Am I an aspie?

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Thank you all for the replies, I really appreciate your time.

I don't think I'll ever seek for a professional diagnosis, because like someone said before, my life is quite allright, and no matter what the diagnosis would be, it wouldn't change a thing. My life is not perfect - I often ask myself why am I such a poor friend (some weeks ago I sent a message to my university friend about how she is, she sent me a reply that she's fine and when will we talk. Then she called me at least 5 times in the next days, and I was UNABLE to pick up the phone. I told my wife because I don't want to get too deep into this friendship. I wouldn't say this is normal behaviour.), or why couldn't I see that I hurt someone (I remember the times when I explained my rudeness to others as talking straight to others is always less painful than hiding things) -, but apart from these I'm happy with what I got. I just wish sometimes I could have friends or just go out to the beach after work with my colleagues who always invite me. I can't. I do a lot of efforts to make friends, but when I get close enough to someone, I start to get crazy.

So, of course a professional diagnosis wouldn't change a thing, but if I had AS, that would explain a lot to me. It still is possible, that I'm just a weirdo who's imagining he has AS, just to explain his weird behaviour. On the other hand, knowing the skills of the doctors in my home country, I wouldn't be surprised if they diagnosed me with flu instead of AS. I don't handle AS as a disease, and as long as I'm not depressed, it really isn't a bad thing that would need any medication.

I've taken the test suggested by Dilbert, scored 35. (34 & up means "autism likely") I tried to answer as honestly as possible, but of course it is possible that I made some mistakes.

Sorry if the above is a bit messy, I had to get up at 3:30am this morning because of my job, so I'm a bit sleepy. I have so many thoughts I'd like to share, but I have to get back to my work now.

glad to see my words helped some, m at the moment AS would explain a lot for my social behaviour but about a week ago I thought about how quickly people ruh into situations and think a diagnosis can save them but in all honesty it does nothing if you know or sspect you have it you have it and if you got the tenasity in life you're just let it go and get on with it even though in your head you have an explaination

Believe me though you sound really independent and successful I think the more you get out of life for example kids , a new house etc etc the more you will want out of life in a spiritual intellectual way I have seen and heard cases of people getting even more independent in like their 40s just remember that if you truly want to know someone just put in an email I will call you or something along the lines I am frequently busy etc etc

You're eglish is very good by the way
Do take care

I have some other weird thing about me, I just remembered now. I wonder if it happens to AS folks too. Despite getting nervous when I have to talk to new people, getting into new situations and so on, in other cases I feel no fear when I really should. Sometimes it is even irrational for me, that when everyone else would run away frightened, I feel nothing. My wife noticed this long ago, and asks me here and then if I never feel fear. I always say, why would I be afraid? But if I think it over logically, I realize it is abnormal.

Oh well, just a thought.

in my opinion you most definitely have AS.
i can relate to many of those symptoms and even the...errr....more embarrassing ones. you are not alone my friend.

out of curiosity, which is your native country?

Just so you know, you will probably go back and forth on this pretty hard on this issue for the next period of time (weeks, months, maybe years). It's easy to go into this saying, "Well, I know I have it, and that's that!" but that's when all of the doubt starts creeping in. If you tell people you know, there's a good chance they will tell you, "What, you? No, you don't have that. Someone with Asperger's blah blah blah, and that's not you at all," where blah blah blah is any AS stereotype: doesn't make eye contact, has no empathy, etc. It will be awhile before the dust settles. Then again, the same might be true even if you acquired a professional diagnosis.


Hmm... that could stem from your inability to read situations and people. Do you think it's a lack of fear due to naivete of a situation, or is it always just a lack of fear? Or you could just be a high-sensation seeker, possibly with some hyposensitivity issues or a higher than normal pain threshold? Or it could be something unrelated.

Sean, thanks for your words.

It's Hungary.

Fiddlerpianist:

When talking about no fear, do not think of too big things, but rather small ones (yet they may still be significant).

For example, once I was mountainbiking, and found a very angry looking barking dog in the forest. Normally any rider would turn around, and try to get away from the dog. Not me, I did not feel that it could hurt me, so I just passed by. Afterward I realized that perhaps it was probably not the best idea. I don't know how to explain, but I just couldn't see any danger in the situation.

I think this little story best describes how I can not realize that I'm in danger.

Or when I go out for some observation in the evening, usually other guys tell stories in forums that they were frightened by this and that, or if they are afraid to go alone with such an expensive equipment that is also hard to run with. And I never feel like that. If I hear some strange noise, it doesn't frighten me at all. But I do KNOW that I should be afraid, because that is normal.

Perhaps this has nothing to do with AS at all, just a thought really.

I scored 36. We are both right on the borderline. This is probably why you (and I as well) didn't know until just recently.

Autistic spectrum disorders vary wildly. From a socially awkward geek, all the way down to a Rain Man type of a person.

By the way, what telescope do you have? I have a 5" Meade ETX-125 with a motorized mount and Autostar. I would love to get a 8 or 10 inch LX-90 GPS. But I live in an apartment so I really have no room for one.

I have a GSO 12" Newtonian on a custom built horseshoe mount. The mount itself weighs about 160lbs.

Sorry to bother you all again, but perhaps this is also interesting: I've found an Asperger test in one of the other topics, which seems to be referred as a good one.

The scores are:

Your Aspie score: 141 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 74 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie.

Trait group Score Judgement
Aspie talent 9.0 Above average
Neurotypical talent 3.2 Below average
Aspie compulsion 8.7 Above average
Neurotypical compulsion 1.3 Below average
Aspie activity pattern 9.2 Above average
Neurotypical social 1.8 Below average
Aspie communication 3.4 Average
Neurotypical communication 4.7 Average
Aspie hunting 3.6 Average
Neurotypical hunting 5.8 Average
Aspie perception 9.4 Above average
Neurotypical perception 7.3 Above average

Meanwhile I told my wife about my "big" discovery. She was first a bit shocked (her first question was how long does an aspie live). Then she read some of the symptoms I've found in some sites, and she came to me laughing, that these are just sooo true for me.