How "aquaintances" become "friends"?

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How is it done? I cant help but thinking about relationships as video game "bars", where a conversation scores you a point, a good joke two points and so on untill you fill out your "bar" and go from "neutral" to "friendly" to "Revered" and so on.

But it doesnt seem that way. How two strangers become friends? Its like when do few grains of sand become a pile.

Good question. I always assumed interpersonal relationships functioned like they did in The Sims 2, where you have a short-term and long-term relationship bar that you fill-out collectively with interactions that merit the plus or minus signs that appear on top of a person's head. (But I was autistic so I couldn't see the signs.) Apparently not.

Anyone?

I have a hard time making friends, but I think I am starting to make one now. We were coworkers, but she invited me to go hiking with her...I actually did (go me!), and she has invited me several times since. Now, she texts me sometimes (I handle texts better than phones), and I think I consider her a friend...I don't know if she considers me a friend or an acquaintance...she's a very outgoing and friendly person anyway, so who knows. She doesn't know about my possible AS, but then again, she's pretty marginalized herself as a lesbian, so I think maybe she doesn't see being different as a bad thing.

I think your video game bar metaphor isn't far off, to be honest! The positive interactions just build up.

I cant help but think that its really not quite like that. When the sand grain becomes a pile? When does a few conversations and small talks reach into the critical mass which invokes "invitation for a hike"? If those defintions are specific for everyone (some will invite you right away, some maybe much later) do you think NT can spot those definitions or "relationships bars" and create a social stratagey for a relationship? I couldnt help but wonder how NTs can know when to invite someone to a hike if not for seeing and invisible relationship "bar".

I don't have an answer to that, considering I don't think I'm NT (awaiting testing appointments). I'm guessing that she felt connected to me somehow and wanted to go beyond the "coworker" status and into "friend" status? As to when, I suppose it depends on how outgoing the person is, how invested s/he is willing to become, how s/he dealt with past experiences with acceptance/rejection, how necessary friends are to him/her, whether or not s/he just wanted a companion to do a pleasurable activity so it might as well be you...etc. I still think your metaphor is apt. Maybe some NTs will answer...