Do you tell people you're an Aspie?
I'm not diagnosed and don't really want to be for fear of what I'll say to people or how I might act afterwards. Will I be more of a jerk because I have an excuse for my behavior?
Anyways, I'm convinced I have Aspergers and there are a few people I would be willing to tell; but what about when I'm in my awkward social situations and feel the need to explain why I am the way I am? If you do tell people, do they treat you differently? I want to be looked at like a normal person instead of a weirdo but I don't want pity.
Your experiences?
Trouble is, Asperger's still isn't common knowledge, so saying, "Sorry I did that, but I have Asperger's" isn't guaranteed to bring understanding, and saying, "you know, like Sheldon on Big Bang Theory" won't be much better (as an aside, can I say how much I HATE that he's the de facto poster child for Asperger's?).
To answer your question, I don't tell people I have it, because I'm confident enough in my social skills that I don't feel the need to explain myself.
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Urg, I can't stand that show @_@ even though I'm a huge nerd. But I do watch Parenthood and I always figured Max was the poster child but BBT is a lot more popular I'm sure. Anywayyys, I feel like my social skills have become better with age, but that's because I have children and have had jobs and went through college so I don't have a choice but to try to act normal. Plus my college experience was in a program (dental hygiene) where I was stuck with the same 20+ people for 2 years (specifically girls, which I don't really identify with) and I felt like I needed to act somewhat normal so I tended to be myself but kind of mimic what others talked about/way of speech/etc.
I tell family and friends, and anyone I choose who doesn't hold any legal or professional authority over me. In other words, I don't disclose if I have legal or professional reasons not to do so.
But, when I do, I also use the Sheldon comparison. It seems to work best.
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Diagnosed in 2015 with ASD Level 1 by the University of Utah Health Care Autism Spectrum Disorder Clinic using the ADOS-2 Module 4 assessment instrument [11/30] -- Screened in 2014 with ASD by using the University of Cambridge Autism Research Centre AQ (Adult) [43/50]; EQ-60 for adults [11/80]; FQ [43/135]; SQ (Adult) [130/150] self-reported screening inventories -- Assessed since 1978 with an estimated IQ [≈145] by several clinicians -- Contact on WrongPlanet.net by private message (PM)
Butterfiend
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Out if all the people I've ever told, I have only one friend who has almost completely understood/cared. I don't tell people much anymore because I'm tired of things like "HE HAS ASS IN HIS BURGERS!". We walk a lonely road....
_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 61 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
AQ Score:44
Feel free to PM me for any reason at all. I like to talk to people online.
"I do not know what I am, and soon it may not matter." -Mewtwo.
"Time passes, people move. Like a river’s flow, it never ends." - Sheik
"I'm not popular enough to be different." -Homer Simpson
I've only really told doctors and other people who need to know. My family know and a couple of friends, but I don't tend to tell people unless they need to know, or it comes up and is relevant.
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Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly...
I'm currently trying to decide how to handle disclosing also. I'm self diagnosed (which i am totally fine with, but i know other people like to have validation from a professional, which is fine too) but it's frustrating when people won't take you seriously if you haven't been assessed by somebody.
I personally just want to go on facebook and come out of the aspergers closet, because i'm just worn out and tired of pretending to be someone i'm just neurologically not. I'm not too worried about losing friends or being judged, i have such a small social life that i don't think it would impact me much if backlash even occured at all. I just don't like the thought of spending more days, weeks, months, years, hiding my natural authentic self. My family and close friends have been very accepting when i brought it up with them, which was great.
Not everyone is an autism expert, so i think if i do decide to be brave and bare my soul to everybody i'll have to say something like "aspergers is a form of autism, and it's different for each person, but for me it looks like this..." and give some examples of what i deal with and what the main struggles are for me.
For me personally i don't really see any disadvantages to disclose my aspergers, but i know that's not necessarily true for everybody. use your judgment and do what feels right for you.. everyone's journey is unique!
I generally only tell those whom I deem it necessary to know (profs at uni) and one person in my family. I think that once I tell someone my dx, that they will start to treat me differently. If I have a socially awkward moment or faux pas, then I just forget about it and continue on with my life. Everyone is awkward sometimes.
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--Nyx-- What an astonishing thing a book is. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you... Carl Sagan
I don't tell people about my autism diagnosis because I don't think that diagnosis is too accurate. I do have some aspie-like features like special interests or sensory issues when I'm sick. I don't think I'm socially like an aspie. I think my social problems are caused by ADHD and social isolation.
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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical
Not too many people beyond my family who I have AS, but I think that's more of an unintentional thing rather than anything. I can fake NT enough to skate by on the surface. But I think if I did a mass post of Facebook, or some other impersonal medium, it would go right over their heads. And, in most cases, I doubt that people would treat me differently--rather, I think they wouldn't care at all.
The trick, I think, is to find one or two people you can trust, write out a list of symptoms and how they apply to you, and hand it to that person (I'm strongly considering doing this with someone I know at work, just so I can breathe more easily and not feel as though my behavior is misjudged).
Butterfiend
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That's my life in a nutshell.
_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 61 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
AQ Score:44
Feel free to PM me for any reason at all. I like to talk to people online.
"I do not know what I am, and soon it may not matter." -Mewtwo.
"Time passes, people move. Like a river’s flow, it never ends." - Sheik
"I'm not popular enough to be different." -Homer Simpson
That's my life in a nutshell.
I agree with both of you. I don't have friends really and my only family is my husband's and I know for sure they don't understand me at all and mistake what I do/say for rudeness I think. I wonder if I tell acquaintances at church if they'll understand me a little better. I'm not overly social and we run out as soon as service as over so they probably think I'm rude too and I don't mean to come off that way but I don't really know what else to do.
nick007
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In the area I'm from there is little knowledge about Aspergers & even the so-called "experts" think it's like a less sever form of mental retardation so I think telling people would just confuse them.
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"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
"Hear all, trust nothing"
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition
I was diagnosed 20 yrs ago. I suffered a head injury 15 yrs ago. Because of this I can't tell if my autism or my brain damage is why my behaviors are the way they are. One day ago I decided to tell some of my co workers that I'm on the high end of the autism spectrum.
I told them because everyone including myself have been laid off and I will not be working with them anymore. They did not really respond to it, so I guess it really doesn't matter to most people.
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"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."
- Edgar Allan Poe -
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