Realizing sensory issues are making them worse?

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Embla
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06 Nov 2017, 9:33 am

Hello everyone.
So, I just got diagnosed a few months ago, and before I realized that I'm autistic, I didn't know what was causing me so much anxiety. I thought that the meltdowns caused by overstimulation was panic attacks that just came out of nowhere. All I knew was that I felt weird and needed to sit in a small dark space.
Now, it's very obvious that light, sound and people are what is causing my problems. Knowing this has made it all a lot easier to handle, but it has a backside too.
It is as if knowing what is causing the problem is making it even bigger. I am more annoyed by light than ever, I notice sounds more, crowds are even more unpleasant, etc.
I'm not sure if this is only because it's a stressful time for me right now, or if I'm actually just as affected as before, just knowing where to focus the annoyance. But it sure does seem like these problems are getting worse, just from realizing that they are problems.

Has anyone else experienced exaggerated symptoms/sensory issues after realizing what they are?
Any tips and tricks on how to deal with it? Or do I just have to wait for it to sink in?

Thanks y'all!

Embla



Tresmantra
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06 Nov 2017, 10:25 am

Hi, Embla.

I'm in the same boat as you. For light: I have to remove all but one light in the bathroom because I can't stand how bright it is. In a classroom, I love when the teacher decides to dim the lights or show a movie. I just...f*****g hate bright lights. And whoodathunk, college is filled with rooms where I have to sit in a crowded room next to another person. Oh, I have to small talk with you about mundane topics? Woohoo! Sorry for the rant.

There are times when I do want a bright light, such as when I'm studying. Never when reading a book for fun, though. I remember now so many times when someone said something like, "How can you read when it's so dark?"

My best advice: If you're particularly good at preparing, write scripts (either physical or mental) for future scenarios. If you're worried about being "detected," try to observe how other people act without care (lucky bastards--they're so ignorant of how easy it is for them) and try to imitate that behavior. Eventually, though, I've found out that there's only a certain threshold, a limit, for how long I can pretend. Eventually, I might expose myself just to get rid of those feelings.

Best of luck out there! -Michael



shortfatbalduglyman
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06 Nov 2017, 2:00 pm

Embla

Yes

Exactly

When I was 21 I got diagnosed

And I read a lot of books about autism

But they did not put too much emphasis on sensory overload

But, especially since I started Wrong Planet, hearing feels way too sensitive

Like bathroom hand dryers and strangers talking too much and too loud

Which is legal, normal, and common

And I can't do anything about it, short of avoiding them

It is so inconvenient sometimes. Like avoiding bathrooms that have blow dryers

And lately even hearing the toilet flush is too loud



thebelgradebelief
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06 Nov 2017, 2:53 pm

I can relate your post strongly. I keep thinking I'm faking it, but when I end up having a shutdown due to over-stimulation, I know that I can't be completely deluding myself. I think it's the realization that what we experience isn't how everyone else experiences senses.


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LostGirI
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06 Nov 2017, 4:09 pm

I can relate to this post myself. I only got diagnosed a few months ago. I think the difference between now and then is that before I wasn't exactly sure what was driving me nuts and making me agitated and snappy, other than any kind of noise. I knew I found lights a bit uncomfortable but just tended to have them off at home and keep turning them off at work any opportunity I got (and the radio too!). But now I know about the sensory overload I would say in some cases it is worse yes. Definitely with the lights anyway. Before diagnosis I would just put up with the bright lights at my parent's or my (ex)boyfriends but once I got my diagnosis I think I became more self aware or the things that do get to me and put me on edge, make me uncomfortable and snappy with people etc. And I guess it has helped me accept some of these things and know it is okay and there is nothing wrong with me so I feel more confident to ask or to speak up, or my mum will ask me if it's okay to turn the lights on, or do I want them off etc. I think basically, it's a case of more self awareness. You know what is going to set you off and be bad for you (potentially harmful) so you are more alert to it I suppose and notice it more, if that makes sense. That's my take on it anyway.

I also relate to what somebody else said about just pretending and imitating people, although there does come a time when you just can't pretend anymore and it all comes out. I'm well and truly at that stage myself and have burnt myself out somewhat for pretending for so long, so just be careful


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Kiriae
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06 Nov 2017, 5:51 pm

Yes. I experienced the same thing a few months after adult diagnosis. It is common.

