Anxiety

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Near perpetual anxiety, only broken occasionally by periods of calm alone time.

Often times, there are no overt triggers. I experience truly irrational anxiety, which does not result from external stressors or internal thoughts. I will simply begin to feel the physical and emotional symptoms of anxiety for no apparent reason: sweating, shortness of breath, increased heart rate, paranoia, fear, sense of dread, etc.

I need to be getting medication/therapy. It does interfere with my daily functioning quite a bit.

I am actually feeling 'calmer' since I discovered I has Asperger's.

Maybe something to do with being aware of what is happening to me and WHY it is happening helps me to take a step back and look and feel (?) what is happening to me.

I'm getting better at this but it will take a lot of practice.

Last edited by Blindspot149 on 30 Oct 2009, 11:10 am, edited 1 time in total.

Same here.

I'm ALWAYS worrying about school,I don't have a diagnosis of GAD because that's the only thing I worry about all the time. I'm afraid though of fires, rejection (a specific version of this is public speaking, I'm afraid of being judged), lockdowns,and being outside alone when things remind me of it.

It's debilitating enough to warrant going on disability. I'm honestly not sure if I could handle a job. I would probably have a mental breakdown, which is a stressful thought in and of itself.

I experience all kinds of anxiety; generalized, social, panic, excessive worrying, the works.

I've had therapists tell me that I display an uncommonly high level of anxiety. Lately, I have been thinking about the correlation between anxiety and AS. I definitely have anxiety, and I'm 99.9% sure I have AS as well. I think that sensory/ information overload definitely increases my anxiety.
Perseveration can have a similar effect. While I generally enjoy perseverating on things I'm interested in, such as education, and children's literature, I find myself perseverating on less pleasant things as well. I don't want to get into the various things I tend to worry about here, because if I do, this reply will go on forever. Suffice it to say, if I'm worried about a particular thing going wrong, I'll worry obsessively about it, and the worry will grow more pervasive and intense the more I think about it. It's worse when a worry involves something I've actually experienced in the past, because then I'll perseverate on my past experiences, and the terrifying possibility of said past experiences repeating themselves. These worries can turn into what some would consider paranoia, though I personally prefer the term "pathological hypervigilance." The few people I'm comfortable discussing these things have told me that I really need to stop worrying so much, to just "let it go," and live my life. Easier said than done when "letting things go" is *really* not my strong point. My Mom has said that it's really frustrating when I keep on going on and on about the same thing. It can be quite frustrating for me, too, especially when I can't stop obsessing about some worry/ worst case scenario situation. Unfortunately, I really don't know how to turn that off. That definitely increases my anxiety significantly.
Wow, this got long, in spite of my best efforts. Anyway, the answer is yes, anxiety is a significant issue in my life. Okay, I'm done saying my piece.

I dont think i have anxiety although i have irritablity. i dont think ive ever worried about a thing in my life. im probablly the most carefree person i know.

I'm not sure whether I've ever experienced anxiety. Could someone please explain this? The definition on Wikipedia seems totally illogical:

Why one would have an emotion that arises when one is prepared to cope with something in the future is beyond me. Why have an emotion that results from the knowledge that one will have an emotion?

Yeah.. it's when you started feeling like you were responsible for stuff, right? XD;;

I think that's why I avoid responsibility if I can, and just let everyone else make the choices...

I procrastinate really bad, and part of it is just because I'm lazy, I guess, but the other part is because I'm too anxious. Like, I write a lot of emails, and save them.. and am lucky if I ever get around to sending them. D: Because I want to get them PERFECT, and I want to make exactly the right impression on people. And my heart starts beating really fast if I have to send one. And if I GET an email, or like, a private message on a community website... my heart starts HAMMERING until the page loads. XD; Like "SOMEONE WANTS TO TALK TO ME IN PRIVATE? OH SH**, WHAT DID I DO??"

