Does Our Depression Come From Feeling Unloved / Shame ?

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An assessment of "objective reality," to me, is derived, mostly--in an overall sense--by experience in living in the world. Obviously, nothing is completely "objective"--ever. One should strive, in my opinion, within one's "subjective impressions," to the nearest approximation to "objective reality," however.

I take it on a "case-by-case" basis. I am not always right, obviously. Sometimes, I'm dead wrong.

But it's in the "striving," in my opinion. One should not, I believe, allow one's subjective impressions to induce one to give up on everything. There's always something which can serve to contradict/counter the reasoning behind "giving up on everything."

I would say different perspective rather than objective reality.
More like a defocus from negative emotions to focus on facts.
For eggsample, if I do an eggsperiment in which I forget to hit record on the EEG, I would have some bad feelings about that afterwards, and I could focus on them and feel bad about myself for quite awhile, perhaps a long time if I really focused on the bad feelings, or I could take a different perspective and think ok, I didn't collect any data this time due to temprorary brain malfunction, but I can schedule more eggsperiments and collect the data that I need, so it is not really so terrible and I need not feel really bad about myself, but try to remember to hit record next time.

I think this is why it's important to get some socialization. Otherwise your mind is not exposed to other points of view.

True.

But all people need the experience of feeling loved, wanted, needed. Can connection now help heal some of the wounds of life? Do people find this forum alters their experience, even in a small way?

I do hope this Forum provides people with a relief from loneliness.

I believe WrongPlanet should, to at least some extent, be a "supportive" forum. People are here to socialize--to talk to each other--to be acquaintances and friends with each other.

There should be intense discussions about pertinent subjects. I don't think people should be prevented from disagreeing with each other. Disagreeing with another person is an essential component of "real life."

There should be no insults of a personal nature, and no "hate speech."

There should exist sensitivity to individual people's situations. And a respect for "how far" a person is willing to go...in anything.

Yes, in this forum I am permitted to exist, where in the real world people often will act like I am not there because how I describe my experience seems odd to them, or what I feel, how I think, how I talk, I'm not really sure why. I just know that It seems as though sometimes, people find me too different from what they expect to want to tolerate.

If I met you in person, I know I would like you.

You too Kraftie, at least I hope so. Sometimes i wonder, who here might be a neighbor or coworker, each of us in our separate worlds. And wish for more of what is hear IRL. But I'm glad you're here, and glad WP is here

You never know what "life" has in store for us!

First of all, I did not find this to be a debate nor constructive; just a mere exchanging of comments where some, for some reason, reply to things that were not even directed at them. Also, if you do not like something, there is no need to get involved with it, in the first place. And, negativity leads to more negativity.

I think that, even if two individuals like genuinely each other, they can, of course disagree. To pretend that you agree with everything you are told just to avoid conflict, it does not bring to onself good. It is better to speak up and defend your beliefs, even if it can lead to negative consequences from the other party. That is much better than to allow yourself to feel insignificant because of not being able to express yourself.

Back to here, I do not find that anybody disagreed here. So, I find this to be unrelated.

It was very good that the user Kicker wrote all that. I had in mind to explain from the origins of word apathy and acceptance to their meanings, but because of what happened (if it was not distress, I do not know what it was), I did not think that it was a good moment for that. So, it is good that Kicker explained the whole thing in his own way. Because of this, I find it unnecessary to provide my own explanation, as well as to put the link of song in hopes the distress would go away....If it was not distress, I do not know what it was, then.


About what the user noprudden: No, I did not find any relief.... Yes, with animals (non-humans. Please note that humans are animals too). It is effortless to get along and bond with them.

Thank you, dryope. From what you've posted, you sound interesting as well.

I'm sorry for thinking it was someone else that posted this message that is actually from you, dryope.
The quote box you posted made it look like someone else posted it, and it confused me.
I know you didn't do it on purpose, I'm not accusing you or anyone here of anything.
I misread the quote box. I didn't understand it.
I'm very sorry, I did not come here intending to hurt anyone.

My only good friend in my life was my dad, and he was not around much, because of work.

Peers at school and in the neighborhood destroyed me psychologically, they gave me Body Dysmorphia, they said I had a big empty head with a skinny body, and they said I look hideous.

Later, I move to a different school with completely different people, and they called me "Alien Head" and that my head is huge like an alien's head, which was very Body Dysmorphic inducing for me, because it made me believe that I really was just some ugly freak that no one would ever like, and this affected me for most of my life.

My Body Dysmorphia is not too bad now, but it can fluctuate depending on the circumstances.
(I still hate having Pectus Excavatum, which I can only hide if I hold in my breath and flex my torso.)

People often pretended to be my friend for a short time, and then became my worst enemies for seemingly no reason.

My peers said I had no talents, that I was useless, that I will be alone for the rest of my life, they humiliated me, and they frequently framed me, slandered me, and set me up for trouble with other peers as well as authority figures. Being falsely accused is one of the worst things in the world for me. Being misunderstood is extremely painful for me. If I even watch a TV show where someone is being falsely accused or misunderstood, it drives me completely insane!!

Peers also beat me up physically many times, lots of punches in my gut, making me unable to breathe for a while. But, that was nowhere near as bad as the psychological abuse they put me through.

Sometimes people were nice to me though, it wasn't complete hell all of the time, but people rarely are nice to me, and when they were nice to me, it never led anywhere good, it never led to a decent friendship or relationship. I did have "so-called-friends" in my childhood and early adolescence, but they were all jerks that bullied me.