There is scientific/psychological explanation for it - the more you pay attention to something the more it bothers you. Even normal people can get sensory overload symptoms just by paying attention to distractions. They might not realize some background sounds etc. till pointed out but once they actually heard something they have a hard time ignoring it and it will bother them till they forget about it or manage to focus on something else.

You are reading about symptoms and look for examples in your own life. Therefore you are conditioning yourself to pay more attention to the symptoms. Before diagnosis you wouldn't pay that much attention to some bothering sound etc.- you would habitually use any coping mechanism you learned during lifetime and ignore it, the best you could. But currently you are focusing on observing your reactions and the reasons for them, preventing your brain from using the habitual copy mechanisms.

Also the knowledge that other people don't experience what you do and probably considering it unfair doesn't help with ignoring the issues. "Why do I have to accommodate to the world? Why doesn't the world accommodate to me for once? I was doing it the whole life! I am sick of it!" - that kind of thinking causes emotional reaction to unpleasant sensations you considered an unavoidable part of life before diagnosis. Emotions are also a factor increasing attention.



SaveFerris
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06 Nov 2017, 6:46 pm

Kiriae wrote:
Yes. I experienced the same thing a few months after adult diagnosis. It is common.

There is scientific/psychological explanation for it - the more you pay attention to something the more it bothers you. Even normal people can get sensory overload symptoms just by paying attention to distractions. They might not realize some background sounds etc. till pointed out but once they actually heard something they have a hard time ignoring it and it will bother them till they forget about it or manage to focus on something else.

You are reading about symptoms and look for examples in your own life. Therefore you are conditioning yourself to pay more attention to the symptoms. Before diagnosis you wouldn't pay that much attention to some bothering sound etc.- you would habitually use any coping mechanism you learned during lifetime and ignore it, the best you could. But currently you are focusing on observing your reactions and the reasons for them, preventing your brain from using the habitual copy mechanisms.

Also the knowledge that other people don't experience what you do and probably considering it unfair doesn't help with ignoring the issues. "Why do I have to accommodate to the world? Why doesn't the world accommodate to me for once? I was doing it the whole life! I am sick of it!" - that kind of thinking causes emotional reaction to unpleasant sensations you considered an unavoidable part of life before diagnosis. Emotions are also a factor increasing attention.


That's a very informative post Kiriae , I never suspected autism but since reading about it it feels like it's made me more autistic ( I am waiting for an assessment so it could all be in my head ) , like thebelgradebelief I feel like I'm faking it or making it up.


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magz
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07 Nov 2017, 4:34 am

My therapist says I show AS and HSP traits. Some of them a bit cancel out (I learned to employ my sensitivity to process social life) but they both make me prone to sensory overload.
I'm quite sure the overloads got worse since I learned about it. I used to deal with them by denying and ignoring (everyone is ok, why should I feel bad? So I forced myself not to feel bad) to the point I imploded. Now I stopped it and did not find a new strategy to deal with them. The world is too noisy and too full of information to deal with. My own body is too noisy and too full of information.
I hope it would get better over time.


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Embla
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07 Nov 2017, 5:03 am

SaveFerris wrote:
Kiriae wrote:
Yes. I experienced the same thing a few months after adult diagnosis. It is common.

There is scientific/psychological explanation for it - the more you pay attention to something the more it bothers you. Even normal people can get sensory overload symptoms just by paying attention to distractions. They might not realize some background sounds etc. till pointed out but once they actually heard something they have a hard time ignoring it and it will bother them till they forget about it or manage to focus on something else.

You are reading about symptoms and look for examples in your own life. Therefore you are conditioning yourself to pay more attention to the symptoms. Before diagnosis you wouldn't pay that much attention to some bothering sound etc.- you would habitually use any coping mechanism you learned during lifetime and ignore it, the best you could. But currently you are focusing on observing your reactions and the reasons for them, preventing your brain from using the habitual copy mechanisms.

Also the knowledge that other people don't experience what you do and probably considering it unfair doesn't help with ignoring the issues. "Why do I have to accommodate to the world? Why doesn't the world accommodate to me for once? I was doing it the whole life! I am sick of it!" - that kind of thinking causes emotional reaction to unpleasant sensations you considered an unavoidable part of life before diagnosis. Emotions are also a factor increasing attention.


That's a very informative post Kiriae , I never suspected autism but since reading about it it feels like it's made me more autistic ( I am waiting for an assessment so it could all be in my head ) , like thebelgradebelief I feel like I'm faking it or making it up.



