Cliche advice that sets us back

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Once when I was younger and wanted to move out of my mother's house and away from my city I actually had someone tell me I should "just go". How? Hitchhike somewhere and be homeless? They knew I didn't have money or a job.

Now I'm fine with living with my mother and will never move out.

I love this one. I was miserable at a job I hated and had spent three years looking for work with no success. I used to complain about how I hated that job and what did I hear "if you don't like your job, quit and go out west (Alberta)!" Thanks, I never thought of that at all. It couldn't possibly be because I can't find a $@#$#@ job and barely have enough money as it is so moving is out of the question!

Of course, this advice always came from people with stable, high paying jobs.

Absolutely. It reminds me when I finished college and was in so much debt and with no parental support, and unable to find a normal job, someone said they had great advice for me, to go do a Master's degree at one of the best universities in the UK. Sure. Why didn't it occur to me. "Just go".

I have never gotten these advices but they still set me back:

"Move"
"Move out."

Uh how do you expect someone to move to another location? You need money to do it, how can you get a job in another state if you don't live there and they prefer to hire people who live there?

How do you expect someone to move out of their parents home? They need money to move out, they need to be able to afford to live on their own.

People act like it's all so simple. I used to think like this too until I learned more about reality. It surprises me older people don't even know this.

''It's all in your head''
No, I know negative body language when I see it, and I can always prove it too.

''You got to stand up for yourself more''
No can do - when I do that, it always backfires, and I can't help becoming affected by it.

''Those people aren't worth it''
Well, sort of, but it's difficult to say that when you're working with them and got to face them every day. I don't do hostility.

''It's up to you to chat more and make an effort to be more confident''
That sounds so easy to just say to someone, and I can always work on social skills and confidence, but I will never actually be an extrovert, and even if I did just take a deep breath and tried hard to be more chatty and confident, I wouldn't do it right and other people would sense that it's false, because social confidence is not in me. If confidence was something I could just switch on and off like a light, I would not be shy at all, would I?

Disclaimer: May contain heavy sarcasm.

''You had no friends because you were too smart for them. Don't be unhappy.''

I love this optimism. I was too smart of course, watching a washing machine for hours was definitely an excellent choice for a smart child. Those ''stupid'' children became very successful in business life, yet ''smart'' Somberlain fails somehow. Very surprising! I am still too smart, so only Newton, Tesla and Einstein can be friends with me. All we need is some necromancy. OK, I can be happy now.

Argh!

Indeed, you're not smart.
Because if you were, you'd realize that watching a washing machine for hours is not worse nor dumber then doing anything else. You'd also know that success in business life doesn't bring happiness and you'd realize that you can indeed be happy now-just like you could be happy yesterday and just like you can be happy tomorrow.
Too bad for you, it seems you're not smart after all and you can't even comprehends such obvious things.
Also, I'm not sure how being smart has anything to do with having jewish friends.

Newton was Jewish?

Hmm. I hate it when people whine to me about their problems (totally ignoring that I might have any) and then, on asking me for my advice, tell me my response is "rude", or "stupid," or whatever. Even more annoying when they have been whining about the same banal problems for months, sometimes years, and do nothing about them. If you don't want my advice stop chewing my ear off!

1- The thing about washing machine was just a joke. If I was thinking in that way, I would have stop watching it.
2- I did not write anything to correlate happiness and success in business. If you read carefully, it is about the correlation between intelligence and success in business. In my intelligence statement, I include both IQ and EQ. Scientifically, a person with low IQ and EQ has a very low chance of success in business life.
3- You cannot decide if success in business life makes me truly happy or not.
3- Tesla was not Jewish.
4- Newton was not Jewish.
5- I find your wording offensive. Thus, I will not reply your future posts. I am posting this to make things clear.
6- Have a nice day.

Somberlain, I could be mistaken, but I think nrau was trying to cheer you up, show you the good side, and talking a bit tongue in cheek. I know both of you are very fine posters on WP, so I didn't read his post at all like you.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

This is not aligned with the most recent thread on this post, rather the overall topic, but had to get it out:

"Well if you don't want them to know that you have this (Aspergers) condition, then just don't tell them about it!!"

Ummm...like they're not gonna discover that "something's up" anyway/eventually??!

DUH...

okay, you too

also, I don't know about whether Newton was a jew, but his first name was Isaac.

"It can't be that everyone rejects you; it's that you unconsciously push people away. You have to work on your fear of intimacy".

You only push people away because you fear they will end up rejecting you, so you beat them to the punch.
Try being nicer next time instead of so hostile