28 years old and never had a driver's license.

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Never had a real girlfriend either, but that's a seperate matter.

Well, I never even got as far as the driving test phase.

If nobody else is on the road, I can get the car up to 40 mph and not roll into a ditch. Providing I don't have to make any left turns.

That's as far as I got. Beyond that, I get overwhelmed (sensory overload? Bad motor skills?) and freak out. When you're behind the wheel of a two ton death machine, that's not good.

What can I do? Who can help me? What can be done?

I'm from Los Angeles, 99% of my kin is in California, and I'm currently in Las Vegas. Where I'm from, it isn't like New York or London where having a car is optional. For instance, if I went back to L.A. to work and my job was in downtown, I'd either have to live in a real bad ghetto to be close to work, or I'd have to put up with a two hour commute one-way (if I lived near the part where I grew up). Three or four hours if I had to dork around on two or three different buses after stepping off the heavy-rail commuter train. By car, downtown was half an hour off from where I lived.

I heard about this thing in Huntington Beach (Orange County, CA) where they have this virtual reality chamber to treat phobias without putting you in physical danger. They have a program for driving phobias. Anybody know anything about it? Would that help an Aspie like me, or would it only work with a normal phobia?

Okay not factoring fear I break my driver problem down into two units:

1) I have inattentive ADHD (rather daydream than do any thing) . So I do not
focus on the road.

2) Gross motor skills/ dyspraxia are bad (but better as I get older). Driving a standard
for example is out of the question.

I first drove by myself at 34. I drove about 3000 miles and crashed . The crash had
nothing to do with skill. I was driving on a dirt road in the middle of no where very
fast and got into a deep mud rut and lost control and flipped 3 times and the suv
was upside down. Not drove since much at all. I never got a real permit to drive either.

A medical way would be for me to take ADHD meds focus on the road.

Try having somebody drive you out to the sticks, and practice there. Nobody is good in traffic when they first start.

That's as far as I got.

Although it was with my dad.

My dad's a high-ranking cop used to ordering other cops around.

He would go ape-sh** every time, scream and yell, cuss me out, threaten... which would make me freak out twice as bad.

I mean, the moment I showed signs of getting nervous "g-d dammit, don't even think about turning p*ssy on me again... g-d DAMMIT!! !" And that alone could cause me to freak out and lose control... and he'd grab the steering wheel and I'd be in very deep doo-doo.

Everyone said he was the wrong man for the job.

He's a great dad, despite his rough manner. But others have said that he can't teach a person like me how to drive.

I had the same problems as you with family trying to teach me to drive.

They usually forced me to try and they did provide extreme negative feedback "
.... you could have killed someone......" etc

Another problem is I had no feel for the peddels. I ask my sister could I take my shoes off. she said it not legal. Well I never read such a thing!

Anyway I learned on my own driving at night on back roads (at first with no shoes)
driving an automatic (my first try was 13 in a standard 64 chevy truck). My coworker
drove with me one night to give me pointers he basically said I drive good and most his
advice was how I needed to drive defencively. I slowly over a few months drove every kinda of condition. But I never tried to parrell park,

Your local county courthouse, which I assume is humongous because it's Las Vegas baby, may have a department where you can apply for a free driving course. I've had some minor driving issues in the past and almost came close to having to get this course required. I know a physics student with a phobia of driving who just got his license...if that serves any inspiration to you. Getting a license is mind-numbingly simple at our courthouse in rural middle-of-nowhere. The line was very short. Unsteretypical I know. Then again half the people on the road where I live probably are without license anyway due to their, ahem, undocumented immigrant status. Don't know how the laws are in Nevada, but here, it's just walk in, show some proof of identity, take a driving test out on the roads, sit back down, and if you passed, you get to get your pic taken and you get a temporary license that day and a permanent license in a month in the mail.

If it makes you feel any better, my dad's pushing 60 and has wrecked two cars in the process of learning to drive. He's probably an Aspie too.

I heard aspies are better drivers then woman, but not as good NT males. But they are safer drivers them both of them.

Well that kind of personality sux for helping peeps like us. Maybe you could have somebody else help you..

And I dont think driving is that hard. Even people with poor motor skills can do it, with practice.

I'm 29 and have never had a driver's license.

I'm 33 and unfortunately have never had a driver's license and even at times the thought of driving makes me feel anxious and nervous.

I got my license at 23 in a state where most get it at 16, I never felt comfortable driving and still I will not drive on highways. I just drive short distances for errands.

Most of my previous workmate secretly thought that I was too ret*d to be able to drive. Most reaction I get is you got a car! I didn’t know that you even had a licence. I didn’t remember telling them that I didn’t either.

If any of you are worried about driving, get an automatic first them manual when you get used to driving.

All is not lost ! I was 35 before I passed the test. My parents didn't drive so I was at a
disadvantage to begin with.Had all the usual problems of being nervous and feeling
I didn't belong behind the wheel. Failed 3 times and gave up for a while.I got by using the train but then my work moved to an office in the 'middle of nowhere' and the situation pushed me into taking up driving again.Something I found helpful was to learn as much as I could about how the basic mechanics worked and that way it made me feel like I was
more in control,e.g. when I pressed the accelerator pedal I was aware that more fuel and
air was thus being supplied to the engine.Previously it was just a case of 'Ok,I press this
pedal with my right foot' and I thought of it more as some kind of dance rather than
actually having control of what was happening.
I still can't say I really enjoy driving but like to thing I'm safe and competent ! Hope things
work out for you whatever happens

Told it before, tell it again: took my license at 18, the earliest age you can take it in this country. Had to go through 35 lessons of driving and about 10 of theory. Flunked on the first driving test but succeeded on the first theoretical test.

I consider myself a pretty good driver, though feed a couple of times due to violation of the speed limits etc.

The bad drivers are usually not the ones who drive fast, even of some bad drivers of course drive too fast as well, most dangerous drivers are the ones who lack attention, and they can be NT as well as AS.