need help

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I have worked with and tested many kids on the spectrum, have a child and husband on the spectrum and have some traits (more due from ADHD) but I am not an expert because I don't experience it. I know everyone has their own perspectives and beliefs but am hoping to get some guidance or advice.

I just tested a girl (age 10) who has been in trouble for various reasons but haven't heard specifics - I am thinking she is having meltdowns but that hasn't even been mentioned. We are testing her cognitive just because parents and school wanted to know - curious. She came with me for testing and didn't get any typical "NT" reactions. I tried a few other approaches that cause most people to have some kind of interest, reaction or statement. Nothing. I tried to find an area of interest and really couldn't. I am usually good at getting all students on the spectrum to do or show something.. such as smile, state something factual or play with something interesting that is around. I don't push students if they don't want to talk. That is their right and everyone is different. I explained the testing and we continued. She was/is extremely nice.She wasn't having what I would consider a bad attitude at all.


Usually after an hour of working with children (aspergers, depression, aggression, etc), I usually get some reactions that may indicate either frustration, enjoyment(even a little smile or a statement), high interest in a particular subtest... just something. I got nothing from her (that I could see) throughout the test.
She did want to be there, though. I gave her options to go back to class or continue testing. She said continue and waited for the next activity. Her IQ was calculated and her verbal score was higher than anyone I have ever tested; higher than kids in gifted program!! ! During the testing, I told her how good she was doing and she said, "I know." The statement was factual and to the point. Nothing wrong with that statement at all as it was true... she was not being conceited as that does not seem to be her personality.

I feel bad for her.She is obviously going through some stuff at school or she wouldn't have her meltdowns.I worry about possible depression and anxiety but with her it's hard to know anything. I strongly believe she has Aspergers and find it hard to believe that absolutely no one has brought up that possibility before. How? I am not actually calling her aspergers as I don't know her well enough and am going on only a few hours working with her. Just after two hours, I could say that I strongly doubt that her behaviors are caused primarily by depression, anxiety, conduct problems/oppositional due to primarily a need for control... It is not that - can't be.

In the classroom, she is doing better on a "token" system where she can earn rewards for good behavior. I don't even know the specifics of what good behavior means though. She really doesn't strike me as the type of person to have "conduct problems" at all - she doesn't purposely have oppositional behaviors.

Perhaps I am completely off in my brief observation/assessment of her. I could be..

Any suggestions?

I need to help her but don't know how to even approach this. It just seems like everyone is completely misunderstanding her.. or maybe it's just me.Girls are often not identified with aspergers and are usually identified later as having bipolar or some other thing. I don't want that to happen to her if it truly is aspergers.

Ds was so well behaved at school and was a terror at home. He bottled everything up when he was at school and saved it for when he was home. Maybe since you are a new person to her she feels more at ease and has no reason to react? DS behaves so well for new people but once he gets to know them it is a different story.. Maybe that is what you are seeing? If your gut tells you follow it--I learned that the hard way! This is coming from a mom not a pro.

She may have another thing to consider "Reactive Attachment Disorder"

From what you said about your brief interaction, she does fit the "mold" of Aspie. But as you're aware, Aspie has symptoms common of many other disorders. I'd rule out RAD and if it's not that... that's the only other thing I could think of to present that way. RAD or Aspie.

My suggestions:

* Find out what her behavioral problems are. That seems a little uncertain based on how I interpreted what you said. Maybe they can be rationalized as: impulsivity, reactions to sensory stimulation, misread nonverbal communication, or meltdowns, as you are already speculating. There's gotta be some clues in finding out what's causing the attention to her behavior. It's also safe for you to ask about without throwing up and flags that you are suspecting an ASC.

* If you are more convinced at the possibility she's got an ASC, then you are in a great position to "mind worm" the parents or staff members of the idea. An innocent comment saying "she remind me a little of my ___________ because of ___________ similar behavior. Then tell them some of the behavior of your _____________ does that is explained by their diagnosis... that you may have also observed in this girl. Allot of people have absolutely no idea what the Autistic "Spectrum" is. Your small description of your ____________ may be the first they ever hear about the condition. You can get it in there without playing "diagnostician" and getting people upset. You just need to be a little ninja about it.

BTW... Being the person that let's someone in on a really HUGE secret about themselves, is kinda like being Morpheus in "The Matrix". I have a friend that is seeking diagnosis now, and I was the one that gave him the pill. "Read this book, I think you may find it interesting" I told him. After a bit of reflection, he thanked me. He did say "[expletive] I should have taken the other pill!" a few times at the beginning though.

Obviously being almost 40, or almost 11 years old, will have a significant influence on the person's and their loved ones reaction. If you think you're on to something, do what you think is best for the girl.