Are you really autistic? my thoughts on this

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I knew this would get a lot of you to read. Well...I have noticed some recent threads that seem to be questioning our legitimacy of being under the autism spectrum. One even suggested that some autistics choose to be autistic. In this thread, I will be using the term autism/autistic to represent all of us under the spectrum---including Asperger's.

I want to first ask a serious question. Why would we choose to say we are autistic if we are not? Even though I, and many others here, boast about positives of autism, we do know that a lot of the public's perception of autism is far from favorable. Someone suggested that we might fake autism in order to get attention. Hmm...think about that one. Let us assume that I want attention (actually I don't like attention---it bothers me---I would rather hide in the corner---I bet many of you feel that way too) why would we be here? If we wanted attention why wouldn't we be out in the physical public eye rather than logged in here for hours every day? What possible attention can we get out of the WrongPlanet? All people see here is typed text and perhaps a copy/paste photo. Wow! Some attention. If I wanted the kind of attention that that post suggested I wouldn't be spending my time in here. Let me be honest, the WrongPlanet is my social life. So why am I here? I am here because I like the support of fellow autistics. I like to share with you things about my life, and have you share with me. I believe that that is the basis for the WrongPlanet---so that we can understand ourselves better through relating with each other. Can you think of why anyone would want to do this if they weren't autistic? I know that some here are not autistic as they have stated in their profiles---such as family member with autism, or undiagnosed, or just plain interested in autism. I truly believe that if a person was pretending to be autistic just to be posting on WrongPlanet, they would quickly become bored and move on to some other website. Look at many of us---we have been here for awhile. I still feel new since I have only been a member for a little over a year. Some of you have been here much longer. But still, I have over 2000 posts (not many compared to some) and that is a lot of time behind this keyboard. I am addicted here---because as one person said, perhaps we autistics flock together. I have never been able to relate so well to my life than I have with the discussions of you people here at the WrongPlanet. This place is like an owner's manual to my life. I will be forever grateful to Alex, the moderators, and all of you that are members of this website that post in appropriate manners (and most of you do).

Autism is a tricky thing. You don't take a blood test and have a big plus sign appear in the window of the test kit reading, "You are autistic!" We don't have physical attributes that signals to the world "This is what autism looks like!" And to complicate autism even more---no two autistics are alike. Some of you like socializing, and some of us don't. Some of us have sensory issues, and some of you don't. Some of us like our autism, and some of you don't. We are all so different. So what is autism if it can't be defined simply? Autism is a difference (in my opinion). Autism is a syndrome---that is a manifestation of a combination of different traits/issues/etc. that when enough of them are present we are classified as autistic. It is not some disease. It is this presence of things under the diagnostic criteria that shows us we have it---or we don't have it.

Many of you do show confusion about truly knowing if you have autism or not. Even though you have examined your life in relation to the DSM-IV, the Gilliberg, the...whatever else, you have found yourself to be autistic, not autistic, or in-between. Even though I was professionally diagnosed, many of you have self-diagnosed. Who better to know ourselves than we ourselves. We lived our life---no professional lived our life. We know the issues we have. We can feel the social awkwardness. We feel sensory issues. We stim---ohhhh...you should see my hands from the years of hand/finger flapping---not a pretty sight. We know the trouble of eye contact---from my therapy I now have the "Aspie Stare."

So...why are we here at the WrongPlanet (minus any trolls or the occasional trouble makers that plague all sites with posts)? We are here for the following reasons in my opinion:

*We are autistic and find comfort here...we learn here...we rant here...we ask for help here...we flock together here...etc.

*We are interested in autism (this is where those who are not autistic fit in---such as family member with autism) and want to learn more about this interesting condition. It's where some of you are here just to learn more about this thing called autism that much of the world is uneducated on. It isn't just Autism 101, it is also Advanced Autism post graduate classes. There are great in-depth discussions here.

*We are here to discover the presence of autism in our lives (also for those not sure if they are autistic or not). By sharing experiences we often compare and contrast our lives with each other. We often find an understanding as to why we behave and perceive the world in the ways that we do. We learn that there are others that take things literally and find challenges with figurative language.

*And many other reasons.

Wow!! ! This is a complex place. It would be difficult to pretend to be autistic or have a genuine interest in autism and post the way we do if we are simply faking autism or wanting attention. And let's look at something else---our childhoods. These autistic symptoms that we discuss endessly here didn't just appear yesterday (figurative language here ). These symptoms have been with us since we were crawling.

So...you know what I think? For those of you that say you are autistic, I believe you. I do not doubt your testimonies in life and how autism has affected you. I see a genuine beauty here at the WrongPlanet---a place where we come to feel the comfort of belonging---belonging to a place to understand ourselves a little better. A place to say "Hi" to our internet neighbors around the world and say, "I understand you...and I hope you understand me." This is where we learn and play a few games. This is where we rant, and this is where we discuss the latest news. This is where we discover ourselves more deeply than we ever have before. And---this is where we should trust each other .

Thank you for reading this post. And please believe in yourself. If nothing else fits your life any better than the criteria for autism---then you must be autistic---you shouldn't have to question it any more. Relax with yourself. Enjoy life.

glider18

I come here because it's the most active aspie forum out there. The rest are dead or not very active.

Thank you for that post, Glider. You do great service to this forum.

As I understand it, the purpose of these forums is, at least in part, is serve as SUPPORT for those on the autistic spectrum. As such, I question whether this is the appropriate place for these threads suggesting that AS, or some of those posting on this site, are shams. While the threads don't bother me personally in the least, I notice that they distress (quite understandably and as I would expect) some members who are struggling with various issues.

As with you, I can't imagine people coming here and falsely claiming to have AS in order to have a "social life". On the contrary, people seem to me to be very honest about their problems and condition.

Well said, glider18
I think I "knew" I was somewhere on the spectrum before I had ever heard of Asperger's. I may not be diagnosable as far as impairment level, but you will not convince me my brain isn't wired differently than the average NT. I have been the way I am for as long as I can remember. I can't remember not feeling detached on some level and wondering why everybody else automatically got things that I didn't. I kept waiting for people to tell me the secret. To find Wrong Planet and to discover there were people out there that thought like me and experienced things like I did was indescribable. I literally cried. This place is my social life too. It's really helped me a lot being here. There are difficult things about being as we are and once you get a little older and accept yourself more, you can find the wonderful stuff too. Well, I'm rambling. But thanks glider18.

i know many reasons why people wish to be on the spectrum. i'm not gunna bother going into it because nobody will give a hoot and just argue.

but i know it is a desireable thing for many people, they feel it holds answers. thhey think they have an ASD, but they do not. they choose to say they're autistic when they're not cause they think that they are and the believe they are. and nobody, not even the most qualified specialist can convince them differently. AS IS THEIR ANSWER and they will not let it go.

I've read the whole thing. I'm sort of tired (keep staying up late at night again), so it's a bit hard to concentrate for me, but I agree with what you've said above.

Here's my take on this: There are no definite criteria for a certain label on the spectrum, but the whole point of this forum is to offer support and guidance. It doesn't matter where on the spectrum we lie; the point is, we all have many things in common. It's alright to have neurotypicals here as long as they are sympathetic without criticising anyone in a disrespectful manner. The labels "autism" or "Asperger's" are simply there to help bring like-minded people together. This, I believe, is the sole purpose of this forum. When people mention the name of their condition, it is not for others to judge but rather for others to help understand their problems and to offer any advice accordingly.

While I find it annoying sometimes when people self-diagnose over the Internet and then walk around telling everyone how they have this condition, a forum like this can help them figure out where they belong (if they even care about it so much that they are willing to explore it further). If they just want to use Asperger's or whatever else as an excuse, or have really convinced themselves that they have it, then they are most likely not going to come to this forum. Because if they are so convinced of themselves having it, they will avoid anything that contradicts their decision.

In addition, some people who have been diagnosed with an autism spectrum condition might question their diagnosis and come here in order to help them figure out whether they have really been diagnosed by mistake.

very cool glider! idk if this is off another post idk, but i see everybody on here as autistic, if ur their not idk ur it to me ur postin on an autistic forum haha. i come on here cuz well everybody can here relate to me and relate to what i say, if i say i peed on the floor today would anybody be like ewwwwwwww what is wrong with u, nahh im sure somebody on thsi board has been where i am or is where i am haha, i had to go everybody was in the bathroom so i let it rip lol it was cleaned up, thank gosh for green haha. Its not something i recommend or am proud of, i couldnt control it. But the fact is, this board is for autistics or/anybody who relates to autism so way or another. So either way good point glider hehe

Only the person would know if that is the truth---and I am not in the position to judge them and neither is anyone else. I know that I am autistic. And I believe that those here who say they are autistic are autistic. I did not look for AS in order to fit into something. I had never even heard of AS until late last year. I sought professional diagnosis by being truthful with the professional and myself---and I was clearly diagnosed with AS on the DSM-IV and the Gilliberg. Then I went on a journey to see if there was anything else that I might be confusing AS with. I analyzed and discussed these things with my professional and he went over all of this with me and said, "It is of my opinion that you have AS---and that is my diagnosis---you are diagnosed with AS." So that's it---I have AS. And even then, I questioned and analyzed just to make sure I had the right diagnosis. Now, I know. After comparing and contrasting data and charts and tests and etc. I know that AS is my diagnosis.

And now for another of my thoughts on some of us that are autistic (not all autistics do this). If you have studied and analyzed and compared and contrasted and scrutinized and read and read and read about autism to see if you are autistic---then I believe that is a good indicator of autism. That just seems to be something that we do.



