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NTs have ruined the word "introvert"

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Rocket123
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21 Oct 2015, 9:40 am

QuiversWhiskers wrote:
It's like introverts usually come away from social interactions or from being with people and end up tired, exhausted, in shutdown, or meltdown, or feeling sick even though they weren't horribly miserable while out with the people. It's like an energy drain. You don't feel able to do much of anything else outside your normal routine or solitary activities or nothing at all.

Extroverts go out with people and when it's over they are usually "energized" from it: feel empowered, want to do more, feel like they could do anything at the time. I am not an extrovert but this is what I imagine extroverts might experience from my occasional experiences of not feeling drained (physically empty) and worn out after being out with people.

What about those who feel "drained" during social interactions (for me, I have a hard time figuring out what to say to others -- and oftentimes just follow the conversation while remaining silent), but afterwards, feel "energized" (having survived it).



QuiversWhiskers
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21 Oct 2015, 4:12 pm

Rocket123 wrote:
QuiversWhiskers wrote:
It's like introverts usually come away from social interactions or from being with people and end up tired, exhausted, in shutdown, or meltdown, or feeling sick even though they weren't horribly miserable while out with the people. It's like an energy drain. You don't feel able to do much of anything else outside your normal routine or solitary activities or nothing at all.

Extroverts go out with people and when it's over they are usually "energized" from it: feel empowered, want to do more, feel like they could do anything at the time. I am not an extrovert but this is what I imagine extroverts might experience from my occasional experiences of not feeling drained (physically empty) and worn out after being out with people.

What about those who feel "drained" during social interactions (for me, I have a hard time figuring out what to say to others -- and oftentimes just follow the conversation while remaining silent), but afterwards, feel "energized" (having survived it).


I have that too. I think it's still part of introversion mixed with ASD stuff.



InquisitiveCat01
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22 Oct 2015, 12:22 am

I consider myself a shy extrovert. I get energized by being around people, as long as I like them and get along with them, but it takes me a while to open up and be myself, especially since I know I'm perceived as 'odd.' I do tend to 'shutdown' if I'm out with people for a long time though, but I only need 10-20 minutes and I'm ok again. My problem is that I also can't understand situations and struggle to make sense of social stuff, even if I like the people I'm with - and people doubt I'm on the spectrum lol.



Apple_in_my_Eye
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22 Oct 2015, 2:13 am

"Introvert equals boring" sounds like an keep extrovert's definition of "introvert."



DevilKisses
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22 Oct 2015, 4:14 am

InquisitiveCat01 wrote:
I consider myself a shy extrovert. I get energized by being around people, as long as I like them and get along with them, but it takes me a while to open up and be myself, especially since I know I'm perceived as 'odd.' I do tend to 'shutdown' if I'm out with people for a long time though, but I only need 10-20 minutes and I'm ok again. My problem is that I also can't understand situations and struggle to make sense of social stuff, even if I like the people I'm with - and people doubt I'm on the spectrum lol.

I'm like this when I feel healthy. Since I'm sick and depressed right now a lot of stuff makes me feel drained. That makes it hard to know if I'm introverted or not, which is another reason I avoid calling myself an introvert or extrovert. When I feel extroverted I find it way easier to pick up on social cues and socialize. That makes me doubt I'm truly on the spectrum as well.


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underwater
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22 Oct 2015, 6:37 am

I remember taking a personality test that said I was a mix of introvert/extrovert. Now I just think I'm an extrovert aspie.

The fascinating thing is that it seems impossible for most people to make a distinction between sensitivity and introversion. I see a lot of people now defining themselves as HSPs, and when they go on to list a bunch of traits, what they are describing is introversion, not being HSP.

I almost killed myself laughing when I saw an article in a national newspaper where someone lamented that all of society was now being designed for extroverts. I live in one of the most introverted cultures on this planet, silent and strong is the socially acceptable thing.



BenReilly
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23 Oct 2015, 2:36 am

EzraS wrote:
Introverted sounds derogatory to me. I would rather use a term like wallflower.


LOL



eric76
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23 Oct 2015, 2:39 am

Marvin_the_Martian wrote:
Merriam Webster defines an introvert as someone who is shy and quiet and does not find it easy to talk to other people.


That's pretty much how I would define it. I don't see why it would matter whether or not dealing with others was draining.



TwilightReader100
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23 Oct 2015, 10:24 pm

For reading about this topic, I liked "Party of One: The Loners Manifesto" by Anneli Rufus. I thought she did some very good research.



marshall
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23 Oct 2015, 10:34 pm

Marvin_the_Martian wrote:
Merriam Webster defines an introvert as someone who is shy and quiet and does not find it easy to talk to other people.

Well, I don't like that definition because it includes the word "shy". "shy" implies there is an element of fear or timidness that prevents the introvert from socializing. That simply isn't the case most of the time. Even if there is that element, it isn't really the primary reason for being introverted. The real reason introverts are quiet is because they don't enjoy talking as much as extroverts. That's all it is. The social anxiety is something that comes secondary. It's caused by our societies non-accepting attitude towards quiet people. Shyness is secondary and learned. Introversion is primary and probably genetic.



marshall
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23 Oct 2015, 10:43 pm

The "boring" connotation is annoying too. Maybe an introvert finds parties boring. But maybe they like other types of excitement, like adventures or thrill activities. Maybe party people who are afraid to climb mountains, race boats, or go sky diving are boring. All they do is stand around and talk about television shows or trivial nonsense. Talk about boring.



naturalplastic
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24 Oct 2015, 8:36 am

I am sure there are extroverts on the web who whine about how society as 'ruined the word extrovert' by making it into a synonym for 'vapid', 'shallow', 'iliterate', and a 'sheeple'!

It prolly all balances out. So I wouldnt dwell on it.



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24 Oct 2015, 3:00 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
I am sure there are extroverts on the web who whine about how society as 'ruined the word extrovert' by making it into a synonym for 'vapid', 'shallow', 'iliterate', and a 'sheeple'!

It prolly all balances out. So I wouldnt dwell on it.

I guess it is like that. I've met some boring and shallow extroverts, but I've met some really interesting ones as well. They actually made it easier for me to socialize because there was never an awkward moment and I actually gained energy around them.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical