I like dishing out a few puns, or well placed movie references. Favorite one:
Sorry, I cannot help you with that.
What? Why?
Because you'd be expecting that . . .

(Watch "Airplane!" if you dont get it).
I rarely play an Undead on WoW . . . they dont have the guts to do anything.
I was walking by a couple of ladies, and for some reason they were talking about their boobs . . . I could only stare. One noticed and they both gave me a dirty look. I say, "Well . . . never say that all men don't stay abreast of womens' interests."
I am a pundit, and proud of it.

I love Airplane--The Johnny character is great--"how about some coffee Johnny?" "No Thanks"--"Johnny what do you make of this?" "Oh I can make a hat,a brooch a pteradactyl"
"Lets take some pictures guys" and they take pictures off the wall--cracks me up every time.