trouble with finding the words you are trying to say

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Stress!! !! thats it!! ! Stress is a definate in my life right now. Christmas coming, absolutely no money( very thankful for Christmas assistance for presents for kids thanks to peoples donations. ); the tires on my minivan are bald( no traction) need new ones(couldn't make it to my appt. with my Asperger specialist becaseu it is 115 mile round trip and there is ice and snow on the roads); stuck inside with kids all week( snow days tuesday-thurs= no school, and for 4 year old, no school from tuesday till today due to snow days. ick), SSI not going up this year due to "supposed inflation not going up" that is BS. I am paying alot more for needed items, but the government claims that there has been no inflation throughout last year. I'm dreading January when prices on food, necessities, etc. goes way up and I can no longer afford it all. Even tyyping is difficult in the way of spelling. I also have trouble coming up with words also, but not as bad, as I have a theasarous to look upu words, etc.

Stress!! !! thats it!! ! Stress is a definate in my life right now. Christmas coming, absolutely no money( very thankful for Christmas assistance for presents for kids thanks to peoples donations. ); the tires on my minivan are bald( no traction) need new ones(couldn't make it to my appt. with my Asperger specialist becaseu it is 115 mile round trip and there is ice and snow on the roads); stuck inside with kids all week( snow days tuesday-thurs= no school, and for 4 year old, no school from tuesday till today due to snow days. ick), SSI not going up this year due to "supposed inflation not going up" that is BS. I am paying alot more for needed items, but the government claims that there has been no inflation throughout last year. I'm dreading January when prices on food, necessities, etc. goes way up and I can no longer afford it all. Even tyyping is difficult in the way of spelling. I also have trouble coming up with words also, but not as bad, as I have a theasarous to look upu words, etc.

Yep. I have this issue. Other times I will know a word but not know it's pronunciation since I've read a lot more words than I've ever heard spoken.

Yesss,omg, lotsssss. More of losing words than switching words. But also switching words.
I always end up miming the look or the sound of the thing or saying what color it is before I remember what it's called.

Yeah, I've had this happen a lot. Its either this or me running on and on being oblivious to the fact that the other person needs/wants to leave. Sometimes I manage to get it right though! Its as though brain and mouth just aren't synching up the way they ought to, and sometimes I try to compensate by joking about it, "Hang on, train of thought still boarding at the station", or, "just having a senior moment" that kind of thing. Sigh.

Yes, that's totally me. I can write but cannot speak. My graduate degree is in creative writing and my thesis was my own fiction and poetry. My professors liked my writing but found me less than charming, oh well (This was before I found out about AS and I was determined that in grad school at last I would find people like me. Seemed a shoo-in -- boy was I wrong. I thought I would meet the friends I would have for life instead I ended up alienating everyone I met, pretty much.)

Once, in fact, someone had told me that a short story of mine was 'witty' and then they said "but you're not witty!" Because I was standing there, I didn't have a reply of course. But if I'd been writing a message to him instead, I would've said "Very funny, jerk!"

As someone who has also had a teaching fellowship (it was like terrorizing myself -- I don't like speaking in front of people) and limped through it based on smarts alone and not speaking well at all or enough to explain things or sound prepared, I can say that that old teaching adage of composition instructors "just write the way you talk" is complete fiction. Very few people actually write the way they talk and I wish I had the article to source here, but I've read that where the brain processes speech and where it processes writing are two different areas and so it is impossible in many cases to 'write how you speak'.

I could never figure out how to write the way I talk, either - but I did learn to talk the way I write. I've gotten really good at composing little speeches in my head & can usually do it as fast as I can speak the words. I know it makes me sound pedantic, but at least I'm able to get my point across.

When I was in grade school, I talked exactly the same way I wrote (which was way above grade-level). In junior high, I finally figured out that it was a contributing factor in the huge amount of bullying I had to endure.

If people would just let me talk the way I write, give me adequate time to process what they say to me, and allow me to speak slowly and to formulate my thoughts when asked to "think on my feet," I would have absolutely no problem communicating verbally.

(I guess that's kind of circular reasoning, LOL--"If there wasn't a problem, I wouldn't have any problem!")

That's a good idea. So easy to jump in with what you think is correct word.

Ohhh, this a million times over. I'm so much better at communication online just in general than I am in day-to-day life, and my poor verbal co-ordination (That's what the Ed. Psych. called it) does mean that I muddle up words, get them comin out of my mouth wrong, have to stop midway through sentences, etc. It can be very frustrating.

I'm seeing two different things in this thread.. the concept of not being able to find a word, and, somewhat separately, saying the wrong word. While I think it's common for the not-being-able-to-find-a-word to come after the saying-the-wrong-word (usually because you get nervous after you've said the wrong word) I see them as separate issues. It's more "acceptable" to have trouble finding a word than it is to say the wrong word.. I've had a lot of issues with the saying-the-wrong-word thing. Well, I've had issues with both. But while the not-finding-words things is troublesome, annoying, and embarrassing, it's not as bad as having to clean up the mess after accidentally saying the wrong word..

I am notorious for saying what is going on in my head if I do not focus my full attention on speaking. e.g. My job involves taking inbound calls from mainly doctor's offices to do prior authorizations for injectable medications. When i answer the phone i have a little spiel I say "Thank you for calling Prescription Solutions specialty prior authorizations department. This is James speaking. How may i assist you?" If for example I am typing an email or thinking about something (when am I not daydreaming) I will say what i am typing or thinking even though i have this greeting down pat.

I also have a tendancy to forget words and just freeze searching my brain for that word or a close substitiute. As well as just saying the complete wrong word. (mainly when i am not focused on exactly what I am saying) e.g. i was talking to my neice and her husband both of which were off work because of a bad car accident. I forget the exact thing i was saying but i was trying to say something to the effect of it would be nice for them financially when they were medically cleared to go back to work... i said something to the effect of "when they get a job" as opposed to "when they are cleared to go back to work". Which of course didn't go over very well and made me look like a total moron (isn't the first time and most definitely won't be the last) as I know they have jobs they are just on short term disability.

I have to have my complete focus on what i am saying or you never know what will come out.