And half the reason I don't have a job yet is, I'm pretty sure, because I don't feel at all confident about my abilities, even though I know in my head (as opposed to my heart..) that I do have some good skills. So I never apply for jobs, because I don't feel like I'd be able to do them well enough.

So, since I stay away from responsibility, my life isn't a panic attack.. but I can see how it could be. D: D: D:

EDIT: waah, I'm starting to sweat just from participating in this thread and thinking about these things.;;; I had to take off my jacket.
Jeez, wow, I never thought about it but I guess I totally have anxiety issues.

Last edited by wigglyspider on 03 Nov 2009, 5:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

Being prepared to cope with upcoming events? That sounds like the opposite of anxiety.. XD;;;
It's not about what mood you'll have in the future... I don't think that's what the Wikipedia wording means. It's about anticipating the possible disastrous situations that could arise in the future. Especially, I think, the disastrous situations that might arise from your own actions. (Which might hinder your ability to preform those actions.) It's worrying that you won't be able to deal with the things that come your way.

Right... That seems to be in line with my interpretation of the Wikipedia wording.
In any case, I don't think that I've had such an emotion. Am I missing anything? If it's rubbish, then I don't want it.

What I have had are what I've designated as worry and concern. However, these are distinctly different in that they don't revolve around my actions, but rather those of others.
Worry, as I call it, revolves around how someone else's actions may affect me, while concern revolves around how someone else's actions may affect them (and me indirectly).

As for my own abilities, I know what I can do and am confident that I can execute a planned action.

Oh, if only I could know what it's like to not be in a constant state of anxiety. Must be nice.

Yeah, it's different from those. Worry and concern are a lot more distant, I think. Especially concern. Anxiety is aaaallllllllllllllll on you. I guess it's kind of self-inflicted. It's worry plus a sense of responsibility.

It varies. My anxiety can change depending on the situation. Usually it is at its worst during social occasions.

I get it when there's other people around, and when I remember old mistakes and nightmares. I'm getting better at overcoming it, though - anger and focusing helps. Basically I think "f*ck them", shut them out and focus on doing whatever caused me to step outside the house.

I live in a state of constant anxiety. I used to drink a lot to try to make it go away. Now I take Valium, which worked well for about a day and a half. It's the only emotion I really do understand. A lot of the anxiety is social- "What am I going to screw up this time?" or related to scripts that I have being broken. I am afraid of going to the store and seeing someone I know, because it will break the script and I will wander out of the store, forgetting what I went to get in the first place. I am afraid of driving on the interstate because I cannot predict what other drivers will do. I am afraid of opening my mailbox. What if there's a letter from someone in there that I have to answer, or a phone call I have to make? But even all alone at home, doing things I love, it's still there-- lurking.

I have been this way since I was a little kid. In third grade I had a complete and total meltdown because I missed a word on my spelling test. I was terrified that I was stupid and that my parents wouldn't love me anymore because I was stupid. The school finally had to call my mom to take me home.

My mother tells me that I am paralyzed by my anxiety, and in a way she is probably right. What she doesn't understand is why I'm anxious, and a lot of the time I don't have the ability to explain it in words. I am anxious because I do not understand the way the world works. I am afraid to interact with people because I don't know how. I don't know what's happening and that is terrifying. I don't like not knowing what is happening or what is going to happen. And when you find it really difficult to figure out what other people are thinking and feeling, it's hard to know what's going to happen. And that just makes the anxiety worse. Wow. I just got that out in words.

And I can sort of see why stimming, routines and obsessing over other things can help this anxiety. Stimming releases energy in a repetitive, predictable way. Routines are predictable, and when followed lessen anxiety. Obsessing over topics, focusing on certain interests affords a level of control. When the outside world is unpredictable, it follows that you'd do things to try to make it fit a pattern.

Does this sound rational to anyone else? I feel like I'm somehow more self-aware now, but I don't think that's the case. I think rationality just won. Whoa.