Meltdown

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I keep seeing this word in posts. What exactly do people here mean by it?

a meltdown is an autistic condition that results in extreme anger outbursts and or agitation and other symptoms...

And what do you do when you "meltdown"? For instance when I get bombarded with too much sensory stimuli I get really agitated. Yesterday I thought I was going to punch the wall I was so mad, and just left work early. Usually I just leave the situation and walk around until I'm calmer. I don't think that's what people mean when they say meltdown here. It sounds like a tantrum?

As in "Nuclear meltdown" with temperature analogous to anger.

It's basically an emotional breakdown. All of your stress, anger, and nervousness just comes out and it's not very pleasant for other people to be around.

Meltdowns means lot of things. With me, I get real anxious inside and I can't calm down and relax and I am unable to play my game or read my book, I pace very rapidly and I start to cry and flap my hands and I feel like screaming inside and I feel I want to get out of here. It's really embarrassing when I have it out in public. I try to hold lot of it in me and try to keep it under control. At least I don't start screaming and cursing at everyone and get real rude. When I was late for my doctor's appointment because I had slept in forgetting all about it, I didn't run in the building yelling "Out of the way I need to go first I'm late for my appointment." and shoving people out of the way and yelling at the receptionist to sign me in and let my doctor know I'm there expecting the special rule of me not having to wait in line because I was having a meltdown and have anxiety and my routine was going to be shot. I still waited in line anxiously and was in it for ten minutes and because I had missed my appointment, my doctor couldn't still see me so I had to see another one that same day and stay there for another 40 minutes to wait. It was really stressful that day and I had a breakdown in the waiting room. I felt like a real ass.

Well, it seems like ALL meltdowns come with some loss of mental ability/comfort. With what I have been calling my meltdowns, I get a bit angry, but I would normally just say ornery. It IS one of those cases where I DO sometimes laugh out loud. I mean people want me to do something but remove my ability to do it well?!?!?!? INCREDIBLE! Still, I guess externally, my presentation is not what some here would call a meltdown.

For me a meltdown is like hitting a boiling point, but its not about anger or agression. I start to feel like there is just too much going on and everything seems to escalate to unbearable levels. The lights look brighter, the noise sounds louder, and everything seems to be coming at me all at once. I can usually get away when I feel it starting so there is no problem, but if I cant or I am asked to explain why I need to go I am completely unable to function or communicate. This compounds the overwhelmed feeling and leads to a total mental breakdown, sobbing hysterics and all. At this point I will do whatever it takes to get out of there and to a safe quiet place where I can think. .

I had a meltdown recently as a result of acculuating stress, anxiety and anger which just got worse each day.

What resulted was deep depression for a few days and a near suicide attempt.

That's what's it's like for me as well.

I had the last a little over a year ago - It started at work (the cafè) I wrote about in my intro, and lasted all through the night and well into the following days.

I don't have the complete breakdown/temper tantrums that seem to be associated with meltdowns. For me, it's more that when I become overwhelmed I am no longer able to do any work, think coherently, or really do much of anything other than sit hopelessly and wish that the room around me would be quieter and stiller.

I have 3 types of "meltdowns", and the older I get the better I get at preventing all of them:
1) is the temper tantrum... sooooo humiliating
2) is the stress-out... it's all too much oh-my-god-the-world-is-going-to-end stuff. Equally humiliating
3) depression... wherein I hide like a hermit in a cave. (And I used to drink to self-medicate.)

I'm on anti-depressants now, and things are less likely to upset me, and when I do get upset, it dissipates quicker. And as part of getting older & wiser, I'm also better at catching myself just before a total meltdown, removing myself from the situation if possible, and cooling down. But once I hit that critical temperature, it's all over. Even if the voice of sanity in my head is reminding myself that I'm being really ugly and will be really embarrassed later, I can't stop it once it's boiled over. Thankfully, it gets rarer and rarer.

This is how I am. I don't feel angry, just agitated and overwhelmed.

Over the summer, I had a bit of a sunburn. It wasn't too bad, but then it just started itching terribly, and nothing would stop it. My mom did her best to help by putting whatever crap she could find on my shoulders. But her futile efforts only made the itch worse, and all her prodding started to become too much. Of course she doesn't know when it's time to stop, and for all my pleading, she couldn't just leave me be. That was one of my worst moments. Long story short, I ended up tossing a bottle of lotion at her. It wasn't that I was angry or wanted to hurt her. It was just a thoughtless act of frustration. She was okay, but of course she freaked out and thought I was attacking her. ._.

It probably doesn't help that I say mean things when I'm upset. That's not to say that I'm at all dishonest or make extraordinary claims. I just don't hold back like I usually do, and I always give honest responses. Some people can't handle my honesty.

Edit: I should add that while it was one of my worst moments, it was also highly atypical. Mostly I just become choked up with anxiety and unable to speak, doing whatever little I can to escape the situation. I was told by a psychologist that avoiding these situations is a bad thing because it makes me more sensitive to them. I guess the thing to do, then, is seek out discomfort. f**k!

I'm sorry you had such a bad one with the lotion - I know where you're coming from. For example, I once shattered a window in my sister's apartment and scared the crap out of her and embarrassed her to no end. I wasn't trying to break it, only to bang on it to make a noise to express my frustration that she wasn't listening to me - similar to your story. But our relationship has never been the same - she's always a little afraid of me now, because of my "violent" outburst, even though I never harmed nor intended to harm her.

As for seeking out discomfort, yeah, I call it growing pains - whenever I feel that I know it's time to suck it up and change, like it or not. It's worth the pain to gain the ability to cope better. No pain, no gain! But when I slip up and get to the point of no return and I'm going to meltdown, I still get the h*** out of there if at all possible - nothing good ever comes from having a meltdown, and anyone who's ever seen one of my meltdowns never has the respect or lack of fear they may have had towards me before. NT's have an amazing capacity to see the good side of you for 1,000 hours, and see a bad side for 5 minutes,and somehow think the 5 minutes is "the real you." And they NEVER forget one moment of bad behavior. NEVER. They're always a little afraid you're going to do it again, even if you think you are great friends and you go 10 years without a meltdown near them.

Meltdown to me means I have become so full of negative stimulus (I say negative because that is the effect on me though it may be a quite normal thing for an NT) that I begin to lose emotional composure.

Outbursts of uncontrolled emotion, it for me has been some anxiety coupled with either anger or sadness, the latter being much more rare.

I have gained some control over my meltdowns in the last 10-15 years (mostly in the last couple) but am still supceptable.

I have worked really hard on "disarming" them when I feel that kind of energy building. The best thing to do is to retreat away for some time and try to distract my mind from what ever negative stimulus is causing the cascade.

That is not always possible, as one can work up in minutes or months.

All I can say is they have become much less frequent over the decades.

It's like a seizure.

When you see me rocking on the spot and banging my head against stuff, there you go. Conversely, when you see me become "catatonic" and completely withdrawn, there you go again.

It's a different sensation to a panic attack due to anxiety, completely different; it's the worst feeling in the world [to me].