Moral questions about aspies/auties having children together

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I do not think it is wrong at all, if you want children, then have them. But, just think about whether or not you are willing to commit to the responsibility of raising them. It is a lot of work----especially if the child has special needs. But, if your heart's desire is to be a parent, then go for it!

Probably won't have kids - well, not biologically anyway. Adoption, on the other hand, sounds like it'd be more plausible for someone like me (though whatever kid I adopt I would like them to be toilet-trained, please!!) Ideally, I'd rather have a girl than a boy, 'cuz I don't want to have to face any memories of my dad and I not getting along so well when he's in his teens

As for whether it's "wrong" for Aspies/auties to have kids, well...keep in mind Asperger's is a WIDE spectrum!! Certain Aspie friends of mine could easily pass for "normal" enough in the "real world" that I just can't see them having a problem with something like this, while most of them will probably have just as many problems as those in a "regular" relationship - the ins, the outs, and everything in between (though chances are, most of my Aspie friends would not want to have kids). Those a bit lower on the autism spectrum I can't picture having kids, but even at that it still wouldn't be "wrong" IMO. One of my (step) cousins has a "low-functioning" mental diagnosis (though it isn't anywhere on the autism spectrum as far as I know), but she's also the type that has had a couple of relationships and (I think?!) had a kid or two. However I think someone else takes care of him/her now

Nothing at all wrong with it.

My husband and I decided to have children even though we knew there's a high chance they'll develop cancer. My husband himself had childhood cancer, and the women in my family have a high risk for breast cancer. Diabetes also runs on my family, along with many neurological and mood disorders (including Tourrettes).

This was long before either of us thought there was a chance we were on the spectrum. Do I think we were morally wrong for doing so? NO! We gave two beautiful children a chance at life. They may only be 2 and 3 right now, but they seem to be enjoying life immensely.

Absolutely not wrong. If my family were to not do that, none of us would exist by now because so many are autistic or have other neurological or health issues. (Seriously there's next to no even close to typical brains or bodies in the lot of us.)

I don't think there is anything wrong with it at all! I myself want to have kids someday.

Let's see, apart from AS, diabetes and Alzheimer's run in the family. So I personally don't feel I should pass on my genes, the world is overpopulated enough as it is.

If you and your partner are independant in every way, and have the means and desire to have a child by all means have a child!

As far as the population problem goes, my rule is don't make more than you are!

Two people should have no more than two children.

One person should have no more than one child.

Simple, but socially responsible.

What I think is something that should be applied to ALL couples, NT or not. The genes of the child are not the issue I have...it is the fitness of the parents. And again, before you continue, there are a LOT of NT couples out there who in my opinion do not meet this criteria and should never have had or adopted children.

At this point in my life I do not trust myself to be a fit parent. I want to know first that I can be in a relationship with a man, that I can marry, and that we are a good couple for each other and for a future child. But if I DID find such a man and the relationship was good, I've definitely considered this question. ADHD runs strongly in my dad's family, but I think that whatever it is has intensified in me, even though not to full AS levels (that I know of). Knowing the sorts of men I am interested in, I suspect that the ASD-like traits would intensify again. And I am ready for the possibility and believe that there would be absolutely nothing wrong with it. (Better, even, for a child with an ASD to be born into a family where one or both parents has some insight, perhaps? )

But I want to know that I am capable of being a parent first, before I have ANY child.

I would have to know if the parents are capable of having a loving, stable relationship with each other so that the child grows up in a home that meets their emotional needs. If a couple cannot have a stable relationship, it is better that they not have children, so that they are not bringing children into a bad situation that is of THEIR making. They also need to be ready for the emotional, financial, and time commitments of having a child.

And if you ask me, ALL couples ought to be prepared for a child with special needs, and if they are not prepared for that, they should not have children. After all, even the most physically "perfect" child can have an accident--and can become a special needs child unexpectedly.

I do think, however, that couples should weigh it very, very carefully if there is reason to believe they will pass a life-threatening condition on to their children. (The vast majority of ASDs are NOT life-threatening, and I do not see as being relevant to this paragraph.) In this case, I think it would be wise to give some thought to adoption...far too many children will grow up without a loving home, if someone does not reach out and adopt them. Giving such a child a home is a worthy thing, too. (And of course, adopting a child on the spectrum is a viable option as well, and one that would mean a lot. )

If the couple is committed and truly able to have a stable relationship, regardless of who they are, I think that they will truly bless their children.

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Official diagnosis: ADHD, synesthesia. Aspie quiz result (unofficial test): Like Frodo--I'm a halfling? 110/200 NT, 109/200 Aspie.

Personally, I would consult a geneticist first to weigh the risks if I ever considered having children. I would not pressure my [theoretical] wife to abort is she was going to have a LFA kid though.

If both aspie parents are on ssi/disability then no. Only because they could create another autistic/Asperger person who might end up depending on society for extra help like the parents. If they are both or one parent is working then yes they should be able to have as many children as they want whether they create a NT or an Aspie child.. They would be more capable of helping the child learn the skills to deal with his/her differences to make it in a hostile to autistic people society. I know this post will make me out to be a villian to some people and I am sorry its my opinion. Please take in mind I might have to go on ssi so I am not descriminating just telling some ugly truths. I would do my best not to make any children while lacking rescources to give them a good start in society.

No, but I would advise healthcare professionals taking a look at the couple first.

Aspies having a child is ok in my book, they are able to function in society and quite well at that if you let them
But people with down syndrome or other disorders/diseases that are detrimental to a functioning body are a big no. This may sound racist but it's just madness. The genepool does not want this. Just because we're human and have compassion doesn't mean we should destroy our species. Because that's what going to happen if weak members of the species reproduce.

Deidara--that's why I tend to push a lot of it back on the parents rather than the genetics themselves. Human character and choice are not something that I believe to be fully explainable by genetics. I think the most important thing to look at (once we've moved past conditions that actually cut someone's lifespan) is whether the parents will be able to raise the children in a good environment, and can have a good relationship with each other, since children need that too. Once you're out of the life-threatening condition realm, I think character and commitment become the main drivers of success, as long as we recognize that success can come in many guises. If you have the maturity, in all respects, to become a parent, then even when the situation is challenging, odds are in your favor that you are raising a child who will be able to thrive even if certain circumstances (such as an ASD).

Whereas, if you have a couple that might not have ANYTHING medically diagnosable, but they are immature, make poor decisions, and expose their child to an emotionally and physically unhealthy environment, they are cutting the odds greatly of a child having the skills and the drive to rise above their circumstances (though make no mistake, it CAN be done, and that's where choice, character, and commitment come into it).

I think it takes a lot of self-knowledge and understanding, and a lot of maturity to become a truly fit and responsible parent. And as mentioned before, I believe you can fail the test for many reasons and under that standard I think the exclusions would not fall down NT/non-NT lines, but would be very much an individual matter. (Though I should mention--if people knew and took the standards seriously, you'd probably get some surprising individuals who would rise to meet the challenge even though they might not have known they had it in them.)

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Official diagnosis: ADHD, synesthesia. Aspie quiz result (unofficial test): Like Frodo--I'm a halfling? 110/200 NT, 109/200 Aspie.