This one:
MrXxx wrote:
"You have too many interests."
"You just looked me right in the eyes."
"Your speech isn't mechanical."
"You use gestures."
And many others. They ALL annoy the hell out of me.
I'm fifty one for crying out loud. These idiots have no clue what HELL I went trough to develop these skills. I didn't have any of them when I was a kid.
That's the most annoying aspect of Autism ignorance. The complete lack of awareness that we can learn to fake everything.
And this one, which I've gotten from mental health professionals more than once:
Sweetleaf wrote:
That I never have any idea what i'm talking about because I'm mentally ill.....wtf ever!
And this one, which I have gotten from medical professionals and all kinds of other people who ought to know better:
FaeryEthereal wrote:
One of the worst myths is that autistic people have no empathy!! ! They assume we are cold sociopathic unfeeling monsters, this is incorrect, insulting and dehumanizing!! !
It makes me tired. It makes me want to crawl in the closet. It makes me want to give up.
Taken together, they were enough to make me want to die. Think it was best, man. Go out and hook up a helium tank and tie a garbage bag over my head. If I could have tolerated the heat of my own breath for more than 45 seconds, I'd be dead.
I'm not dead.
I don't want to be dead any more.
But I DO want to stand on top of a mountain and SCREAM SCREAM SCREAM. I want to make like something out of a Bob Dylan song-- "I'll tell it and speak it and think it and breathe it. Reflect from the mountain so all souls can see it. Then I'll stand on the ocean until I start sinking..." "Come gather 'round people wherever you roam, and admit that the waters around you have grown, and accept it that soon you'll be drenched to the bone. If your time to you is worth savin', then you'd better start swimming or you'll sink like a stone, for the times they are a-changin.'" "The line it is drawn, the curse it is cast..."
I know my song pretty well and I'm about ready to start singing. Loudly and badly.
I think, though, that the reference to walking on water means something I don't quite get. Something about performing miracles and attaining mythologic status. Jesus Christ, Superstar. Something that ain't bloody likely to happen. On, like, a cosmic scale.
I want to SCREAM!! !!
It makes me tired.
_________________
"Alas, our dried voices when we whisper together are quiet and meaningless, as wind in dry grass, or rats' feet over broken glass in our dry cellar." --TS Eliot, "The Hollow Men"
29 Jan 2012, 9:01 pm
