Message I got on a dating site

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Do you think it was fair of me to be kind of offended at this

I said that I didn't think that vaccines are responsible.



I feel kinda bad for being offended.

[sarcasm]Cuz we know doctors are ALWAYS right.[/sarcasm]

Might as well just let it go.

You had every right to be offended, as according to my own research, vaccinations don't cause autism spectgrum disorders.

show them
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/badas ... se-autism/

If I got a message like that I dunno if offended would be my reaction. I might think it was another person who believes a vaccine caused some kind of reaction and triggered autism somehow.
That might not even be autism but some strange reaction that is very, very rare and is a complication of somekind. People think it is autism when it isn't. It must be extremely rare because it doesn't happen to most. It might be a rare autoimmune reaction, not to be taken as a reason not to vaccinate though, because it is so rare, and not autism, just resembles it.

I don't know if I would be "offended". I would be annoyed that their doctors were so misinformed, though. I would be more annoyed about their situation than annoyed with them.

If I replied to something like that, I would probably sound offended; but it would definitely be something along the lines, "I can't believe your doctor doesn't know the vaccine theory's complete crap--what rock has he been hiding under for the past ten years?" I mean, maybe the doctor's a generalist who does pediatrics but doesn't specialize further; but autism is so common and so in the news that I can't imagine a decent pediatrician not taking the time to read up on this stuff.

I wonder if it was one of those DAN guys that told her that... because that's exactly what they will do, research or no research.

Autism & vaccines... no connection. Autism & the immune system--maybe a weak connection; maybe just another bad theory; maybe just the effect of a stressful life on an autistic kid's health. But we know it happens at the same rate in unvaccinated people... we know the rate didn't even blip when they took mercury out of childhood vaccinations... Heck, I've got a completely unvaccinated autistic little sister, and there's many more like her. We know that autism's genetic; we just don't know exactly how those genetics express themselves, though I am willing to bet it has to do with sensory, cognitive, and language development, especially during the language-explosion years, which, incidentally, is exactly the time when kids get a lot of vaccinations... It's a classic case of causation/correlation fallacy. People see things happening together--they automatically think "this thing causes the other thing" when it could be the other way around, or there could be a common third variable, which incidentally in this case is the child's age... People see that something makes an autistic kid more comfortable or healthier; they assume it's curing his autism when it's just freeing up enough energy to think...

I mean, I improved dramatically when I started wearing cotton and sunglasses--I stopped self-injuring, for one thing, and had fewer meltdowns--and that's no cure; it's just an adjustment to the environment... Why is it that when the adjustment is something internal, like not making a lactose-intolerant kid drink milk, that people assume it's a cure?

Argh. I cannot believe a doctor would fall for this stuff. But they do.

Anyway, there's my reaction. I'd get mad at the person's doctor, not at them.

Mis-informed maybe, but they weren't trying to be rude. I wouldn't get offended by that.

I wouldn't be offended. I would just correct them and tell them why I am right.

Well I do find it irritating when people talk about someone like they are Autism, instead of a person who has Autism.

personally I don't get offended by the lack of knowledge in other people (maybe I should...?)

he should be redirected to some autism research resources before he hits on autistic chicks though

That's interesting. Most Aspies and autistic people I know say the opposite. They say that autism/Aspergers is who they are, in the same way as they are male or female, rather than something they have, like measles. They say it is part of their identity, because it describes how their brains work and therefore it is who they are. Personally, I think it's just semantics, and I'm not bothered either way, but I was just interested because I never heard anyone say before that they prefer 'have' to 'am', with regards to autism.


In reply to the original post, I wouldn't be offended. She is simply reporting her understanding of the situation, from what the doctors have told her. And she didn't argue aggressively when you disagreed - she simply politely told you why she believed it.

If you felt offended, then that's how you felt. Your feelings are neither right nor wrong. If we have to make moral judgments about your reaction, it is your conduct we should most sensibly look to.

Your response as described was perfectly acceptable. However you felt, you responded without rudeness, and simply informed the person of the facts as you understand them. In my view there is nothing wrong with either what you felt or what you did. In fact you should be commended for your level headed response. It's not always easy to be polite when feeling offended.

Though you do have the right to be offended, mostly the only people who know about the vaccines real link with autism are autistics themselves, alot of people don't do their full research and come across such a fact like that one, and believe it, because they are not told much else.

Whether or not to be offended depends on the context.

I don't know what you say in your dating profile, but if you mentioned Autism/Asperger's, then this guy might have meant it in a "I know what Autism is, and you are not it" context. In which case, then yes, I would be offended by his small-mindedness. However, he could have meant it as a normal conversation. Misinformed, but not intending to be inflammatory.

Believe I might have been offended by the comment a month ago. Habit of seeing threats or injustices in peoples comments and taking it personally. Had a long session with my psychologist about the problem and feel I am making good progress.

Have changed my thinking somewhat towards the Vaccine-Autism link debate.

Do not feel there is suffient supporting evidence to justify a direct link.

However, infants with mild Autism(Not detected) having adverse reactions to vaccines makes common sense. People with autism appear to have extreme sensativity to enviromental and chemical factors. My own mild/severe intolerences to psychotropic medications influences my views on this issue.

The only way I would be offended is if I considered my AS as an essential part of who I am, and if I found repulsive the idea that I may have gotten it as just a medical accident. Perhaps that's why you felt offended?