You Might be an Aspie if...

Page 85 of 291 [ 4650 posts ] Go to page Previous 1 ... 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88 ... 291 Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Jainaday
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Jul 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,099
Location: in the They

06 May 2008, 2:04 am

Followthereaper90 wrote:

Jainaday wrote:

When your friends think of you as a cool tickle toy because of how high jump and loud you squeak when unexpectedly touched. .

ROLF

Less funny at the time when you are living it.

Edit: but admissably, still very funny the rest of the time.

_________________
And if I die before I learn to speak
will money pay for all the days I lived awake but half asleep

mariposa
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 29 Apr 2008
Age: 56
Gender: Female
Posts: 35

06 May 2008, 2:33 am

When you're invited for a "bite to eat" and you have one bite and leave!

When you're invited for a "get together" and you ask "What are we getting together?"

-both true stories and both me! I am just now starting to be able to laugh at myself and
these horribly humiliating experiences, when I was corrected by NT's who explained my
misunderstanding to me.

BaalChatzaf
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Mar 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,050
Location: Monroe Twp. NJ

06 May 2008, 8:04 am

[quote="Aspie_rebel"]Comedy thread in the style of "you know you're a redneck when" jokes, just with an autistic twist.[/quote

My literal-mindedness. My grandson asked me how I rode my bike from my house to his. I answered "Well I went down Applgarth Rod to Prospect Plains then onto Dey Road ....". I finally realized that was not what he was trying to find out. He wanted to know how I signaled my turns to the cars that passed me, since I do not have a signal jigger on my bike.

Stuff like this happens all the time. Thank God my wife is used to it (she is an NT, by the way). She claims she can't take me anywhere.

Baal Chatzaf

_________________
Socrates' Last Words: I drank what!! !?????

CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,172
Location: In my own little country

06 May 2008, 9:30 am

If you don't feel any emotion when a family member dies, but you you cry when you see a smashed up car, or if your favorite vehicle is taken off the road.

_________________
The Family Schlager

Liopleurodon
Pileated woodpecker

Joined: 16 Jan 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 196
Location: The Tethys Sea

06 May 2008, 9:31 am

When someone says "wait a second" and you wait exactly one second.

_________________
Do I look like a freaking people person?

Specter
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 18 Apr 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,206
Location: Alaska

06 May 2008, 12:04 pm

Liopleurodon wrote:

When someone says "wait a second" and you wait exactly one second.

or worse "please leave; I need a minute" :S

_________________
"there is no spoon"

Aspie_rebel
Hummingbird

Joined: 13 May 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 24

07 May 2008, 7:13 am

When your teacher catches you talking in class and asks you if you would like to take the class, you take it literally and take the class, by the end of wich your teacher is taking notes.

cdc2001c
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 8 Apr 2008
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 68
Location: Lost in deep thought about cookies.

07 May 2008, 2:27 pm

sim wrote:

You want to learn Japanese the second you hear a great song but don't know what the hell they're saying. Seriously. This is making me mad. I'm waiting ever so impatiently for the library to open so I can get a Japanese language book.

I do this very same thing, I heard a song at the local Chinese restaurant and I went home and found it and had to translate it before I could stop.

You might be an aspie if you explain how you got the correct answer on a math problem to your teacher and she has know idea your method for getting the answer because it is so different than her own.

BAP22
Blue Jay

Joined: 4 May 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 87
Location: Nebraska

07 May 2008, 2:57 pm

...You're waiting in the drive-thru, realize you want to eat at the place across the street, drive over, and while you're waiting in the line you realize you don't want to eat and just go home

pschristmas
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 1 Apr 2008
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 959
Location: Buda, TX

07 May 2008, 3:28 pm

cdc2001c wrote:

You might be an aspie if you explain how you got the correct answer on a math problem to your teacher and she has know idea your method for getting the answer because it is so different than her own.

