just when you think you have things figured out...

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I'm with those who are very literal thinkers. I have one small group of people who usually understand this and don't mind me asking for clarification. I've tried to hang out with other groups of people where sometimes they are sarcastic and joking around and just when I think I have the group dynamics figured out I'll say something in a joking or sarcastic manner and find out they were not joking around. So with most groups I'm totally silent.

Yup. I can read body language and facial expressions, but I still have problems. Most of it comes from mis-reading it all and not knowing how to respond to it.

By that definition, I have no friends.

it sounds like a really rude thing to say to someone. I have noticed that since childhood I have a habit of attracting really blunt people into my life who, when I look back realistically, their behavior could fall into the definition of mistreatment. My problem was that I thought 'well, it's the truth or why would they say it'. Because I felt that I was that way (truthful). It's a real gray area for me. I have noticed a couple other posts on here where people were being mistreated (abused I would say) and both times they were asking for reasons why the people did it. Trying to use logic to understand the behavior. I think this is something that maybe NT people have a better time with, they might innately understand when someone is being a jerk and not try to apply reason to the behavior. You can always ask him what was behind it and tell him it was really hurtful to you to hear that.

Actually I asked him if he hated me and he said no. Later he texted me and said for me not to take it personally, he just doesn't like to rush into roommate situations due to bad experiences. I said "Don't worry about it. I'm just terrible at reading people. I wasn't even really serious about it. I was just caught off guard by how much you were against it." He has seemed fine with me since then and I think he's completely forgotten about it. I've decided to give him a break from me though so I don't annoy him.

I guess that depends on how you define "working." If people think that you're kinda quirky and weird, and they like you, then aren't your efforts working? Unless your goal was to morph into a totally different person and be totally "normal" and "average" and whatnot, I don't see how it's "not working" just because they can tell that you're using intellect to make up for a lack of social skills. Most people worth knowing consider "normal" an insult.

I hadn't quite thought of it that way. Thanks.

heh after hearing about all this it makes me wonder if it's better to find roomates who are complete strangers. Then if it doesn't work out...