On the concept of looking bad

Post Reply New Topic

Maybe it was training or something else, or maybe desire to be accepted, but in practice I have adopted the following philosophy:

1.) There are things that may look bad from a certain perspective and in some instances (e.g. if the motivation is bad going in).
2.) Looking bad can be very hurtful and create hurt feelings all around, so it should not be done; it can be a lot more headache than it's worth.
3.) The only way to overcome looking bad in order to look good in situations that can be interpreted as being bad is to have good social graces.
4.) As someone with Asperger's, I do not have good social graces.
5.) Therefore, I should not do anything that may look bad.

I found it a big relief to care less about looking bad. I still put some effort into it but not as much. I try to have good manners to make up for it. I guess I basically try not to be offensive but I'm tired of worrying about it. I put together a system of which clothes look best, which hairstyle is easy and looks reasonably good, be clean, be nice and then just let it go. There are many characters in the world and maybe I'm one of them. That's what I like about New Oleans. There are so many characters. You can't be inappropriate in NOLA.

I get it. This is what I tried to do when I was young, and probably what I do now, if I'm being honest.