My grandfather is reputed to have invented his own form of mathematics. He couldn't seem to teach it to any of his children or grandchildren - they just couldn't understand it, although he got the correct answers - and he never wrote it down. He could also pull long quotes from Shakespeare out of his memory. Mom always used this as an example of how the education system was better when he was a boy, but it's really unusual for the son of a farmer who grew up to be a roughneck in the 1920s. I kind of wonder about him.

Patricia

Hodor
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Mar 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 907
Location: England

18 Jul 2008, 4:58 pm

release_the_bats wrote:

You might be an aspie if

. . . the dictionary is your favorite book.

. . . you think textbooks are entertaining light reading material.

. . . you look at news headlines about celebrities and think, "I don't know those people so why would I care?"

. . . you remember people's full names, birthdays, and phone numbers after being told only once but you don't know what color their eyes are.

. . . you don't get why people say things like "hello" and "goodbye", and you often forget to say these things or just secretly wish you didn't have to.

. . . you would rather read a non-fictional account of a party than actually go to a real one.

. . . you have researched social psychology and non-verbal communication in order to blend in and therefore get less attention in social situations.

. . . people often exclaim to you, "Hey, relax! I don't bite!" - when you are relaxed and content.

. . . when someone noticed what book you are reading, they often ask, "That's for school, right?"

Ohmagadz, all of these apply to me.

_________________
"Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig."

Triangular_Trees
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jul 2007
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,799

18 Jul 2008, 5:02 pm

You lament your loss of access to ingentaconnect, sciencedirect and the like even though you have no real need to access such databases

Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,951
Location:

18 Jul 2008, 5:09 pm

You could be an Aspie if...

... you know and understand all the rules of English spelling and grammar, criticize others for the least written infraction thereof, and still can't carry on a meaningful verbal conversation.

... one of the issues you point out is that the word "Aspie" should be capitalized.

... you take the time to make the effort to compile all of these posts into one "You Could Be An Aspie" master text file.

... you can figure out the entire plot of a new movie, including who lives and who dies, within ten minutes of when the opening credits stop rolling.

... you've ever heard anyone tell you, "For a really smart person, you sure are stupid."

... you've ever called the producers of a trivia quiz program to correct one of their mistakes.

... the producers of the same trivia quiz program have ever called you back to check their answers.

... you didn't cry at a relative's funeral, but you couldn't stop crying when your hard drive crashed.

... the first program you ever wrote - in BASIC on a TRS-80 from Radio Shack - was a prime-number search engine that used the Sieve of Eratosthenes.

... you've kept a Windows Millenium system running since the very day that "WinMe" was first sold.

... you've memorized every chart and table in every tabletop role-playing game ever created, but you can't remember the combo to your locker.

... you're annoyed whenever a newscast devotes more time to sports than weather.

... you don't realize that someone has been flirting with you until someone else asks you how long the two of you have been dating.

... your Sunday school teachers cringed every time you raised your hand.

... being right is more important than actually winning an argument.

... the only reason people invite you to their parties is to install or repair their home entertainment / video game systems.

... you are constantly losing friends, or missing out on friendships entirely, due to your unflagging honesty.

... not only do you know that a pineapple is not related in any way to a pine tree or an apple, but you also know why.

... you use the term "and/or" in spoken conversations as much as you do when writing.

... you go back to edit or update your original post as many times as the forum system will let you (10 times for this post alone).

_________________
The mere fact that science may not yet adequately explain an object, event, or experience does not mean the immediate explanation should automatically default to a conspiratorial, extraterrestrial, paranormal, or supernatural cause.

Last edited by Fnord on 18 Jul 2008, 8:06 pm, edited 10 times in total.

lau
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jun 2006
Age: 77
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,798
Location: Somerset UK

18 Jul 2008, 6:57 pm

YMBAAI ... one of the issues you point out is that the word "aspie" should not be capitalized, as it is a newly coined word, unlike the proper name "Asperger's", derived from Hans' surname.

_________________
"Striking up conversations with strangers is an autistic person's version of extreme sports." Kamran Nazeer

Featherways
Snowy Owl