Alienation

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I don't mean to. It's not done on purpose, but it's true nonetheless that I put people off.

Don't think so, but will a hug help cheer up your day?

Virtual hugs are fine. Thank you.

Good.

I have found many reasons that put people off.

Speaking honestly
In a feeling based society truth is offensive.

Speaking intelligently
Many see intelligence in others as being just as offensive to them as someone being tall. (the feeling based society again)

Non-conforming
many people achieve a reduction in anxiety as long as they are doing the same things as everyone else. Encountering someone who is not so inclined can upset them.

Perhaps the biggest offense that others have with me is my being a Christian and not hiding it.

I am not at all bothered by being rejected by those who take offense with me. I can understand that I am rejected and why. I am old enough to have seen society grow less and less tolerant of those who are different. For me, attempting to solicit the approval of others is not worth the effort.

In my brief social encounters I try to be kind and tolerant. Occasionally I will run into someone with whom I can converse briefly without triggering a hostile response.

My experience has been that people tend to prefer it If I admit to struggling at something. Showing I'm not a total idiot, just below par at a lot of things,is a definite response killer.

So...if you confess that you have trouble with something folks then tolerate it- if its an issue in the moment?

'Do I look good in this ?' tends to get a better response than 'look folks, I did well at this' . Yet both are fuelled by insecurity.

The former asks how they feel.

The latter tells them how you feel, without asking. It can come off as bragging, depending on context and delivery.

being an Aspie all by itself has seemed to make others feel alienated,or seemingly cause others to be responding poorly. In a manner that might be alienating to a Aspie? .

But in order to preserve, what little ego, i have left . i pretend to myself that i do not suffer dummies very well . ...Unless they appear friendly , but am very careful now about people.

A Hugg is offered to ((Firemonkey))

Thank you for the hug. The impression I'm getting , not from you but from others, is that it's a social faux pas to admit to being good/ having done well at something . Even if it's a small oasis of ability in a vast desert of ineptitude. That's really put a dampener on my mood. I readily admit that at a surface level it can seem like 'bragging' but in reality it's driven by the insecurity caused by bullying related trauma. The bullying that had me labelled as ugly and a rather 'dumb f**k.The bullying that drove a psychological wrecking ball through whatever self confidence, self esteem and self worth that I had.The insecurity is every bit as genuine as someone asking 'Do I look good in this?'