Why so many Aspies pity themselves?

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I pity myself sometimes, but I'm actually proud of my Aspergers. There are many great aspects and quirks about myself that I wouldn't have if it wasn't for it.

Finally found it... lol

Honestly I do not pity myself with having AS and I'm very proud of having it and I feel no problem with it. The part that I do hate though, is the co-morbid conditions like Anxiety and OCD, those I'm never proud of and would do anything to get rid of them.

I pity myself as an Aspie because I always feel like I'm doing something wrong. I've been rejected and humiliated in the past, which began to make me think that I can't be good enough, especially when kids at school always left me out, and they done it delibrately aswell because they enjoyed seeing me on my own. Then I used to think to myself, ''if I didn't have Asperger's, I wouldn't be this left out''. Also, because I'm a high-functioning female, I sort of still have social traits, so I always wanted to have friends through school but couldn't get them. I remember talking normally to other kids, recognising non-verbal social cues, and being friendly like saying hello, but that still wasn't quite what they wanted. I just somehow wasn't on their wavelength I suppose, no matter how fine I was able to communicate. It does make me feel very ashamed of myself, thinking back.

And I'm so timid aswell. I've discovered in my cleaning job at the old people's home that I could never be a carer, because I'm too timid. I probably wouldn't be firm enough, I'd just stand there meekly, being afraid to worry the residents or hurt their feelings or whatever. It says everywhere that Aspies lack empathy, but I think I have too much empathy, which makes me worry so much about how others are feeling that I keep getting guilt-tripped all the time. Like today at work another worker was being a bit bossy to me, which made me feel a bit small. So I told my supervisor, I wasn't being aa telltale, I was just gossiping really, just saying that this woman is a bit bossy and I asked my supervisor if the woman was bossy to her too. My supervisor said she is, and she is just that type of person, which I knew already. But a couple of hours later the bossy woman came up to me and said (in a joking way) ''I hope I'm not too scary.'' Judging by how she said it, I could tell that my supervisor told her what I said, and that the bossy woman wasn't upset, but I still felt guilty in case I might have made her feel awkward, if you know what I mean. Then I felt awkward too. Sometimes I wish I was semi-oblivious to other people's feelings so that I could wade through life more confidentally.

except for places like Silicon Valley where being aspie is a definite advantage, I seriously doubt there is any meaningful increase in actual Auties/Aspies, merely an increase in ASDs _DIAGNOSED_.

I just hate having AS, nobody cares, nobody understands, I express my feelings far too much, I always wish I were an emotionless Aspie, not one that's full of emotions. I'm just here to exist and piss people off.

I don't exactly have time for self pity; I have too much going on to be worried about my Autism and how much it affects me. I've accepted myself the way I am, and moved on.

I think, threadmaster, that for the most part wrongplanet is just a place where people come to voice questions and comments about certain aspects of life, with people who understand what its like, instead of talking to NTs who can only hazard guesses.

Pretty much this. I don't pity myself for having Asperger's Syndrome. Not at all. It's how I am, it's not going to go away, and I won't sit around and whine about it because it won't do me any good. Actually I have come to believe it is a gift from God to have this condition, to be honest, for various spiritual reasons. Yes, it can be irritating or (insert negative emotion)ing to have Asperger's at times. It can be frustrating and painful. Some days are better than others because having a gift like this also means there are challenges that come along with it.

I am thrilled to have found this forum because there are people with my condition who can understand problems that come with the condition like lack of understanding from "normal" people. Example: My own father refuses to understand or acknowledge my Asperger's - do you know how much that hurts me inside? I know there are people here that DO know how much it hurts and who can sympathize with my frustration in trying to deal with him and who could even give me advice from their own experiences with such people, etc.

I haven't been registered here long but I haven't really seen anyone pitying themselves. I am sure they are here somewhere but they don't seem to be a majority. And so what if some Aspies DO pity themselves? It is be a challenging condition that few "normal" people understand. No Aspie is the same and not everyone is going to feel about the same way about the condition. Obviously not everyone who has the disorder thinks of it as a gift like I do, but who I am to judge them if they do or do not? Everyone is entitled to their own emotions and feelings imo.

It's probably dependant on the individual Autist's experience. If you've been abused throughout your life due to your eccentricities, there's a good chance you will struggle to accept yourself. The depression, low self esteem and anxiety that results from such maltreatment can really do a number on the abused's mental and physical health. I, personally, have felt dead since my late teen years. I wish I could shake off the emptiness and embrace my "weakness", but any positive energy I attempt to muster up inside is destroyed by countless terrible memories of failures, social and otherwise, from the present, and from my past.