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This changes EVERYTHING for me, I have lots of hope now !

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tall-p
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20 Jan 2011, 5:48 pm

gator_fan wrote:
How do you know that no one moves very far ?

I'm old. I wear my trousers rolled.


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20 Jan 2011, 6:01 pm

MidlifeAspie wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
Hopefully its not "were" but "are" instead.


He does sound like an ad rep. Never really answers anything, just gives lots of fluffy answers that make good sound bites but have no depth or meaning. Implying that he is changing into a non-aspie via magic tea. I am pretty sure he is not not now, nor ever has been, anywhere on the spectrum.


An ad rep for the Florida Gators...I wish !

Ask me a question and you will get an answer.



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20 Jan 2011, 6:05 pm

gator_fan wrote:
I have had several periods since I started drinking this stuff where I feel much less Aspie-like.

What does this mean?
Does my Aspie-ness feel like your Aspie-ness?
Is there an ISO standard of Aspie-ness? (the "As" unit, maybe? :wink: )


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gator_fan
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20 Jan 2011, 6:08 pm

Cornflake wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
I have had several periods since I started drinking this stuff where I feel much less Aspie-like.

What does this mean?
Does my Aspie-ness feel like your Aspie-ness?
Is there an ISO standard of Aspie-ness? (the "As" unit, maybe? :wink: )


This is a decent question

I would love to know, what is yours like, I have told you a bit about mine. I'm being serious too.



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20 Jan 2011, 6:09 pm

tall-p wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
How do you know that no one moves very far ?

I'm old. I wear my trousers rolled.


I don't roll mine but I consider myself probably over the average age of participants on this forum



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20 Jan 2011, 6:11 pm

Severus wrote:
Two words: gratuitous advertising.

Sorry, this just rings fake for me.


Sorry you ring as someone that has little experience. Eye for an eye with that one

I told you I am not claiming anything other than what I have written

I'm interested if someone/anyone gets the same result as me


One point:

I admit that I'm starting to get nasty and personal. I'm fed up with all the criticism. I am looking for positive or negative feedback on jiaogulan and whether it has helped anyone else out.



Last edited by gator_fan on 20 Jan 2011, 6:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.

tall-p
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20 Jan 2011, 6:21 pm

gator_fan wrote:
I'm interested if someone/anyone gets the same result as me

Feeling calmer just isn't a result in my little world. It's not that I don't feel calm. If a cup of tea would make me interested in the little ins and outs in the daily lives of the people I come into contact with... then that tea would interest me. Or if I would notice and react to little facial gestures in the faces of the people I deal with, and I could make my face do that too, and react in a natural way to those cues that I never see... I'd try it.


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20 Jan 2011, 6:33 pm

tall-p wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
I'm interested if someone/anyone gets the same result as me

Feeling calmer just isn't a result in my little world. It's not that I don't feel calm. If a cup of tea would make me interested in the little ins and outs in the daily lives of the people I come into contact with... then that tea would interest me. Or if I would notice and react to little facial gestures in the faces of the people I deal with, and I could make my face do that too, and react in a natural way to those cues that I never see... I'd try it.


First I appreciate your thoughtful answer which seems to be in the minority when it comes to responding to something I have written.

Great points. Now we are getting somewhere finally in this discussion

OK, when it comes to making me interested in the little ins and outs and reacting to facial gestures I must confess that it doesn't do that directly HOWEVER, it creates enough calmness which gives rise to patience so I have the ability to focus more on these things. In other words, I'm not so anxious to get my 2 cents in or direct the conversation towards something that is to my interest/benefit which allows me plenty of "free time" to focus on things like other peoples interests.

I wouldn't say I have become any sort of master of people skills nor do I think I will ever be; what I am saying is that now I have a fighting chance at not flaming out in every possible way in 95% of the personal interactions I have with others.

I feel like I am on more even footing with most folks and that the line has shifted, even if just a bit. Let's say I was in the bottom 5% in terms of people skills. Maybe now I have the ability to achieve the bottom 10% or even 20 %.



Last edited by gator_fan on 20 Jan 2011, 6:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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20 Jan 2011, 6:35 pm

gator_fan wrote:
Cornflake wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
I have had several periods since I started drinking this stuff where I feel much less Aspie-like.
What does this mean?
Does my Aspie-ness feel like your Aspie-ness?
Is there an ISO standard of Aspie-ness? (the "As" unit, maybe? :wink: )
This is a decent question

I would love to know, what is yours like, I have told you a bit about mine. I'm being serious too.

