Sensory issues: Pain or Fear?
That describes my experience pretty well, although I don't pace, I start curling up and rocking or shaking. And it is sometimes very difficult to talk, even to write or send a single-word text message.
I usually describe that 'extreme unpleasantness' to people as, "Imagine you are feeling nauseous, but the nausea is not in your stomach but in your head." Meldowns have sometimes made me picture that some mad professor is injecting bovine semen into my brain using a huge cattle syringe, and I can do nothing to stop him.
I thought that my extreme aversion and avoidance would be classified as 'fear' even though I don't get 'frightened' in the same way as when someone wants to mug me. I didn't really know the meaning of the word 'anxiety' in relation to myself until my psychiatrist and psychologist explained to me that I was anxious.
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When I must wait in a queue, I dance. Classified as an aspie with ADHD on 31 March 2009 at the age of 43.
MONKEY
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They make me irritable and ratty, like if I'm wearing a top that's too tight I will be in a mad mood and I would be very irritated and would have to adjust my clothes all the time. Years ago it would escalate into rage or anger but not so much nowadays.
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poopylungstuffing
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No, not for me. My reaction to a sensory overload assault is: (1.) make it stop; and (2.) get it away from me / get me away from it. That's it.
It is pretty much part of my job that I am subjected to sensory assault on a regular basis...and I am not always able to get away from it when I want to..I try to make accommodations for myself, like wearing noise cancelling ear phones AND ear plugs...and over the years...I have had one major nervous breakdown and several less significant meltdowns..but I have gotten somewhat used to it...but I still often have to get away from it,,,,in fact, that is what I am doing right now....is hiding in the back because there is too much going on and i feel completely overwhelmed....
But I can't stay back here all night.......
I guess....fear more than pain...but there is an element of pain to it.....Riding in cars causes me a lot of fear....the sensory overload caused by loud music is more akin to pain...but it is more of a mental pain than a physical pain......a deep stress feeling....but i guess there is an element of fear to it too I guess...
right now i am crying at the prospect of having to go back out there...so...i guess i would be experiencing fear...I have had a very difficult and overwhelming night..and the chaos will not cease...but I am obligated to go back out into the fray...it is my job....
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"Ifthefoolwouldpersistinhisfolly,hewouldbecomewise"
I'm starting to think I'm a half-aspie hybrid.
I wan't always this sensitive either. I think, though, that until I knew I was autistic -- and until I found out that autism comes with sensory problems some months later -- I was also not aware that there was something like sensory overload, and that that was what I was experiencing. I could not explain my behaviour -- meltdowns and emotional exhaustion -- but I tended to ascribe these to relationship problems or things with which I disagreed. I just didn't know why these occasional outbursts were so disproportionately extreme. They didn't happen very often back then, only once every few months.
I started seeking help for this in 2006 because it was destroying my relationship with my closest friend, and a psychologist and doctor didn't help at all. I asked to be tested for blood sugar and all sorts of physical things after the psychologist proved unhelpful. When I went back to the doctor because of an unusually heavy bout of flu, I told him that I had found the answer to the mystery of my extraordinary temper, viz. that I am autistic and have ADHD.
Annemarie Lombard (the psychologist who wrote Sensory Intelligence) has done a workplace consultation which has helped a lot, because my colleagues and I are now aware of each other's struggles, and accommodations are being made for me (including a sound-proof work area). I also have more respect to the boss's extreme sensitivity to stinky smells (smells which don't bother me much).
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When I must wait in a queue, I dance. Classified as an aspie with ADHD on 31 March 2009 at the age of 43.
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But I can't stay back here all night.......
I guess....fear more than pain...but there is an element of pain to it.....Riding in cars causes me a lot of fear....the sensory overload caused by loud music is more akin to pain...but it is more of a mental pain than a physical pain......a deep stress feeling....but i guess there is an element of fear to it too I guess...
right now i am crying at the prospect of having to go back out there...so...i guess i would be experiencing fear...I have had a very difficult and overwhelming night..and the chaos will not cease...but I am obligated to go back out into the fray...it is my job....
I read that at work this morning and you have been on my mind all day. I can understand why you would have had a nervous breakdown. I know that giving up your job is probably not an option; and I can see that you have tried many coping strategies, but if you'd like some more, please say so so that we can all share some more with you. I know what this feels like and I would hate to know someone is going through this so regularly.
PS: Are you still regularly out as Puppetrina?
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When I must wait in a queue, I dance. Classified as an aspie with ADHD on 31 March 2009 at the age of 43.
Mostly it's pain. However, the pain certain things cause me - as well as the way that my sensory issues have been used against me by bullies and people who simply didn't care about how bad they hurt me - has led me to fear and avoid stimuli I find unpleasant, if not feel outright rage when I am subjected to something that hurts my senses.
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auntblabby
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So it is my opinion that certain PAINFUL and unbearable sounds to some people may cause them to react in a manner that makes observers believe they 'fear' the sound.
