What is the definition of your own world?

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double post, i do apologise.

It is my own way of thinking.

In my world, when I am alone and not entertaining memories of the outside world or social interactions with others, my world is free of judgmentalism. I have no interest in belief systems and concepts such as worth and worthlessness. I care mostly for spending time doing things I am passionate about whilst I am alive and able. I don't care what that says about my worth as a human being. I am just not interested in such ways of thinking. If I meet a human being I don't think about them in terms of being worthy...I think about whether I like their company.

When I am in my own world I am perfectly fine with being me doing whatever I happen to be doing at any moment in time, provided I am not hurting anybody or causing harm or doing anything dangerous. There is no pressure, no expectations to live up to, no problems (provided I have my fascinations, warmth, food and shelter...the basics I need), no squabbles, no drama, no good, no bad (just those things that cause more harm than others and so on).

In my own world it is peaceful and free from human/societal belief systems and troubles other than basic survival 101 (food, shelter, warmth, fascinations).

The only thing it can be marred by is a loneliness. I seek someone with a similar way of thinking to me. I feel very alone as I seem to be the only human alive who actually doesn't care to measure things in terms of worth or worthless, good or bad, superior or inferior. I don't care for perfect but I do appreciate beauty (beauty and perfection are not always the same thing).

I have lost my patience with human troubles.

Many of them are self created by the things they choose to believe.

When I die I won't care about what my worth was as a human being, I will care more about having had the chance to spend my life doing things and spending time with people I enjoy. I want happy memories to guide me on my way when I am passing...

My world, therefore, is peaceful, passionate but lonely.

To me it means the person is not attentive or interacting with others when he/she is in their own world. Like if I talk to them and they say nonsense back. Most people are like that sometimes, but not too bad. My first son does that a lot. Although I suspect it wouldn't seem that way if he doesn't talk so much. He jabbers all the time randomly it's pretty obvious that he's not focusing on the present.

I actually can't be "in my own world" when there are other people around. I can't focus on my own thoughts. I need a lot of private time to be happy.

A psychiatrist once asked me to describe how I felt growing up as a child:

I told him it was like standing in a hole in the ground, just wide enough for me to fit down inside without my shoulders touching.

And the hole was deep enough that it was just higher than my eyes.

And I could hear everything that was said around me.

But I could never "see" what was happening.

I still think this.

denny

A place where I feel totally safe and can exert at least a little bit of control over what happens and when.