Suicide as an alternative option for lifelong torment.

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God gave us free will to make our own choices. He simply knows beforehand what those choices are going to be.

But the idea of a god does not cut it for many of us. Maybe especially someone who is down and depressed. He/she needs something true and real in the sense that it can not be torn a part and lose its integrity (which sadly can be done with religion). When I was like that all the talk of religion just made my situation worse. I could not believe people was walking around being religious when they actually could come up with something that spoke to the human core of me and could help me. It made me feel even more alien.

Most of the moral regulations were developed during ancient times, when death was constant at all ages and common. Extreme uncertainty about ones lifespan was the norm. People at that time saw that suicide was wasteful because so many people died even young people. People would do everything right and even their babies would die sometimes from things nobody understood. To predict and explain events, an external locus of control was adaptive and encouraged by that environment.

Now death is a choice. When it happens is somewhat controllable. Even if someone is severely medically compromised, in the modern wealthier places life has lost its preciousness because it is ubiquitous and when threatened, the person is sometimes seen as a burden, and this is not considered morally wrong. Nothing to do with religion, though many attribute it to that. Just the perception of scarcity has changed. People can go throughout life without witnessing death and are rewarded for being "positive thinkers."
Real talk from someone that was on a feeding tube to prevent death for several yrs.

To add to Callista on page one;
You don't want to commit suicide because:
You'll miss GTAV!
You'll never know how A Song of Ice and Fire ends.
You'll never see The Hobbit trilogy.
You'll never see medicine's advancement,
You'll never see science and technology's advancement.
But most of all, your pets and family will miss you. My family genuinely needs me; I'm the oldest male and strongest person so I protect the house, I keep everyone safe and make sure my younger brother and sister are safe and happy. Even though I'm not terrifically happy a lot of the time, I'd keep on keepin' on just for everyone else's sake. That and, what a waste of guitar skill it'd be

An interesting post, about suicide.... I was thinking of doing just this. To join the army and die...... I was thinking just to go to some crazy war tourism. I can't seem to fit in this world. No matter what job I try and give 101% I always fail. When I try to improve my community as a part of a bigger whole. I fail.. School I fail. So I figure head to Uganda, and fight Kony like that biker did......rescue some kids.

Suicide can be as quick as you want it to be. There are many ways to end it all quickly, without alot of effort. Im not going into it all here though.

I hardly think that i would be considering my family if i am going to terminate my life - some of them contribute to the way i am today.

To even reach the point of considering removing yourself from the equation, you have already exhausted all the possibilities of happiness that you want in your life, as they have either failed, or basically ARE NOT AVAILABLE TO YOU.

To not feel loved, wanted, or special to someone is quite a big factor in suicide.

I think this thread would be alot shorter if people that have never considered or even attempted suicide did not post such useless bits of information as "your family will miss you" - "pull yourself together" - "your a coward if you do it" and the rather amusing "stop thinking negatively".


Side note.
I have attempted suicide 5 times. The last time i was struck by a car, and was very lucky to avoid fatal injury.
You do find something to fight for - im still looking for what i want, and even though i dont think i will find it, i have met a few people in my life that have been very encouraging. This advice wont be relevant to everyone though.

Many women don't want all that. When I met my husband he was pretty poor, not exceptionally good looking (although obviously I found him attractive but everyone has different ideas about what is attractive). Personally a criminal type would be a total turn off for me. As for the career, well nature has programmed women to look for a man that will be a good provider to ensure the survival of the babies. It's hard to go against instinct but still, many women end up with men that don't have a fabulous career or money. There wouldn't be such a thing as benefits or unemployment otherwise - and they are not all single.

You are perhaps looking in the wrong places, try some different activities and fake a bit of confidence, ensure you have done all you can to look presentable. And when you least expect it someone will come along. Look at it this way, a female your age in your situation would have a lot more to cry about because they would be just about past child-bearing age and feel that they have little value to most men therefore. Men can reproduce until the day they die, if that is what they want.

