People on fedaral disability: Do you tell friends or family?

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I am on federal disability and not sure if I am comfortable telling friends or family.

For those on fd, do you tell friends or family?

Why tell anyone? Would you tell people how much money you are making if you were employed and working at a job?

The only "people" who need to know your income are any social service angencies, like Medicaid, that you may be entitled to receive. That's the law.

But wouldn't you have to tell them at some point, if you socialize with them? That is, if you can't afford to go out and do the things they like to do. I know for me here in BC it's hard because the kinds of things other people do to socialize are out of my budget, and so either I act like I don't want to see them or I have to tell them it just isn't in the budget.

Beyond that, it depends on how authentic you want to be with them. If it feels wrong to say something, don't. If it feels like you're bottling it up and being dishonest, do say something.

The only people I'd be wary about telling are people I don't know very well.

Zsazsa I don't think its that easy not telling someone. The first time you meet someone one of the first things out of their mouth is "So what do you do?". If I go fill a prescription or go to doctor the employees there always ask "Where do you work?". When I visit family the first thing anyone asks is "How is work" or "What are you doing now?".

So I think Kevin has a very good question because people are judged solely by where they work. Oh and I have friends and family both all my life asking how much money I earn at every job. People are nosey and there's really no way to avoid the question. Perhaps making friends with other disabled is a good option because they won't ask you those questions.

I don't tell anyone. When they ask what a I do, I tell them my volunteer job. They don't need to know I don't get paid for it.

My family k now, and that can be uncomfortable. But they are hte only ones that know.

If people get too nosey I just walk away. It may be Aspie, but I really do it.

am on the UK equivilents [DLA,IS,sev/da,enhanced premium],and it was family who got them on behalf of am originally,do not care that dad tells everyone about it as most of the money goes on what it is designed for-towards care,a care debt and disability aids that am not able to get on NHS,people who want to assume benefits users spend it all on drugs,cigarettes and big tvs to watch jeremy kyle all day can keep assuming as couldnt care less.
most of family would never say that of anyone as there's quite a few disabled people on both dads and mums side,there's only one have ever had any problems off-a cousin who is younger,she thinks am 'spoilt'.
KevinLA,
if are given bad replies for having disability benefit,try telling them-they are welcome to it if they take the disability as well- it's used by many of the users on a disability forum am use [but usually more in reply to people who say they shouldnt be parking in disabled parking spots because they dont 'look disabled' aka have a wheel chair].

me too, to most the above.

but its pretty hard to lie to your family etc, as they do notice if you're poor. i go without food tc to buy expensive presents for christmas etc, to maintin the lie....

i dont initially 'appear' to have anything wrong with me- late dx has some advantages, as i have suppressed a lot of weird traits, so i can get away with lying to new people... when i have told people im on benifits, they have told me- there's nothing wrong with you, you're just doing it to get money so you dont hvae to work'.

i lie to my family, and say i have a good job.
at home, i dont meet people, for PRECISELY this problem- how can i see them again? even if i can afford a one off night out, i cant often, as well as i get weirder the longer you know me.
so i no longer see anyone.
when im away from home, and meet people- eg- in hitchhiking- i say i have a job.

and people really do think you spend all your money sitting about watching jeremy kyle (sub jerry springer show in which the inbred hit each othera nd screama dn shout- rather aspie, in fact).

i lie about and read angela brazil books, and beowolf, so HA! i confound them! i defy the stereotype!

Yes, they do think we like Jerry Springer.

Here is what I say to people who tihnk peple like to sit around and not work,

:When you were unemployed for more than a year, did you like to watch Jerry Springer all day?"

THey: "No, I was never off work that long...."

me: "OH, then you have NO idea what it does to you....."

THat shuts them up. Like they think everyone on Dis has no self respect but if they had a Dis THEY Would work and get around all the loopholes set in place toa ssure we can't work even if we want to try.......madness.

I tell people and I say "but I am looking for work."

I really do want to work. Just because I recieve a disability payment doesn't mean I don't want to and I am not on a payment for AS, anyway.
I have worked before. Two jobs at the same time while I was looking after my DD who has HFA.

I want a career.

I've never been on any kind of disability, but I have been unemployed for a long time. I'm just not formally recognized as "disabled."

Lots of people are short on cash. It doesn't need a long explanation.
"I'm broke" or "I can't afford it" should be enough. Why would anyone rub it in?

"So what do you do?" or "How is work" or "What are you doing now?"
Maybe you can tell them about whatever you're doing. School, volunteer work, home improvement, planting a tomato garden... If you're not doing something interesting, you should probably start something. And they're usually not listening anyway.
Or maybe you can make a joke of it (I just got out of prison? Kidnapped by aliens?) and then let the conversation shift to something else.

As for how much you're earning, That's a rude question, everywhere. I don't think my own mother has ever asked me about the exact amount. I would just give 'em the old distainful look, like "Waddya crazy?" They might hate it, but it shuts them up.

Xmas--there's a big one. I finally got up the nerve this year and spent literally NOTHING. I luckily had a leftover that was suitable for my very young niece, and everyone else is old enough and can just deal with it. This culture is crazy, and I'm crazy for letting it get to me for so long.

I can say, "Who's Jerry Springer? Oh, wait, I've heard of him -- is he the one who..." I've honestly never seen it. And I've never seen a full episode of Opra.