I had one girlfriend in my later adolescence/early adulthood, and for the few years that I was with her, there were good times and bad times, but it ended absolutely horribly, and I do not know why. I can only speculate why. She even came back to me after a couple years of complete separation, out of nowhere, and she told me that she didn't know why she left me. And, then she left me again after almost a year, and I don't know why.

I only leave my house to buy groceries, and sometimes I go for walks with my dad in places where there are not many people, and I try very hard to avoid people, or at least pretend they are not really there.
I cannot leave my house on my own, it is terrifying and potentially dangerous for me because I do not understand how to deal with difficult people. It's hard for me to even be here on wrongplanet.

But, my life is good now, I have solitary hobbies that make me happy, and the medication will no longer cease that.
As long as I stay away from people, and as long as I do not desire socialization, I feel good.
Sometimes I desire socialization, and it's very painful, but it usually goes away like bad weather.
Today was actually a great day for me, very comfortable. Friday the 13th.

I did not see anything wrong with your advice, your advice to me was good advice, and I agree with you completely.
I did not read everyone's posts here, and I got very confused when I read dryope's last post on page 2 of this topic.

I completely understand the horrors of being falsely accused.
I got very confused, and I thought you were complimenting me, and I thought that you changed your mind about me and deleted the post.

And, then I didn't realize until it was too late that it was dryope that was complimenting me, and not you.

I am so sorry for that. And, I'm very sorry I did not apologize correctly/sooner.
I said "my bad" thinking it was the exact same thing as saying "I'm sorry."
Later, I looked up "my bad" on urban dictionary, and I found that it's a rude way of apologizing.
I am terrible at understanding the meanings of some words sometimes.
I am very sorry about this.

In my case, most people misunderstand me, and I misunderstand them. I'm sorry.

If you never want to speak to me, that is fine, I completely understand that.
This was an unfortunate event for both of us. I am very embarrassed.
I am very sorry.

Probably legit although I do respond to medication so I think at least part of is biological for me. I know what it feels like to experience bodily depression and it's not pleasant. And there's nothing anyone can do to help it.

Why do mushrooms make people? Because it affects the brain.

Part of it is situational though. Being an outcast doesn't help depression.

I have no idea what caused you to change so abruptly, this sudden change of attitude. As previously stated, my reasons of wanting to avoid you, they were to prevent some sort of conflict. However, in present terms, you do not seem to me that you are planning to do so....At least basing it with this "sudden change". I hope I am not wrong about it. So, assuming this to be true, if it were the case, I accept your apology. Your exposed reasons might be the case for yourself.

So, with all this, allow me to also apology myself for thinking that your actions were purely ill intended, and that you also followed the same pattern as another individual who reacted in a really bizarre way for just writing "I hope you get better".

I am going to accept now this incident as a true misunderstanding, unless it could be proven the opposite.

No. It is a co morbidity. We are simply neurologically more vulnerable. There is nothing we can do to change that,
other than be prepared.
I am 70 and have had several episodes of depression over the decades. What helps is an outlet, like art or exercise,
and the right physician. Use meds if necessary. Pets are vital, too.

I completely understand avoiding a person to prevent conflict, and I agree with you, and I appreciate that.
It was never an intention for me to attack or offend anyone here.

I am trying to understand people, and share information with them, and I try to be supportive if possible.
I'm here to try to be cooperative with people, I'm not trying to be competitive.

I completely understand being skeptical about people, especially on the Internet.
I am very sorry. Please do not be upset. I never wanted to make anyone here upset.

Also, I'm not really sure what this "Neutral" Emoticon Face means.
Is there any chance that this emoticon says something I was not trying to say?

I assumed that the "Neutral" emoticon meant that I felt unbiased and nonjudgmental if I used it in this context.
That is why I used the "Neutral" emoticon, to show that I'm not trying to be negative and that I was just trying to understand the situation from the illusory perspective that I had.
I didn't realize it was an illusion I had experienced until it was too late.

I am very sorry that I used my language in the wrong way.
I have pragmatic language impairment (as they now call it, instead of Semantic Pragmatic Disorder).

Difficulty in distinguishing offensive remarks is a symptom I tend to have a lot of trouble with.
I tend to perceive that people are being malicious when they are not trying to be.
And, people tend to perceive that I am being malicious when I am not trying to be.

And, it's not just a problem between those with ASD and the NTs without ASD.
Both me and my mother have ASD, and we tend to offend each other unintentionally.

A month ago, my mother and I had a horrible misunderstanding about each other, which was resolved the next day.
My mom and I have been getting along pretty well since then, which I think is mostly sheer luck.

Also, I've been trying very hard to be concise for people, but I fear it might come off as vague unintentionally.
People always hate when I talk too much, the word I tend to use for it is "Verbosity" or "Logorrhea".

That is why my screen name here is "TheCoolStoryBro."
It is a popular "Internet meme" that means a person is verbose, and no one is interested in what they are rambling.
The person listening to the verbose rambling says in a sarcastic way, "Cool story bro! You should tell me it again!"

I do not want to be verbose, I try really hard to be concise for people so it does not upset them when I ramble.
But, when I try to be concise, I think I may be coming off as vague, and it misleads people unintentionally.

I am not good at communication whatsoever. Please do not be upset.
I am terribly sorry for offending you, I never intended to offend you.