Do we tell the truth more?

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I was with a woman friend once and she commented that she was putting on weight. I said that it didn't matter. And it was true. I like a person. They can gain or loose weight, but that doesn't change who they are.

If I ever get asked, "Do these jeans make me look fat?" I know the perfect reply. "You always look beautiful to me."

If this question is comparing ASDians to NT's then I think if we ASDian's do lie, it's far, far,far less than NT's. I am a great observer of human interaction and the vast majority of NT folk lie like there is no tomorrow for no great gain at all.Thats one thing I really hate about them. It's an obsession to them and they think nothing of it. We have to be the more evolved of the species in atleast this respect. I have told lies in the past for seriously important reasons but I hate doing it. As a few people have said we are not good at it. I am so obvious in my dealings with people if I do tell a lie I usually end up confessing(not voluntarily), (without words)in a multitude of other ways, so why bother.

I will not usually lie for others either, Unless there is a very good reason and there are no victims because of my lie. When I was at Uni I ended a friendship with someone I had been friends with since kindergarten because she was engaged to one guy (whom I could not stand) and was sleeping with atleast 1 other behind his back. The sleeping around was not a great deal breaker on it's own as apparently he had been doing it too. The issue for me was more the fact that she tryed to involve me in her lies. I tryed to be a good friend and hear no evil, see no evil and speek no evil but I just could not do it. I felt sick everytime I saw her fiance. I could not look him in the eyes and had trouble even saying hello. I told my friend in no uncertain terms that I would not be involved with the deciept any longer, and that it was wrong for her to expect me to in the first place. She was certainly not impressed at all and made me feel like there was something seriously amis with me, because I would not play her game. So I left the club we were at at the time (she was expecting her second boyfriend any minute)and I never returned any of her calls. They soon stopped.

As far as telling lies to avoid hurting peoples feelings, especially about superficial stuff. I say nothing unles I am specifically asked, and most people who ask these sorts of things usually avoid me like the plague because I am told I have that "NO BS look" about me. I am not concerned because when most people ask things like this they are not actually asking the question but they are trying for some kind of affirmation.(whole other topic here) Best to say they won't be getting it from me!

If I am asked then I say "do you want the truth? Because I will give it to you". If they say "yes" then I tell them as gently as I know how, but I still tell them exactly what I think. If they say No or I don't know. I say "then you were not serious about the question any way". I refuse to play BS double talk games with people, I cannot see the point in it. It certainly wastes my time and energy and there are so many other things happening in the world I would rather be talking or worrying about.

Cheers

PS Robert312,

Good foward thinking but with all due respect, do you seriously think if a woman (especially an NT woman) asks you if you think her jeans make her look fat that "you always look beautiful to me" will cut it? If it does work for you even one time I would be very suprised.LOL LOL LOL

It depends on the situtation, sometimes I do tell the trust and sometimes I just flat out lie!

Many years ago, I knew a clergyman who could tell a lie with the truth. Whenever he saw a newborn for the first time, he would say, "Now *that's* a baby!"

Every mother just beamed.