Aspies leaving WP due to percieved "tone"

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I think a lot of the time people don't post about a problem wanting suggestions for how to solve it - I get the impression many just want sympathy or people saying they feel the same. That's the impression I often get. In that respect it would probably be useful for them to make this clear. It's as if advice is the last thing the person actually wants. I don't often post on here myself asking for actual advice - I am far more likely to post just to express my frustration or anger with a situation, to see if other people have been in similar situations.

I tend to prefer to find the solutions to problems myself as I like researching things online and finding out how systems work.

They just need to be positive and all their challenges will disappear.

Hi folks,

If you have (or develop) sensory issues relating to the tone of people's posts then it's best not to spend too much time on discussion forums in general.

I have seen people argue that AS should be available as a diagnosis to people who have literally no challenges to validate their "autistic" mindset, however diagnoses for such reasons are probably one of the worst reasons to get a diagnosis.

I recall more than one Aspie who has argued that everyone with an AS diagnosis should be able to function as well as they do and if said people with AS diagnoses do not they are being lazy and/or stubborn, playing the victim, wallowing in self-pity, and various other negative characterizations frequently used to shame people with disabilities for not being able to do everything that abled people can do.

There is also a peculiar belief that circulates around here that not having a diagnosis as a child means somehow being more capable because one has never been limited by a label. I think there is some truth to the notion that parents can be overprotective because of a label, but I think that overall, being diagnosed in childhood can and often does mean having better access to supports and services that can make dealing with school and other necessities less of a trial than it might for someone who received no diagnosis and no support. It's not always the case that getting a diagnosis helps nor does not getting a diagnosis always hinder, but I think such a generalization is largely incorrect.

Why does the "reasons for" dx influence the condition. How unscientific is that?

Ive never met anyone with "literally no challenges" to be honest NT or AS

I don't even like to post asking for advice on this or any other board. Even if I'm looking for advice and not sympathy people usually post advice that I either already tried or thought about and know won't work and then they get mad if I am unwilling or unable to follow their advice.

I went through this situation in the past with a male friend who used to talk to me online seemingly only when he wanted to have a moan about his situation in life - ie 'I've got no girlfriend, I'll never find one as no woman will ever want me' - ad infinitum, despite him having had girlfriends in the past and his last relationship having failed as he thought the girl was too over-weight and therefore didn't fancy her - and she was really pretty too!

I'd come out with different ideas for how to either solve the problem or come to terms with his current situation but none of them were ever acceptable to him and after a while I realised he didn't want a solution - he just wanted to express his feelings. The trouble is, I'm not good at endlessly saying different permutations of 'There there, I know how awful this must be for you' - it's just not me. I used to get very frustrated by it all and often end up getting annoyed with him. So I understand how frustrating it is to offer advice and have all ideas batted away as well as being on the other side of the fence and not wanting the solutions other people suggest - which is why I rarely ask for advice - I like to deal with things myself.

Last edited by nessa238 on 26 Jan 2013, 7:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

If someone has literally no challenges related to AS then they do not need a diagnosis. That is in the criteria, where it says:



If you have no clinically significant impairments, then you do not need a diagnosis.

Also, you misread my post: Someone can want a diagnosis for those reasons, and be impaired by their autism, and they can be diagnosed. If someone wants a diagnosis for identity reasons but has no autism-related impairments then they should not be diagnosed with AS, PDD-NOS, or autism. It's not the reason for a diagnosis that disqualifies, but not meeting the criteria in the first place. The idea that one deserves a diagnosis just to validate their identity is a rather entitled notion, and I do not think such diagnoses do anyone any good.

The perception and definition of "impairments" is highly changeable and highly subjective

What if someone met the criteria once but no longer does as in the person seeking "un diagnosis" in a thread here?

IMO dont let a book, a therapist, a parent, expert or anyone else tell you who you are.

I see you are pretty much using the Catherine Lord argument. Its no wonder as a group the APA think Aspies are an easy target.

I retain my view they are distinct and i have no doubt in my mind that will come clear with neuroscience not DSM

Thats just my view but getting off topic here and this thread should "set an example" lol

This is a terrible argument to base something like this on. Understanding of impairment is not quite so chaotic as you state here.



But you are arguing in favor of people seeking an expert to be told who they are.



I did not get that argument from Catherine Lord. It is simply how the criteria are written and is an opinion I've held since before I ever heard the name Catherine Lord. I find it rather amazing that the notion that "If you do not have a disorder, then you should not be diagnosed with it" is considered a bad thing.

Its a fact and FLAW in the DSM model - its highly subjective - hence i want the brain scan diag that is now possible but not available.

I am not arguing that at all - you believe in DSM bibles and "disorders" - I believe its for profit and they are pretty clueless and dangerous

Even the DSM5 book is 200 dollars!

You are so far away from what I believe its too much work for me

I didnt say you copied her did i??

Please lets not argue. If you want to PM me and argue we can. This is clearly NOT the thread

The DSM is actually based on research. It is not perfect, and it is not the be all and end all, and I have never tried to propose it was. I do not believe it is "highly subjective" either, and I think that criticism lacks verisimilitude. It is easy to be all or nothing - either it is perfectly objective or it is "highly subjective" but I actually do think that current clinical practices do not lend themselves to highly subjective judgments. If anything, having a clear set of criteria to work from helps mitigate subjectivity and inject a certain degree of objectivity into the process.

I do think that we'll see more and more movement toward neuropsychology and neurology for virtually everything in the DSM and that will indeed be an improvement on the current process. However, this does not mean the current system is completely worthless.

Based on research means almost whatever you want it to mean.

I do believe that its highly subjective - do you have a copy of 4. We will go over it. What exactly is a "deficit" or "impairment" - how is this defined or measured?

They make efforts to mitigate but they are far from sufficient imo.

Its worse than worthless - its dangerous and damaging imo

We agree to disagree on the current but look the same way - I accept that

That was the last I had to say here, because you are right that this isn't the thread.

DSM-IV does have definitions for impairment somewhere in it. I'll go look and maybe post a separate thread later on.

I will admit, I left the forum for a while because I perceived quite a bit of sexism in some of my favourite sub-forums and I do not handle sexism well.

I agree that you tend to find what you're looking for - either negative or positive. Just like in the real world.

However, I have a friend who is autistic and learning disabled. He has a hard time with spelling and has been jumped on because of this. He has decided not to participate.