I don't see why suicide is seen as worse than killing someone else yet I hear and read that all the time...and as someone who has attempted the idea that my suicide attempt was a worse 'crime' than trying to kill someone else or succeeding at it doesn't sit well with me. I think steps should be taken to help one if they feel suicidal and all other options should be ruled out. For instance if someone is going to die a horrible slow death regardless of what is done I wouldn't see a moral issue with them committing suicide...but obviously if one is depressed and feeling hopeless and suicidal leaving them to commit suicide may not be the best thing since chances are there may be other options than suicide. I suppose I still don't see the moral issue I just see it as very sad one can be driven to suicide.

Also, sometimes I think people get too focused on what the suicidal person is taking away from everyone else....and forget that it is possible to be in so much pain and feel so hopeless suicide seems to be the only option. Essentially the 'how could they do this to me' mentality when they killed themself not that other individual......its also not helpful before the fact, because then on top of feeling horrible already then you get to feel guilty about how you might let everyone down and this and that which actually feeds the suicidal feelings because you already feel like a piece of crap and you can't even end it without doing something 'wrong' if that makes any sense.

Question is how is that sort of thing supposed to be helpful?.....I mean first it indicates the loved one felt the pain the suicidal person did which is inaccurate what they feel is the pain of losing someone not the pain that drove that person to commit suicide. I mean thats kind of like when someone says 'I understand' but they don't.

Also, I think most people are quite aware it will hurt their loved ones if they kill themself, but that does not make the pain any less unbearable. If the loved ones really want that person to stick around they should help them find reasons to live or ways to lessen the pain so that they can...rather than demanding they put their unbearable pain aside, suffer in silence and pretend to enjoy life all to keep relatives from getting sad. It sucks, its a depressing, horrible topic but suicide is also about the suicidal person not just the people who knew them. Also keeping going out of guilt doesn't exactly put that individual in a better state it just contributes further to the suicidal feelings.

I believe that too. I live with intense emotional pain everyday. I sometimes crash and can't do anything. I can't afford a consular either. I try a lot of things meditate etc… but the pain comes back shortly.

What iit comes down to for me is that once you're dead, you can't change things. As long as you are alive, you can make a difference - change your life, help someone else, save someone's life, create a painting or a book, invent something...It just seems a waste to me, to throw one's life away to no purpose. It seems selfish to me to end my life when I can still do good for others and the world.

I am not being uppity or trying to act morally superior or anything. This is the conclusion I reached during a time in my life when I was extremely depressed, and reaching this conclusion might well be why I am alive today.

Suicide is not a cowards way out. It's a finality to a lifetime of suffering.
I know death's tantalizing touch on a very intimate level.
Death is my companion every day.
I respect it and appreciate it's destructive and creative purpose.
I know I'm alive because death is always awaiting me at the next turn, should I choose to partake of that path.
I simply greet it when I wake up, talk to it as I go through my everyday functions and say goodbye to it as I pass away into my own concept of what life means to me.
Death sends me sweet dreams in return and reminds me of the bitterness that I will have to face the next day as I wake up.
I don't fear death, for I can not fear what is a part of my existence.
And so the cycle goes.

I think our culture should more openly support suicide, and make suicide an easier option and choice for people of all ages.

Anyone, at any time should be able to freely buy nembutal or another drug to easily and humanely kill themselves.

Christianity embedded in so many people this harsh shunning of suicide because Christianity is a breeder religion. Christianity relied on the principle of trying to make its followers produce as many babies as possible so that the religion had more believers. The harsh view towards suicide being bad in a religious or spiritual viewpoint comes from this.

But it's really an outdated and unnecessary thing now. We don't need to retain as many people as possible to spread some religion. People should be more supported in their choice to opt out.

I am not making this statement completely disconnected from the subject either. I once had a friend, who I felt really close to, and knew all about, and I knew his struggles and his suffering. He killed himself. My emotional response was a bit of sadness that I'll never talk to him again, but slight relief that I knew he was existing in a state of less suffering. In a way I feel better about him now, knowing that he isn't suffering.

We have constructed a culture that is not conducive to all human life, and our views on suicide should thus reflect this. If someone wants to die, they should be met with understanding, and being able to say their goodbyes to everyone from an understanding point of view.