What I mean is, what does "less Aspie-like" actually mean?


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20 Jan 2011, 6:35 pm

tall-p wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
How do you know that no one moves very far ?

I'm old. I wear my trousers rolled.


Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
I do not think that they will sing to me.

You sir, are excellent :)



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20 Jan 2011, 6:39 pm

gator_fan wrote:
HOWEVER, it creates enough calmness and patience in my world that I have the ability to focus more on these aspects. In other words, I'm not so anxious to get my 2 cents in or direct the conversation towards something that is to my interest which allows me plenty of "free time" to focus on things like other peoples interests.


I think what he and many others may be saying is that anxiety is not the reason we have trouble with these things, therefore reducing anxiety through a magic tea is not going to solve our problems. I think you have Aspergers and Anxiety Disorders confused. While they may be co-morbid, they are not the same thing. Aspergers does not cause anxiety. I lifetime spent living with Aspergers might.



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20 Jan 2011, 6:41 pm

Cornflake wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
Cornflake wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
I have had several periods since I started drinking this stuff where I feel much less Aspie-like.
What does this mean?
Does my Aspie-ness feel like your Aspie-ness?
Is there an ISO standard of Aspie-ness? (the "As" unit, maybe? :wink: )
This is a decent question

I would love to know, what is yours like, I have told you a bit about mine. I'm being serious too.

What I mean is, what does "less Aspie-like" actually mean?


I don't get your question, which word do you not understand ? If you think there are no common characteristics among Aspies then state your case.



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20 Jan 2011, 6:45 pm

gator_fan wrote:
OK, when it comes to making me interested in the little ins and outs and making a reacting to facial gestures I must confess that it doesn't do that directly HOWEVER, it creates enough calmness and patience in my world that I have the ability to focus more on these aspects. In other words, I'm not so anxious to get my 2 cents in or direct the conversation towards something that is to my interest which allows me plenty of "free time" to focus on things like other peoples interests.

(Ok, partially answers my earlier question)

But my socializing difficulties have nothing to do with being calm/not calm about it - I simply don't see and/or understand most social routines and related facial stuff, even if I'm already perfectly calm.
I don't get them not because I'm not calm - I simply don't get them, and I can already focus on them as much as I want, to the point of tears and frustration - but I still don't get them.


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tall-p
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20 Jan 2011, 6:45 pm

MidlifeAspie wrote:
tall-p wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
How do you know that no one moves very far ?

I'm old. I wear my trousers rolled.


Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
I do not think that they will sing to me.

You sir, are excellent :)

:) thanks for the kind words.


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20 Jan 2011, 6:46 pm

MidlifeAspie wrote:
gator_fan wrote:
HOWEVER, it creates enough calmness and patience in my world that I have the ability to focus more on these aspects. In other words, I'm not so anxious to get my 2 cents in or direct the conversation towards something that is to my interest which allows me plenty of "free time" to focus on things like other peoples interests.


I think what he and many others may be saying is that anxiety is not the reason we have trouble with these things, therefore reducing anxiety through a magic tea is not going to solve our problems. I think you have Aspergers and Anxiety Disorders confused. While they may be co-morbid, they are not the same thing. Aspergers does not cause anxiety. I lifetime spent living with Aspergers might.


Now maybe you are getting somewhere. My anxiety seems to have been increasing over time.

But I think I am also an Aspie. And I think for me their is a strong relationship between the two problems for me. When I reduce my anxiety I believe I am less Aspie like. Whether this is deliberate on my part or a natural consequence is worth debating and I'm sure I am deliberately trying to relate to people because I am trying to make up for lost time and also tired of flaming out with everyone and everything



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20 Jan 2011, 6:49 pm

Cornflake wrote:

But my socializing difficulties have nothing to do with being calm/not calm about it - I simply don't see and/or understand most social routines and related facial stuff, even if I'm already perfectly calm.
I don't get them not because I'm not calm - I simply don't get them, and I can already focus on them as much as I want, to the point of tears and frustration - but I still don't get them.


This is my point. The OP doesn't actually understand Aspergers and thinks it is some kind of Anxiety Disorder. This is why there has been such a disconnect. He feels less anxious (which is an attribute I can entirely believe) and has been calling that "less-Aspie". We all know that there is no drug, tea or therapy that makes anyone "less-Aspie".