Anyone wish there was a book out there on normality?

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I wish there was a book about them so we could buy it and read it and understand why they are so stupid. Like how hard is it to understand basic body language like if you hug someone and they pull away, how hard is it to learn that means they don't want to be hugged, especially if they have to tell you and they still don't understand.


Or why they don't listen to the words "leave me alone" and how hard is it to understand they don't want to be bothered when they get told those words. I shouldn't have to get nasty at my bf and throw things at him to get him to listen or have to scream at the top of my lunges the neighbors call the police thinking I'm in trouble. I can get pretty bad when I get pushed over the edge. Anyone want to see the worst of me, keep pushing it till you see it.


Why do people say things they don't mean? The whole book would explain that part too. I think it be a great idea if a doctor would write a book on normality and it would help all the people out there with autism and other conditions understand them better.



Yes I know anyone can be stupid.

I think you may be confusing "normality" with being male.

Huh?



Do I have to say NT? I get so sick of that word.

Your description struck me as a description of the opposite gender, not NT's.

Ah I see. I am frustrated with my bf and I am talking to one of my aspie friends and he is saying to NTs "leave me alone" means "comfort me don't leave me" and the fact I have been told in another thread about basic body language they don't care and my aspie friend told me its not simple for them which i find hard to believe. I mean how hard is it to listen to words too like when I say "when I say leave me alone I mean leave me alone, don't talk to me." How hard is it to understand that? Geez. my bf doesn't seem he can't listen to those words and my online friend told me its not simple for NTs.

I am male, and "cuddly". If I saw my GF upset, the first thing that would come to my mind was to hug her and share her pain. This is a very, very strong instinct i assume almost on par with caring for your child (to give a female example). A "normal" person would most probably stop with the away-pushing and accept the empathy. Though if you really do the things you say you do, I'm surprised he doesn't "get it" and back off. have you tried to discuss this with him when you both are calm?

Well, I guess I can assume your original question was literal?

In any case, I´d like to answer it literally, because that was what caught my eye when I was looking through this forum. The answer is yes, I really wish someone would write a book on "normalcy"! I´ve been thinking about this a lot, actually, because if it existed, I´d go out and buy that book. There already was the book "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus", which apparently helped a lot of people with relationships (not me though, as I am not from Venus or Mars). We need a similar book explaining NTism to help us.

I had similar problems in my past relationships, of always taking words literally, as well as using them literally. At the time, I knew nothing about AS, so I wondered what was wrong with all my boyfriends that they had to engage in this crazy "doublespeak", rather than speaking (or even hearing) clearly. It´s only quite recently that I´ve even discovered that not saying what you really mean is actually "normal".

I can HIGHLY recommend 'Loving Mr Spock' by Barbara Jacobs. As an NT, she had a love affair with an Aspie. Her book is brilliant. As one on the spectrum myself, I found myself laughing, crying and sitting with my head in my hands at times!

So if you want to know what an NT thinks, try reading that. Makes a pleasant change for someone actually to understand how we tick and LIKE US!! Also this book was the launch pad for many familiar names in the autistic community. Barbara gave us the chance to speak, nice to know someone considers OUR feelings for a change!!

Hope you enjoy. Just google it on Amazon as I am not sure if I can post the link?

Thanks Jelibean, I was wondering if I should read that book...(I saw it once on Amazon, and the title jumped out at me). I never know what book is going to be good or not. But now that you recommend it, I´m going to read it.

My pleasure Morgana , I just know you will LOVE IT! There are some brilliant references in there as well as the AQ test! Sometimes it is good to thrust something in front of someone's face if you can't get them on the computer!! ! Hope you enjoy it, do let me know what you think. It has great reviews on Amazon. Truly I have read until I am RED in the face (pardon the pun!) and this is the most tender and beautiful of stories that encapsulates the wonders of the spectrum. It was particularly refreshing to see that an NT had written it. I was entranced and it actually changed my life, and that is not even a Spectrum exaggeration!! Enjoy

PS.............. have some tissues handy!! Laugh until you cry and despair too until you cry. Great read and very easy to dip in and out of although I was rivetted from start to finish. Think I saw my WHOLE family in that book! Bless em.

I think it's called "sociology". And perhaps "psychology" and "anthropology", too. And there are lots of books about it.

There actually is such a book. It's called the Bible. And the reason so many people are uncaring and mean is because of a thing called sin.

A book on "normality"?

Wouldn't that be a rather boring read?


Wouldn't it be like all the boring superfluous things they cut out of/omit from stories in order to keep the plot going?

Sort of like "The Sims" but in even more uneventful detail?

It would be cool if there was such a book, I can totally picture a book called "Normal: For Dummies" in my head, but I do think such a book would be useful.

Reminds me of a SpongeBob SquarePants episode called "Not Normal", Squidward tells SpongeBob he's not normal, so when SpongeBob tries to get normal, he watches a videotape called "How To Be Normal."

I love it! "Normal: for Dummies"! !!