However, is there anyone who has a sensory issue that is actually SCARED of a noise, not merely that it is unbearably painful?
maybe i am missing your finer points of argument, but when i was a tot i was scared $#!+less of the sound the vacuum cleaner made, i would plug my ears and run away. my older brother liked to torture me [NT kids are so diabolically perceptive of other kids' weaknesses] by beeping the horn on the new toy car i got for my birthday, so much was i bothered by the awful noise that my parents assumed i was afraid of the car so they took it back to the store- god-damn it! that made me sore but i wasn't verbal at that point so i couldn't tell them the real reason i screamed. i wasn't afraid of the car but of the f*cking NOISE! but i am also unusually sensitive to discomfort/pain, i feel those things more than my siblings ever would demonstrate. especially bee stings which paralyze me with pain. and hypodermic needle pokes, i can feel the roughness of the metal needle as it is poked and shoved through my skin. i can't even stand the sight of a needle puncturing flesh.
That's almost exactly how it is for me. When I am overloaded, it affects all of my senses. Except that for me, it is fear. I fear noises that I hear. I don't fear the sun or bright lights, though they cause me immense uneasiness & distress. I hate them because of that, but I don't fear them. Noises, however, I do fear.
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?Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.? _Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss)
So it is my opinion that certain PAINFUL and unbearable sounds to some people may cause them to react in a manner that makes observers believe they 'fear' the sound.
However, is there anyone who has a sensory issue that is actually SCARED of a noise, not merely that it is unbearably painful?
maybe i am missing your finer points of argument, but when i was a tot i was scared $#!+less of the sound the vacuum cleaner made, i would plug my ears and run away. my older brother liked to torture me [NT kids are so diabolically perceptive of other kids' weaknesses] by beeping the horn on the new toy car i got for my birthday, so much was i bothered by the awful noise that my parents assumed i was afraid of the car so they took it back to the store- god-damn it! that made me sore but i wasn't verbal at that point so i couldn't tell them the real reason i screamed. i wasn't afraid of the car but of the f*cking NOISE! but i am also unusually sensitive to discomfort/pain, i feel those things more than my siblings ever would demonstrate. especially bee stings which paralyze me with pain. and hypodermic needle pokes, i can feel the roughness of the metal needle as it is poked and shoved through my skin. i can't even stand the sight of a needle puncturing flesh.
I am an adult & I'm still terrified of the noise vacuum cleaners make. I hate vacuuming, especially when I'm alone & I become very paranoid, anxious, & jumpy when I try.
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?Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.? _Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss)
Hmmm - well i guess i fear the pain - if someone says i'm going to turn the dishwasher/vacuum/some other noisy gadget on i feel fear - a fear of the pain to come - what i feel once its on though is more of a physical pain - like someone scraping away at my brain with a needle...
If theres no warning theres no fear though - just a need to get away from the pain - like never remembering to take the darn labels off new tops (why do they put those blimmin things there?) - i dont fear new clothes - or even think about it until the label causes me irritation and pain and i have to get rid of it...
poopylungstuffing
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But I can't stay back here all night.......
I guess....fear more than pain...but there is an element of pain to it.....Riding in cars causes me a lot of fear....the sensory overload caused by loud music is more akin to pain...but it is more of a mental pain than a physical pain......a deep stress feeling....but i guess there is an element of fear to it too I guess...
right now i am crying at the prospect of having to go back out there...so...i guess i would be experiencing fear...I have had a very difficult and overwhelming night..and the chaos will not cease...but I am obligated to go back out into the fray...it is my job....
I read that at work this morning and you have been on my mind all day. I can understand why you would have had a nervous breakdown. I know that giving up your job is probably not an option; and I can see that you have tried many coping strategies, but if you'd like some more, please say so so that we can all share some more with you. I know what this feels like and I would hate to know someone is going through this so regularly.
PS: Are you still regularly out as Puppetrina?
Yeah..I frequently have Puppetrina around. I am planning to take her to Las Vegas (I leave tomorrow for 2 days)
I perish the thought of leaving her behind..though I really could if I wanted to...but it is very hard to resist....My friend and I are both worried that Puppetrina might have a hard time getting through customs and that they might try to dismantle her...
I have not been on planes very often, so I don't really know what to expect....and I am kind of worried....I am probably off to the haven right now to discuss some things.
Accommodations have been made for me...I have my own room...I get breaks from working the bar whenever I can....stuff like that...
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http://www.youtube.com/user/MsPuppetrina
http://www.youtube.com/poopylungstuffing
http://www.superhappyfunland.com
"Ifthefoolwouldpersistinhisfolly,hewouldbecomewise"
As I grow older, my ability to tolerate extreme pain builds. I had my wisdom teeth out with a local and was up and about as soon as I left the dental office. I've cut myself by accident and would never notice until the room looked like a crime scene. But heaven forbid a blade of grass brush up against me or someone try and hug me. Those are painful. I think fear of the unknown is what holds me back the most.
