What NT accepted behaviour flumoxes you the most?

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To answer the question: Small talk. More correctly, how natural it is for them to engage in it and how apprehensive they are of those who don't participate, or participate incorrectly.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to being polite and going through the social script for the sake of being nice and demonstrating that I have no ill will.

But I remember sitting in a diner once, by myself, waiting for my order and listening to the waitress make small talk with the patrons at another table (in this case, an aging couple). The three of them all spoke about nothing in particular so naturally that I realized I'd NEVER be able to fake it and make it seem as natural as it was to them.

I remember the old lady saying something like, "Oh, this must be a big month for birthdays, so many of my friends are having their birthdays this month."

"Ah, yes," said the waitress, "My daughter has her birthday in a couple of days, she's gonna be 20, seems like yesterday she was born,"

"Oh, come now," said the old man, "You're much too young to have a daughter THAT old,"

"Well, it's amazing how time flies," said the waitress...

I remember thinking that the conversation itself seemed so asinine and superfluous to me, but the flow was so natural between the three of them (and I'm assuming all three were NT). But even if I WANTED to go through all of that mindless fluff, I'd never be able to do it and make it sound natural. I usually tune out other people's conversations, but this instance of eavesdropping really made me see just how natural and normal it is for them to interact like this and how utterly impossible it is for me to try to even attempt to fake it.

And many of them find it unacceptable when someone cannot/does not make such small talk acceptably.

Re: Small talk. A few times, I have been able to follow casual conversation very closely, sort of like watching a speed chess match yet having time for a few guesses at how it will go. I noticed that every speaker, although parroting common phrases, had some leeway in which to select, and the listeners also had options on how to interpret it and respond. Thus they negotiated a relationship, establishing dominance and scouting out taboo topics, etc. without actually raising the issues openly.
I also had a ride sitting between a bickering couple. For a whole hour, whatever each one said, trying to smooth things over, the other would somehow take the wrong way, and then have a shot at being the peacemaker themselves. They both looked pretty shot by the time we got home.

High-Fives.... can't stand them, can't figure out their reason, and find NTs looking ridiculous doing them.

Why do they need to clap their hands in the air when they finish, or accomplish something? It seems like it makes them even more happy! When someone tries to high-five me, I just don't acknowledge, and they get frustrated... I just tell them that I don't do that, they look at me perplexed, and quickly look around for someone else to indulge them, as if they need and crave the validation.

How sometimes NTs use strong words , and make the statement misleading and vague, without "lying"

For example, when they say "may I help you?". They act like they dragged my worthless corpse out of a burning building



How they say "can you" , as if , if you "can", you have to

How they say "sorry", for sympathy and apologies. That way "sorry" means nothing

How they act like questions are morally superior to statements

How they seem to become friends so quickly having just met.

2 people I work with spoke at the gym the first time, by the end of the session they were like lifelong buddies, and of the day they agreed to meet up for drinks at the weekend.

They just met!! ! It takes me ages to be comfortable with people.

How "I like your jacket" is a compliment and you have to say "thank you", but you did not see the jacket, and the speaker did not "help" you.

How precious lil "people" ask "how are you doing?", But there are five emotions and happy is just one of them

How precious lil "people" have the nerve to remark "pull up your pants", because of course, I "hurt" their eyeballs, and hurting people is a Mandated Reporter violation.


How they act like every thought and emotion that goes through their head, is the latest greatest scientific invention. But their vocabulary is stuck on "help", "hurt", " most people" , "respect", "rude" , "mean", dispositional versus situational, "do you have a question" "may I help you", "are you ok" , "why", "what", "huh", "unfortunately,", "sucks", "cool"


They act like they have a moral entitlement to whatever they want, immediately. Pedestrian, driver, toilet


Some self important lil riffraff had the nerve to correctly tell me that he turned on the hand dryer in the bathroom, ( as if to "help" me) (no no no. No). (too loud), and I would rather turn it on (or not turn it on) myself

At least I don't call every non-Aspie "precious li'l peolple" like it's a sarcastic way of saying "I hate all non-Aspies".

I'll never understand the complicated psychology project that is courting a woman. I'll never understand why they display such cognitive dissonance in every aspect of their lives. They want to be treated kindly, but also poorly. They want all the power a man has in the workplace; but they want a man to have all the power in the bedroom. They want a nice guy who's also a mean guy. They want all the advantages of being a man with none of the disadvantages; and they want all the advantages of being a woman, with none of the disadvantages. They want equal pay; yet they want a man who makes more and can provide for them. They are put on a pedestal, protected from harm and revered as the gatekeepers of our species; yet they cry victim and complain about their perceived oppression. I'll never understand how men have literally EVERY statistical disadvantage in life, yet they still try to push this notion of a 'patriarchy' and 'male privilege.'

I'll never understand how there are thousands upon thousands of articles, books, etc. explaining to guys how to get a girl, but there are seriously NO articles explaining to girls how to get a guy... probably because she already has five of them vying for her attention as I type this up. I'll never understand why women don't realize how good they have it in 2018 and there is still this thing they call 'feminism.'

Whoops; got a little political there.

The relevance of the last couple of posts to the topic is what exactly???

Lets all stick to bashing NTs!..

I mean....commenting upon the 98 percent of folks who are NT.

And stop hijacking the thread to attack the fifty percent who are of a particular gender.

Take your rant to the Loath and Hating (love and dating) forum please.