Do euphemisms get on your nerves?

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I wholeheartedly agree that unpleasant truth should never be masked with neutral phraseology just to ease someone's guilty conscience. It's sheer hypocrisy and in my book there's no essential ethical difference between hypocrisy and outright deception.

The first three original thread phrases however, I use all the time (meaning frequently) and I generally intend them to mean exactly what they say, insofar as a generally vague phrase may be interpreted with more or less exactness.

And I must admit I am often guilty of using the phrase "I don't know" to mean "I'm not going to discuss that with you at this time, because it would only extend a conversational topic with which I am already less than comfortable"...or more directly: "Go away".

"released"? OMG, that's terrible.

Now I can read NTs quite well in some aspects, after almost half a century of taking them literally and making a fool of myself:

"I need space"
"Let's move to a bigger house, then"

"Don't let me keep you"
"Oh no, I'm actually enjoying your presence"

"We're letting you go"
"No need, I want to stay."

But if you look up "release someone" in the Webster's, one of the meanings is "to fire someone". Quite the euphemism...

Some euphemisms are more insulting than others, I agree. "Pass away" I strongly advocate in favor.

Others make me laugh: "Pass wind" instead of "fart"

But most make me furious for the hypocrisy in them, like all those "ready" expressions. "I don't feel ready for this" (instead of "don't wanna").

"healthy" instead of "overweight"

I agree. I would never say "died" to someone in the grieving process. Perhaps "kicked the bucket"... erm... no j/k .

Actually "no longer with us" would be something I'd prefer to use because "passed away" will always sound odd to me on a gut level as it comes out of my mouth. I can't really explain why. There are also some other phrases where I feel this strange aversion. I don't mind hearing other people use them, I just feel uncomfortable using them myself.

"No longer with us" is a really nice one. It implies that the person is simply elswhere. Somewhere inaccesable to us but still in existence somehow.

Does "Don't let me keep you" mean "Lemmie go!" then? What should someone say if they want to make sure that they're not overstaying their welcome?
And even if they are wanting to go just then, that doesn't mean they dislike talking to you.. they could just not consider before breakfast the greatest time to talk/think. I can kinda do that with my neighbor sometimes... I adore her, she's awesome, I love how she talks on and on because then I don't feel quite so stupid that I don't have anything to say... but she's usually outside early, and I just kinda roll out of bed to take the dog outside.. so I'm not fully conscious. Also haven't brushed my hair and may or may not have even peed...
I should really go over there at better times to chat with her, I guess.. But I'm afraid I'll be annoying. I prefer to let other people decide when they want to talk to me because then I don't feel like I've backed them into it. It probably ends up making them feel like I don't want to talk to them.. *sigh*

Sorry I went into all that... I just keep seeing all these things that you get bothered that NTs do, because it means that the NT doesn't like you, and I know I do those things to people, but they don't at all mean I don't like the person. No wonder people hate me. But totally and honestly, when I do those things you talk about, it doesn't mean that!

I'm sorry. Poor baby. Please don't take that as sarcastic. You made me feel your frustration.

It's funny. When I was a child I was taught to use euphemisms because it was rude to say it bluntly.

My wife is forever coming up with all of these between the lines meanings for what people mean by what they said, that I don't get from their words, and it's annoying to me. She feels like she needs to protect me from myself since I don't see it that way.

Last edited by willmark on 01 Jul 2009, 6:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

No, I like euphemisms. But that's because I have a very dry sense of humour.

Well, I use them or things like them for that reason too.

Greentea wrote:

I don’t think you made a fool of yourself. I think you made a fool of them. In any case, those are the same things I say and enjoy when people squirm in front of me.

The only euphemisms I hate are the ones that are mean't to "be nice", when in reality it's mean't to ease their guilt and put up the illusion that they're "nice" when they are infact insulting due to the cowardice and dishonesty shown by the user of said euphemism.

True kindness comes from the heart, not the mouth.

"I need space" is a homonystic euphemism, meaning the phrase can mean a variety of things other than that. It can also mean "I feel suffocated, I need alone time or time with my friends".



I don't see the difference between the statement and the meaning.



Again a homonystic euphemism, it can also literally mean "I don't know".



I agree completely, deception to ease their conscience and put up the illusion of "niceness", is repugnant.



We're all guilty of something, admitting to it in a good moral manner is a sign of introspection and self-growth.



I'm sure "releasing someone" is just saying "laid off" which doesn't mean "fired" unless you take the word "fired" to mean kicked off the job for anyreason.

"Fired" generally means you got kicked off the job for bad behaviour or poor work ethic.

"Laid off" generally means you got kicked off the job because "buisness is slow" or they found a vastly "superior" replacement. Basically being "laid off" is getting kicked off for different reasoning than being "fired".



They also could be having doubts or second thoughts, things aren't "black and white", people are very complex.



That's called "denial" or just "lying". I can't think of anything to add to that.



Euphemism's like that are acceptable and good, having tact sometimes is a good thing but having nothing but tact isn't a good thing, you can't always be nice, especially against the heinous.



It's another homonystic euphemism, it can mean that, but it can also mean "I don't want to waste your time if you find me boring", it can have various meanings depending upon the individual using it, it's a circumstantial.



Yep, it's called a "break-down in communication", one person takes something the wrong way, it's not a AS vs NT thing.

Last edited by Demon-Chorus on 01 Jul 2009, 7:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Spaced out topic

Sometimes I do need space. I can visualize this, so if someone tells me it is needed, I understand.

I just do not like vagarities. I ask people to be specific, so I can visualize better, and get them to commit. Example: Instead of saying "later", specify the timeframe.

Oh no. I enjoy the word plays and the antics of language.
I visualise it all literally and then have fun working it out. It has always existed in this manner for me. euphemisms, puns, metaphors, word plays. I love the creativity of language and writing - its infinite capacity to change and morph and bring richness to my life.
I love literature. I love poetry. I see the creativity of language as part of a continuum that flows from the spoken through to the written and back again. For me it is plastic and mutable, and yet, I still have a tendency to take things literally. Sunshower mentioned a similar tendency some weeks ago and i related to her in this respect.

collateral damage

I always found use of the phrase "make water" to mean "urinate" to be deeply disturbing. Now, on the Space Station, it's no longer a euphemism, which is even more disturbing. I knew when I read DUNE it was just a matter of time...