Made the mistake of telling a relative

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milly
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01 Oct 2024, 12:58 pm

I made the mistake of telling a relative I got diagnosed with autism. My mum was casually talking about someone (not in a good way) with them, and they immediately jumped to the conclusion that said person “must be autistic”. If they hear of someone doing something bad, the relative immediately has to jump to this conclusion. I’ve overheard them several times now. Just makes me feel they don't like me that much.



SocOfAutism
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01 Oct 2024, 1:52 pm

You know what? Don't say it's a mistake. Why should you have to sit about and listen to the microagressions? Be like, YES. I'm an AUTIST (or whatever word you prefer). AND.

With someone who matters in an authority position, like a boss, I do still say use extreme caution with disclosing. But don't let your relatives rule over you. Respect them but also expect them to respect you as well.



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01 Oct 2024, 11:50 pm

I made the mistake of telling my Nana the Christmas that I was 15 years old. She told me that I was just a little bit slow. That's not something that you say to a teenager.


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01 Oct 2024, 11:59 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I made the mistake of telling my Nana the Christmas that I was 15 years old. She told me that I was just a little bit slow. That's not something that you say to a teenager.


My dad had a elementary teacher tell his mom (a substitute teacher who sometimes was at that school) that she thought my dad was a bit ret*d.

Although, (when telling the story) he's also said she might be right (especially given the understandings and vocabulary of the time). :skull:

Do you think your nana was trying to be mean, or trying to be comforting?

I'm sorry she said that though, even if you pick it apart critically it's not something you say to a teenager (and you don't expect teenagers to critically pick something like that apart).


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CockneyRebel
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02 Oct 2024, 8:11 pm

I think my Nana was trying to be comforting.


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03 Oct 2024, 5:16 am

I would rather my friends and relatives though of me as merely 'eccentric' with a few nerdy hobbies then as . . . well, lets just say that most of my relatives have negative opinions about people with emotional, mental, or physical disabilities, and that they say some nasty things about those people.

To get an idea of some of the things they would say, watch the movie 'Slingblade' (1996), and note what the Doyle Hargraves character had to say about people like Karl Childers.