Do your NT siblings display Autistic Traits?

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My brother likes everything to be a certain way (including food, clothes and routines), displays OCD-like behavior such as a preoccupation with cleanliness, and will watch the same movies and TV shows over and over. He also has interests that are unusual for his age, such as black and white movies and music from the early to mid 1900s.

However, I know that he probably doesn't have Asperger's because he is extremely in tune to other people's feelings and can read body language and facial expressions like a book. He would make an extremely effective psychologist, and more or less acts as one for nearly everyone in his social sphere (including and especially me!)

I have a perfect sister too. She was the "golden child". Only aspie trait I can think of would be strong/repetitive interest in certain book series, which IIRC Tony Attwood mentions in his book. Plus some brothers with ADHD, one of whom has strong interests.

Yeah, to varying degrees. I'm one of six.

My brother always had an intense interest in construction, planning, and design, beginning with Legos. He'd work hours at a time and sometimes build picture-perfect structures 6 feet long or displays that took up most of his room. Seems like it could potentially have fit under the category of special interests.

Same! Well, they're open to it, but they've seen my ten years of trying to get help and I think they're less sure that they'd be any better off with outside help than how they're doing on their own.

Honestly, I don't think there are many NTs in our extended family, and certainly none in our immediate family. Our ways of coping with our AS/ADHD traits are by no means uniform and it's interesting to see how the younger siblings learn from the older ones which adaptive traits work well and which don't.

The awesome bit about having a family where AS/ADHD stuff is pretty much the norm is that we were never shamed for how our brains work, we had each other as friends regardless of other situations, and our parents modeled and taught many coping skills that they aren't even aware are coping skills. The less awesome bit is that I have a really difficult time connecting with NTs on any deep level (at best, we both see each other as pretty alien insects), I have missed diagnoses (and potential help) because the damaging effects of shame are often part of the diagnostic criteria, I never had a lot of stuff (mostly regarding somewhat complex executive functioning) modeled effectively or consistently, and when ADHD/AS self-help books suggest getting an NT friend or family member to help out, I have none to turn to, despite having a solid core group of both family and friends.

Idahorose, your description of your brother is interesting. I know I have long had a passion for psychology/neuroscience/how humans interact and I've known other Aspie people who've also spent a good deal of time reading about human social interaction (including microexpressions, body language, etc.). I think diagnostics often overlook how strong/obsessive interests can INCLUDE interests in the systems/patterns of human emotions/interactions/expressions. Not saying that's the case for your brother, but when you talk about him reading those things "like a book" it reminds me of some Aspie people...