Nicknames - can't do them

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@Fern Nice topic, thank you.

I've been interested to read all your reactions here.

I don not use any true 'nicknames' but also do not mind them.(with the caveat that they cannot be denigrating in nature).
I do have an issue with remembering people's names, my job bring me many new a faces and names on a daily basis and as such I do not internalize them and usually call people 'Maestro' or 'Maestra'. This has for me a truly dual function in that it covers my inability to recall the person's name, but at the same time, with & word I indicate to them that I see them as capable autonomous adults who are 'in charge of their own internal concert'

Kind regards
Kada

I normally go by my full name, but because both my first and last names are very long I've had a few shortened forms and nicknames over the years. I use a shortened form to avoid having to answer the question about how it is pronounced.

I prefer the shortened, familiar form of my forename to the full "Sunday" version because the full version is what authority figures prefer and the shortened form feels less formal and more friendly and human. I prefer to talk with everybody as if we're all human beings. My parents never called me by the shortened form, and I didn't mind till I was a bit older.

When I gave my shortened name to an official at an airport she said "that's not what it says on your documents" as if I'd done something wrong. I thought that was a bit too fussy. It's blindingly obvious the two forms are interchangeable. Maybe she was joking, but airport officials don't often joke. Anyway I didn't comment because I didn't want to wind her up and risk a damaging attack.

I've had a few nicknames in my time - one was created by a teacher as a put-down. The kids picked it up but I decided I didn't like it and I killed it off just by telling a couple of them not to use it. Looking back, I'm surprised I got away with that, but I guess they were fairly nice kids at that school. I created my own nickname in the next school, which (obviously) I liked, and it stuck quite well among my friends. I felt it sounded a bit cool and sexy, and at that age I needed a bit of reassurance about that.

After I'd grown up a bit I dropped that and went on to use the short form of my name. That school had had the archaic habit of calling us by our surnames, so we all did that to begin with but as we got older and more rebellious we started using forenames to refer to each other, though the teachers only recognised our surnames.

In my first workplace they all called me by the long form of my forename, and I was there for a long time. I didn't particularly resent it, and never tried to get them to use anything else. Then some jerk of a boss perverted it to something a bit pejorative, and I didn't like that, but tolerated it rather than fall into the trap of objecting it and encouraging him to do it all the more. But my workmates and the head of department stuck to the proper forename except for the occasional bit of harmless teasing.

When I got my next job I introduced myself with my shortened forename, and that was the end of the long form and nicknames, except for an authoritarian manager who always stuck to the long form. We hated each other. Anyway it's been shortened forename ever since, and everybody accepts and uses it except for my sister who says she can never accept anything but the long form. So I oblige her and always sign off my emails with the long form, just to keep her happy. I also use the long form for all important official bureaucratic stuff to avoid any confusion of the kind that could cause me problems, though I'd rather not.

I was surprised to see that a group of slightly younger people I hung about with a long time ago all had pejorative names for each other. I guess that was all part of the psychology of young people insulting each other to somehow help the bonding, but when one of them tried to spread a pejorative for me he didn't get far, I'm glad to say. I always saw him as rather inferior to me, and he was never really a match for me in terms of strength of personality, so I didn't feel it was appropriate for him to be disrespectful like that. I was very confident in those days, and probably a bit bossy in an informal kind of way. I just ignored his nickname and it soon died. I got more egalitarian as I grew up.

Crikey, I've written an essay.

I am normally called the shortened version of my full name Magdalena - just Magda. But I HATE being called Madzia, it's a very affectionate and cute version of my name used typically in reference to young children I hated this even when I actually was a young child.

I forgot to mention that a coworker sometimes called me White & Nerdy. It's a song by Weird Al Yankovic & I am a big Weird Al fan so I didn't really mind but I think I'm much more of a d0rK than a nerd. Pasted link to vid https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9qYF9D ... rt_radio=1

Names are a lifelong special interest. I have big opinions about nicknames. Apparently, the OP's general experience is that when she gives her full name to new people, they ask if they can call her an abbreviation or shorter version. WHY, WHY, WHYYYYY?

If someone tells me his name is Dominic, I'm going to acknowledge that and then move on to whatever's next. If I need to use his name to get his attention, I'm going to say "Hey Dominic." I'm not going to at any point ask if he prefers "Dom" or "Nick."

If he then says, "Oh, call me Nick; I prefer that," then I'll call him Nick.

Likewise, if I'm introduced to Alexandra, I'm not going to then ask, "Do you prefer Allie, Lexie, Sandy?" Jeez. Her name is ALEXANDRA. Unless she introducers herself otherwise, that's what I'm going to call her unless she says, "But you can call me Alex.

What drives me bananas is why do people name their daughter Sophia but then never use that name ever again because they always call her Sophie? WTF.

People keep trying to give me nicknames, but they don't ever stick since I'm so particular about limiting the exposure of people I know to each other. It kind of just smothers any nicknames that would develop. At one point, I counted up a literal couple dozen things that people had tried to call me over the years, a few of them were variations on my actual name, but people seem to really want me to have a nickname.

My name can be broken down so many ways that I don't even care

I hate it when people asked me what version would I prefer

I don't even consider it to be my name to be honest because it was changed from my original name at such an age that it has very little value to me apart from that it's quite a nice name

Many years ago and long before the internet a particular person did used to call me "the girl with no name"
I don't think he ever actually knew my name so that's probably where he got that nickname from

I knew his name