This feels a little counterproductive...
happymusic
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Interesting points, though I do think some NTs like parents, significant others, close friends, might be willing to autism to better understand the person they love. I guess it brings up the important point of who the book would target. I suppose I was thinking from the perspective of people with AS age 15 to adult. I also was thinking of people who don't get diagnosed until later in life - it might be helpful to see the many expressions of HFA or AS especially if they have some self doubt or are confused because of misrepresentation of those with autism. But then, I guess this site serves that purpose, too.
I fear that you guys may have fallen into the same trap that NTs themselves have fallen into (thinking that others always share your overall objective). Studying things in order to fully understand it is an Autistic trait, and not considered of any importance by most NTs. NTs only study things in order to know how to control, destroy, or change things. Their motives are preset before inquiry begins, and their conclusions can only take a limited path with such a mindset.
I fear a book about Autism by Autistics may seem like a foolish indulgence of awkwardness, rather than a dictionary from the source. I wish I am wrong.
I'm under no delusions about the likelihood of the proposed book changing the world. It's a slim chance, but better than leaving things as they are, and I think we'd feel better for having written it.
I fear that you guys may have fallen into the same trap that NTs themselves have fallen into (thinking that others always share your overall objective). Studying things in order to fully understand it is an Autistic trait, and not considered of any importance by most NTs. NTs only study things in order to know how to control, destroy, or change things. Their motives are preset before inquiry begins, and their conclusions can only take a limited path with such a mindset.
Is this true? If so it definitely explains a lot.
You know it makes me wonder if maybe a book contrasting or highlighting the differences between the two (NT/Aspie) would be more interesting to me, than just a single perspective with insights. Are motives that drastically different?
If true, since the other side (NT) won't get as much out of a book such as this, maybe changing the angle and making it a "Guide to NT for Aspies" would be a good idea. LOL
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If true, since the other side (NT) won't get as much out of a book such as this, maybe changing the angle and making it a "Guide to NT for Aspies" would be a good idea. LOL
Food for thought there. I still think a book to directly address the inherent bias in AS books by NTs would be an important step, but another book about NTs by Aspies would also have merit, as long as we don't fall into the same bias trap, in reverse. With so many bad experiences at the hands of NTs, it would be all too easy to lapse into the "you stitched us up, now it's our turn
Also, I've sometimes thought that maybe I'd gain a lot from studying NTs as avidly as I study the AS traits. Trouble is, I've yet to find any archetypical subjects in real life. My job is just the kind of place where Aspies would tend to collect, so colleagues cannot be assumed to be "pure" NT. Likewise, in my private life I have such a penchant for oddballs that I doubt if I know even one NT.
I believe that Therese Joliffe was an autistic person doing autism research. Michelle Dawson is too. I collaborate with some researchers and am in an organization that pairs autistics up with researchers to do various projects. Right now we are doing a study on autistic people's experiences of healthcare.
It is definitely not true that nonautistic people only study something for ulterior motives. Lots of NTs study things for the sake of knowledge. And I have worked with some great researchers who are nonautistic and trying to expose the flaws and biases in autism research. Morton Gernsbacher is one example. Go to her website and look up her stuff, it's excellent.
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What I would like to see in a book (and with all the other topics mentioned so far, why should we limit ourselves to one?) is a more basic explanation of symptoms, issues, coping mechanisms etc... from the aspie side of it. While there is material out right now that doesn't do this, I can count how many things I've read that say things like "lack emotion" instead of "lack skills to express emotion" and those that do rarely seem to come with anything helpful to cope with the issue.
Maybe something in this set up:
1. Explain the basic issue
2. Explain why (if known) this occurs
3. How the aspie can cope with it, some pit falls to watch out for, etc...
4. How the NT in the aspies life can cope with it, pit falls, warning signs, etc...
And to figure out what we would like to have addressed we could do a survey (other than here I don't know who else would be interested) and I don't mean just questions from the aspies because there are a lot of NTs on here just scratching their heads about us most the time. I think the purpose it would ultimately serve is something for newly diagnosed teens and adults to read and know their not the only ones, for parents to read when their aspie kids start getting older so they can kind of have a heads up and start helping their kid from the get go (and maybe be a little kick in the pants for those that seem to think that this is something that people grow out of at 18, kind of tired of that opinion cropping up personally), maybe something for counselors and therapists who don't specialize in helping people on the spectrum with patients who are (can you imagine being a therapist for say violent crime victims having no idea how to even talk to the patient) and such. Maybe a section (or a whole other book) on situations with common behaviors from each side as a kind of translation, because I'm not sure its just the aspies trying to figure out what the NTs mean, but the same way around because we kind of have our own set of common body language that reads wrong for them.
