AS and toughening up in your 20s

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It's not smart to quit a job and then go find another. It's smart to find a new job and then quit your old one.

I will likely never 'toughen up' because I am a tender soul: imagine the juiciest steak which is so tough and brown and manly and sizzling hot on the outside, yet inside is as pink and soft as a baby's skin ... that's me; I am fundamentally pink and soft, or 'sensitive' as my grandmother calls me.

Goddamnit where did this garbage come out from. I have this to say. For the OP and all the "tough love FTW we must kick people in their a**holes" mentality >_<



And some other things:

Most people don't care. Also if they talk s**t about you directly, you point it out to them, make them look like hipocrites, etc. Mess their arguments away. I don't care about how other people react.



You mean not being a complete jackass to people? LOL. I didn't know you could complain about an AUTISM SUPPORT SITE "coddling" people?



What about those people who don't give a s**t about garbage neurotypical rules and do fine by themselves, or break away without resulting in PUA-type insanity? I find that funny that you go "hur hurr become neurotypical and ovecome your autism" - or IMPLY it in your posts.



So you admit that your situation is not everyone's situations, and you want to force normalcy on other people. You want the autistic nation to surrender to neurotypical society. Come on, you sound like one of those PUA artists who go on and on about this sort of mentality.



Yes. This is an autism support forum. Not a forum for people to attempt to be neurotypical and diss those who will not surrender to neurotypical culture.



So? Neurotypicals do the same thing, only they managed to maintain a majority in their society. That simply shows for those more autistic to beware of neurotypical societied.



Yes it is. The hikkimori would love to show/point out to you otherwise.



Justifying trolling and flaming? LOL. That's seriously an attempt to justify trolling aupport forums. If you don't want to hear the "whining" - then don't go on that sub-forum. Don't instead go and troll people as you seem to be justifying and then fallimng back on "toughen up" or "man the f**k up" mentality on an INTERNET FORUM DEDICATED TO SUPPORT. We are not /b/



Yes. The rules the neurotypicals use tend to be illogical and dated on archaic traditions. There have been eras of change and destruction of the old order, but then a new order replaces it that is just as illogical and based in annoying socialising garbage.

Now if you are going to deny that and attempt to go onwards and ally with the neurotypicals, as the rest of your post implies...



That's not exactly using NT rules of dating, nor selling out



By using the internet, something that IS NOT exactly neurotypical. Even in this era where the normals have invaded the internet wih Web 2.0

I toughen up by cutting myself and punching trees. It seems to work.

Is there some kind of internet equivalent to the high five?
Because I would like to give Warsie one, if he wants to.

Me too.


I toughened up by means of this sentence, said to myself whenever I got into "Poor little me, why must I suffer so?" mode:

"Get over yourself; what makes you so special that you should never suffer?"

It works.

whoamI: that's one of the noble truths of buddhism, i.e everybody suffers.

apparently this insight both reduces one's own suffering and increases empathy for others

There are choices besides either wallowing in self-pity or functioning in ways that lots of autistic people will never manage while attacking people who can't.

And I've found that simply dispassionately describing one's difficulties with "basic" tasks is enough to get accused of doing the first thong by people doing the second thing on this site sometimes.

Warsie, you can play the misunderstood Aspie card all you want, but it isn't going to get you anywhere in life besides having a bitter AS vs. NT mentality.

Nowhere I did I say to pretend to be NT. I said to change what can be changed. I think people use AS an excuse, "Oh I have AS so dating is difficult for me" even though they've never tried.

As for the job thing...I'd like to wear Armani suits, but I live without it for the time being. I'd rather be a professional, struggling musician (which I am) than have a job I hate and make more money.

Impossible.
You do not know if you would like to wear Armani suits because you have never worn them.
Unless you are one of those people who sees clothes as status symbols.
But if they are really uncomfortable, you can wear convenient clothes underneath, although you would put on a false image for everyone, you seem to be wearing the suit, but underneath you are still wearing convenient clothes.

Metaphor?

I'm not out to impress anyone. If I were, I'd be listening to Miley Cyrus and wearing Abercrombie. Some people just happen to like to dress sharply.

I know it is. I worked it out and noticed its effects before I read anything about Buddhism.

So your saying you'll never have a 9-5.....that sux!

it's like my mother says never leave a job until you have another one to go to.

I have AS and have never dated or tried to date.
the reason is simple
I don't want to.
it holds no appeal for me.

8-7 would work equally well.

I agree with the entire statement, but if you are really that close to the edge, it is in your best interest not to rely on an internet site like WP with more-or-less anonymous people to keep your life held together. You'd be infinitely better off getting some professional help face-to-face, or consulting somebody who knows you personally to actually help you with the nitty-gritty details that are required to step away from that edge.