I agree. That's a really great explanation. Thanks for taking the time to write that Kiriae!

SaveFerris, I had the exact same thought. That I somehow got more autistic just from learning about it.
I sometimes feel like I'm making it all up, or suffering from placebo-symptoms. Even questioning whether or not I really told the truth during my assessment.

It's very relieving to learn that I'm not the only one experiencing this.
When I thought that I only had anxiety and depression, people used to say that "there are many who have these conditions, just knowing that you're not alone will make you feel better". It never did.
But this time, it really does help knowing that others feel the same. I take it as a good insurance for this not being something that I'm making up.

Thank you so much everyone!



elbowgrease
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07 Nov 2017, 12:53 pm

I can relate.
It's all still really new for me. I figured out last February that I'm on the spectrum and only got a diagnosis last week.
Have wondered and worried since February how much is exaggerating and how much may be me trying to tear down walls I've put up throughout my life in an effort to blend in.
I think I will gradually find a balance that works for me.



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07 Nov 2017, 12:59 pm

Me too. I love to sit quietly alone in dark rooms. Sanctuary. Nts find my habit peculiar at best. I live with my parents & they often ask if I can see or if I need a lamp.



LostGirI
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07 Nov 2017, 1:26 pm

hobojungle wrote:
Me too. I love to sit quietly alone in dark rooms. Sanctuary. Nts find my habit peculiar at best. I live with my parents & they often ask if I can see or if I need a lamp.


Me too - not completely darkened but dark enough. I remember being asked those questions too and at work sometimes people comment. It's such a joy to have my own place. A sanctuary indeed :heart:


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07 Nov 2017, 1:54 pm

It's useful to know that some environments are harmful for you.
However, concentrating on negative side of something always makes it worse.

You should first accept that a sensory issue may happen.
Then look for and create the environment you like, which suits you, as much as possible.

This helped me.



Embla
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07 Nov 2017, 3:56 pm

LostGirI wrote:
hobojungle wrote:
Me too. I love to sit quietly alone in dark rooms. Sanctuary. Nts find my habit peculiar at best. I live with my parents & they often ask if I can see or if I need a lamp.


Me too - not completely darkened but dark enough. I remember being asked those questions too and at work sometimes people comment. It's such a joy to have my own place. A sanctuary indeed :heart:


I'm just realizing now how many times someone has asked me about turning the lights on. I never connected that to anything.
Oh all the things that suddenly make sense. Like why I never stored anything in my school-locker, so there would be room enough for me to lock myself in it. I spent a lot of time in there and didn't even know why. Seems kinda obvious now, don't it?



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08 Nov 2017, 8:16 am

Imagine walking around in your bare feet and your feet are really uncomfortable. They are painful. You have dealt with this so long(all of your life) that it's become part of you. You don't understand why you get the pain and the anxiety that come with it. You got to see someone about your painful feet and they tell your your feet are painful as you are walking around barefoot, while everyone else has shoes. Now you are really aware of the fact of your bare feet everywhere. Some terrains make it more painful,others less. So you try and avoid some places,but walking being part of life you can't stop doing it completely. You become aware of all the terrains that make it more or less painful,where as before it was just pain for no reason. You develop are very nuanced understanding of your pain,where it happens,when,how etc and you focus on it a lot. So now have dozens of scenarios,triggers,etc about your pain...you seem to have become more sensitive, but in reality you haven't, its because you have become aware of it and it's many nuances. Attention bias :)



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08 Nov 2017, 7:53 pm

TheAvenger161173 wrote:
Imagine walking around in your bare feet and your feet are really uncomfortable. They are painful. You have dealt with this so long(all of your life) that it's become part of you. You don't understand why you get the pain and the anxiety that come with it. You got to see someone about your painful feet and they tell your your feet are painful as you are walking around barefoot, while everyone else has shoes. Now you are really aware of the fact of your bare feet everywhere. Some terrains make it more painful,others less. So you try and avoid some places,but walking being part of life you can't stop doing it completely. You become aware of all the terrains that make it more or less painful,where as before it was just pain for no reason. You develop are very nuanced understanding of your pain,where it happens,when,how etc and you focus on it a lot. So now have dozens of scenarios,triggers,etc about your pain...you seem to have become more sensitive, but in reality you haven't, its because you have become aware of it and it's many nuances. Attention bias :)


I love ( not real love ) this ^^^^


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