Certainly the heroic thing to do in this state is take on the viewpoint of "I Will FIX this culture and make it better for people like me!" But not everyone is a hero, heroic 'Type A' personality is a genetic thing, if someone doesn't have those genetics, they aren't going to take on that heroic attitude. What are they supposed to suffer there whole life because culture isn't ready to provide a system that makes life enjoyable to them? That seems less humane to me, to attach a bunch of emotional baggage to someones suicide in order to try and force them to drag themselves through life.

I personally think if more people actively killed themselves, it would actually improve our culture quicker because it would more quickly and obviously highlight that there are some serious areas of our culture which need work.

As messed up as that may sound, that is how evolution occurs. The truth is, we did not grow legs because it was a 'good idea', we managed to grow legs and get out of the ocean because there were so many dead fish floating in the water that it made the environment toxic enough to cause genetic mutations, which by chance produced a mutagen that allowed one offspring to get to a less toxic environment and more readily flourish.

If you aren't living to the fullest of your life, and you have no where to go, and you aren't a hero. I am all for understanding the persons decision to opt out.

Some people may disagree with that, and it's not like if someone tells me they are suicidal I urge them to do it, in no way do I do that at all. Sometimes people get suicidal and you can clearly tell its just a rut they are in, they can get through. But I have encountered enough people where it is obvious to me, their entire life in this culture will be suffering, they have no future, no way to manage, they have been morbidly depressed for 10 years. If they recognize this, they know it, and make the decision, they should be able to get goodbye hugs, and maybe even make a ceremony out of it.

For me personally, I have chosen suicide as a way to die. Not anytime soon, maybe in another 10 years. I have a number of things I want to accomplish, and things I want to finish. I do have that sort of heroic spirit, I am going to leave behind some artifacts of my life that will make it easier for others to follow me. But after that, I know my accomplishments will just be a baby step and culture will remain relatively the same, and I will be exhausted, out of purpose, I will have no reason left to exist in this body that I feel to be so uncomfortable.

Last edited by metalab on 16 Feb 2013, 3:37 am, edited 3 times in total.

I can speak from personal experience with this that, you don't take into account the psychology of someone who has never been loved nor in intimate relations.

It's like a child never getting hugged during formative years, it changes brain physiology. The base imprints to even be able to fully enjoy something like that don't exist. It is more than just finding a woman, it requires a complete rearrangement of brain physiology to undo the damage that has been done over so many years of isolation. Someone has to take it upon themselves to heal you. At a certain point one has to come to terms with the fact that is not going to happen. Their currently formed physiology is not sufficient, their body has formed in a way that is not capable of experiencing happiness.

Our culture is unfortunately not in the business of healing one another. People are disposable in our culture. If your body by happen chance didn't come to be in perfect alignment to receive the proper neurological formation, that's really the end of it.

The fantasy that someone magickal will come about and heal them can only sustain a person for so long before it is unbearable.

I don't agree with this aspect of our culture, but this is sad sorry state of our culture. Until our culture changes, suicide should be supported and respected.

I mean do you have the resources to heal such a person? If you don't you really shouldn't assume someone else does. As sad as this is, I have come across certain females who I knew I could radically improve their condition, but my life is such a struggle just to maintain myself I have little resource to offer another in such a situation. We are all in the vice of a process that is unfortunately very unforgiving and cruel. We can potentially make strides to improve it, and believe me I am trying, but this is not going to be overnight. Our culture currently places us as disposable.

Suicide is how I am going to end my days as it is the only alternative. I have decided to stay around until my parents are gone. The only thing that will save me is if a woman who is not selfish and materialist, sexy with some youth left in her come along. People and doctors have said visit a prostitute but this is a failure because they are doing it for money. I am not whole and can't move on in life. Women like [edit: names removed by moderator for privacy reasons] have helped me decide my fate as I only have their rejections to go on. Internet sites are full of selfish women and scammers. If I meet a descent woman if one exists I can then start to feel different about myself, move on and feel excepted.

I don't want to kill myself. I had severe depression for a long time and it's only going to recur at some point. I think about suicide a lot but I still don't really want to do it.

I'm never going to live my life to the full or really be happy, but I still don't want to die. Guess my standards aren't very high.