No it won't help out with the people you just run into every day, but those situations would be a lot easier to handle knowing your coming home to someone who gets it, understands why some things just set you off and that its not just to be inconvenient (like how some really bad aversions can hit you). One definitely important thing to add would be something that is nearly always missed when treating nearly any problem: Symptoms are not the same for everyone, not everyone will experience them all, and not all treatments and coping mechanisms will help (big reason why I'd like to see multiple suggestions for each issue, probably with anecdotes of how it helped and didn't help).
I don't know, maybe I just need something to hand close friends and family to explain those days when to them it seems like I freak over the littlest thing, but really I've been having what they would deem that rare really really bad day for the a week, and know it will only take a few days off if I'm lucky before the cycle starts again. Something I hear all the time after knocking a dozen things over and finally losing patiences is "Why don't you just watch where your going?" It would be great to have people in my daily life understand that I am, but my coordination is that bad and its not just a head in the clouds thing. Stuff like that. I didn't really think it would be changing the opinions of NTs everywhere or be a battle of us vs. them but really just a tool to clearify for both sides who are interested in learning about it.
I'm sure you're right. Just that NTs, even those with the best intentions and the greatest integrity, will be limited in their perceptions of us, because they can never climb into the Aspie mind and know directly about us. I wouldn't want to replace them, because they're extremely valuable and they can give us insights that we wouldn't notice by ourselves; their preponderance in the literature robs us of our authority. They have a built-in blind spot because they can't do a Vulcan mind probe on us,
It is definitely not true that nonautistic people only study something for ulterior motives. Lots of NTs study things for the sake of knowledge. And I have worked with some great researchers who are nonautistic and trying to expose the flaws and biases in autism research. Morton Gernsbacher is one example. Go to her website and look up her stuff, it's excellent.
Wow, thanks for the info on Morton Ann Gernsbacher. I like her research and her way of thinking.
But how much of that is NT based, on how much is due to the fact that her son has Autism. She is one of the few enlightened one's, but it just shows that the only people who do try to understand things are the few that are affected either themselves or by a family member. It still proves, that most people just don't care, or only want to know how to "cure it", not understand it.
But we need no memoir book, but FAQ about Aspie way of thinking.
There's big difference between Memoirs of a Geisha and (unexisting) Geisha World Guide.
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Well, there's the bllindingy obvious one:
"I've heard that Aspies have no empathy. Does this mean that they don't give a damn about anybody but themselves?"
I'm not NT, so I don't know all their questions. But I think that could be:
- Do Aspies feel sth?
- Are they asexual?
- What they think about NTs?
- If Aspie looks at the wall, does they see sth there?
- Why Aspies are unconscious, away-from-the-world?
- Are Aspies savants?
- Can they enjoy Art?
- Can they enjoy or smile?
- What is glass wall?
- Why they like to have a plan?
- Are all Aspies good in Math?
- Are they a little deaf?
etc.
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Change Your Frequency, when you're talking to me!
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Das gehört verboten! http://tinyurl.com/toobigtoosmall size does matter after all
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My reply would be:
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
- It depends on the aspie.
1. Do Aspies have any feelings?
2. If Aspie stares at the wall and seems to be off, does s/he see on this wall sth that other people can't see?
F.e.
I am off, somebody comes, looks at me, looks at the same point as me... and asks
- Is there sth special?
- No
- Do you see sth there?
- I don't have hallucinations
- So why you stare at this wall?
- It is
- ?
- I don't care about it, I'm off
MyFutureSelfnMe - yes, it depends. But people think that Aspies feel nothing, it's not true. We only can't express or realise. Some Aspies are asexual, but it's not true that all are. Some already don't know they feel sth. Some parents think that their Aspie child will never want to have bf/gf, because "Aspies are asexual". Somobody has to tell them they're wrong.
People thinking that pictures in head are halluciantions, are also wrong and have to be realised it's way of thinking.
Etc. ![]()
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