only been close to one person ever and she Image



poopylungstuffing
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24 Nov 2007, 7:20 pm

ever since I found out that my boyfriend had been cheating on me with this rediculous NT hyperactive teenaged erotic services provider...who I constantly had to be around because I did not know they were having an affair...I realised just how boring I must be..even though I thought she was boring...all she does is lie about having travelled through Europe and talk about drugs.....and hyperactive crazy BS...about 60-70% lies....

but compared to her I must seem extremely boring...and that is why he cheated on me....
I am told that isn't true...but I think there must be something to it....

Boring 32 year old with neuro issues vs. hyperactive bubbly squeaky lying teenager....

bah...



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24 Nov 2007, 7:43 pm

Many times. I bore people to the brink of suicide if I go over the top.


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24 Nov 2007, 8:52 pm

poopylungstuffing wrote:
but compared to her I must seem extremely boring...and that is why he cheated on me....
I am told that isn't true...but I think there must be something to it....

Boring 32 year old with neuro issues vs. hyperactive bubbly squeaky lying teenager....

bah...


I suspect that this "man" has reason of his own that preceed your relationship with him, something he's never confronted about himself. Don't be so hard on yourself - granted I'm 36, and I know how easy it is to feel inferior too younger women in terms of sexual appeal. But th truth is, men don't "prefer" younger women because they are more attractive - in fact, many older men genuinely find younger women annoying, irritating and quite boring, if they were more honest with themselves. But men often they THINK they should find younger women more attractive. In other words, men like this are suffering from one hell of a mindf*** and it has nothing to do with us older women and whether we're "boring." It's how society conditions them, and yeah, it's pretty sad.

Society instills a deep fear of getting older in men just as it does with women. Men fear their own loss of sexual vigor, physical ability and the "social relevance" the comes with it, and being with a yonger women helps them pretend they're not as old as they really are. Ever watch Everybody Loves Raymond? They did a really good episode about this, when Robert was dating a girl who was a lot younger than him. In teh end Robert had to admit he liked being with her not because he really connected with her, but because it made him feel not as old as he was.

Sorry you ahve to go through this, but know you're far from teh only one who's been there. It's really not fair that us older women have to bear such an ugly blow to our self-esteem just because men can't accept getting older. Just don't blame yourself - seriously. Just don't. He's already lied to you enough. You don't need to lie to yourself.



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24 Nov 2007, 9:03 pm

In the past I felt boring because other peopel told me so. Then I realized it's not me. I'm actually a pretty cool person. I'm curious and intersted in a wide variety of stuff, I can talk about just about anything under the sun, I'm a good listener and I can be genuinely intersted in what other people say. Don't I sound awesome?? LOL. My problem is that when someone else bores me, I just tune out and fade off into my own little world. I never realized I was doing it, because people often bore me. But I'm older now, nd I know how when I'm around cool people, I'm a completley different person. Now I'm learning how to not be so passive and instead to take control politely of a conversation when I'm bored and turn it into something more stimulating.

I also notice people often are intimidated by me, like they think I want to be the center of attention, and will do passive-aggressive crap to keep me "in my place." My family does that, and so whenever other people do it, I instinctively react as I do around my family - I withdraw into my shell and don't participate in the conversation. Yeah, that makes me appear boring, and it pisses me off now that I know why I do that. But other people's insecurities and excessive need to be the center of attention themselves do not make me a boring person.



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25 Nov 2007, 5:50 am

poopylungstuffing wrote:
ever since I found out that my boyfriend had been cheating on me with this rediculous NT hyperactive teenaged erotic services provider...who I constantly had to be around because I did not know they were having an affair...I realised just how boring I must be..even though I thought she was boring...all she does is lie about having travelled through Europe and talk about drugs.....and hyperactive crazy BS...about 60-70% lies....

but compared to her I must seem extremely boring...and that is why he cheated on me....
I am told that isn't true...but I think there must be something to it....

Boring 32 year old with neuro issues vs. hyperactive bubbly squeaky lying teenager....

bah...
Nah, he cheated on you because he's an immature jerk. It doesn't mean you're boring - it means he didn't take the time to get to know you properly. If it's any consolation, she'll probably give him the heave-ho sooner or later because she'll think he's boring.


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25 Nov 2007, 11:48 am

I'm not boring in the abstract...it's mainly a communication issue.

Conversations are always a problem; either I say nothing at all (Better to keep silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt! - Mark Twain), or I get 'the verbal runs', and don't know when to shut up. There's facial and behavioral protocols in sending and receiving 'shut up' hints, and I don't catch them. I try to memorize them, but it's not always that easy.

I do feel concerned on occasion when I don't have anything 'interesting' to say. I feel that I should have fascinating reparte and sallys of wit...but I'm not always up to it.