This is the journey that we have taken. It is a journey of truth. We know our truths---and no one else can answer that for us.

Last edited by glider18 on 01 Dec 2009, 11:26 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I question whether the people who discredit the self-diagnosed have a sincere opinion on the matter. I don't see how they can possibly deduce over the internet whether someone who self-diagnoses is or isn't on the autism spectrum. It seems more like a tactic that's employed with only one purpose, to invalidate/insult people, e.g. "you're not autistic, you're just a loser/failure/whatever". In reality they don't have a clue. I don't think it's worth it to worry over what people's opinions are when they're just flinging them around like mud without any real investment of thought.

It's not important to me if people are on the spectrum or not.. or if they believe if I am. Most seem honest and I feel comfortable here. Maybe it's just misery loves company.

That's what the doctors said.

I'd much rather them say I was a gorilla. I like gorillas. I don't like autism.

well in years to come and there is a brainscan type test that can be performed to determine with 100% accuracy whether or not someone is on the spectrum and you take that test and the results said that there's no possibility that you could have an ASD. then what would you know?? you couldn't still know you had an ASD, but you are still the same....even though you are not on the spectrum.

(this isn't actually about you sepcifically, just a general thing using you cause i'm talking to you).



but i have KNOWN people who have done this and they were wrong. one person tried to commit suicide after being denied a diagnosis. he felt like he had finally found his place in the world and then it was ripped away. even though he has been officially diagnosed with a different condition now, he still participates in the AS group for self-diagnosed adults at my work because he clearly benefits from doing so.



unfortunately that doesn't mean anything. i know ALOT of about autistics (not so much autism, but autistics). i see things posted around this place which are totally ludicrous. stupid even. they go against everything i KNOW about people with autism. but i keep my mouth shut because the truth i KNOW is my truth and nobody gives a toss about it and in fact, i will be attacked for DARING to share my experiences with out documentation to back up my life. people refuse to accept my truth, even though i know it is, but it does not fit with their truth. same as your truth, it's acceptable to you, but don't sit around waiting for everyone to support you and pat you on the back.

I like this post.

i just wanted to add. i don't want to be upsetting to you glider.

you are my favorite poster here. and you are my 3rd favorite member overall.

If such a brain scan exist, and it was available at an affordable price, I would likely undergo the test anonymously and see if the result come up NT. If that were the case, I would then retake it at another location under my original name and get my label removed. I could then be able to have many more choices in health insurance, etc. I could also have the medical alert taken off my drivers license.

I can also understand why some people are suspicious of the self diagnosed. There are fakers out there, and they are also those who genuinely believe they are autistic (or have other conditions) but have incorrectly diagnosed themselves. I don't necessarily trust a professional diagnosis without question either. Before being diagnosed as being autistic, I was first diagnosed by several professionals as "severely mentally ret*d." These same professionals also recommended that I be institutionalized. I was not yet 3 years old, and the so called professionals were willing to condemn me to a life in an institution. Due to my mom's occupation, I am around speech pathologists, social workers, and other therapists. I opened up and stated that I was autistic, and each and every one of them stated that they either knew or suspected that. While these people do not have the power to make a diagnosis in many areas, they do work around autistic people. No matter how NT I try to act, they almost always see through my act in a very short period of time.

As far as self diagnosis is concerned, I think in a majority of cases, it is a valid procedure as long as it is based upon thoughtful interspection and careful research. I think that people (with or without diagnostic powers) who work around or with autistic people can be a valuable resource when making a self diagnosis. People who know me on these forums know that I am generally against adults getting an official diagnosis attached to their name unless they need it for a specific benefit. Such benefits include government benefits (in places these are available), accommodation at work or college, or as a person who wants to take a position as an autistic advocate. What is wrong with accepting a self diagnosed person who states that they are autistic if they do so with a sincere belief? Even if they are wrong, what is the harm of letting them being included in our community? Most of us here have experienced being an outcast. It is not fun, and I wouldn't want to do it to someone else even if he or she has a different condition than me.

I think it would be a good idea to start a forum here dedicated to helping people gain a true self diagnosis. Such a forum should include information such as online autism tests, places where people work with a wide range of autistic people, information on other conditions that may mimic one or more autistic traits, and any other information that may point people to a correct diagnosis even if it is not autism. Meanwhile, I will enjoy the online company of people who come here who think they are autistic whether they are NT, professionally diagnosed, self diagnosed, suspect they have it, etc. Of course, I welcome people who are NT and are interested in autism for whatever reason as well. I don't want to offend or upset anyone. I just want to provoke though on this subject.

Last edited by cyberscan on 02 Dec 2009, 12:46 am, edited 2 times in total.

So "they" (who?) think they have autism, but you obviously know better. Who are "they", and how do you know for a fact that "they" aren't on the spectrum when they themselves aren't 100% sure?