How do you feel about yourself?

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I didn't read all the responses so bear with me (on my way to bed)....

But I wanted to say very quickly that I think it's pretty normal for ppl with AS to feel this way....I think it's hard for us to masquerade to everyone else and act as they're expecting us to....NTs expect us to have a certain amount of self-confidence, etc and once we get home and we're away from them the mask comes off and we realize that some of the qualities that we're portraying aren't there, or are there but are weak.

So maybe that's what causes some of the feelings of self loathing? I'm newly diagnosed so I can only speculate. But I figured I'd share my thoughts in this, just in case they could help in anyway.

FTR, I don't experience it very much at all. I've just come to accept that I have different strengths and weaknesses than NTs, and that's okay. Now that I know what's causing me to be different, I understand and am more forgiving toward myself...


...desperately need sleep.... lol

Night!

^Addendum ^
How do I feel about myself?
I would like to be able to relate to people on a non-complex level, and enjoy something on simple level without analyzing , to take something at face value without thinking a lot.
I'm in a locked-loop and have been this way since 5.
I feel good when I can help someone out when there is need , and have abilities to do so whether practical skill or knowledge is concerned.
I always think I never know it enough and if I cant explain it, then I don't know it well enough ;though people have said I'm a man of many abilities, it is never good enough.

This is a drive that cannot be satisfied.

I feel really good about myself. I've changed to suit myself, and found a propper role model, last September. I've done my 360 and I'm not going back to my angry days of 2007-2009.

I do not feel particularly good about myself...There are brief times when I can take a break and actually feel "good"...but it takes effort...or there are few things that can actually bring that about for me. I am stressed and not happy with my abilities to control the perpetual chaos around me. I am not happy with my physical appearance and I despise the way that my brain works....I hate hate hate....going in perpetual circles every day just to get the bare minimum accomplished. Any time I lash out at anyone, I am really lashing out at myself, and I feel very shameful about the lack of self-control that leads to my lashing out in the first place.
I am troubled by my inability to produce anything marketable from my so-called talents...I am frustrated by the fact that I alienate everybody and the effort to not do this seems beyond my grasp...all kindsa stuff...makes me not like myself so very much.

I feel fine about me, I just don't belong on this planet. I would love to find my species and have the feeling of 'coming home' to somewhere I belong. Being reminded on a daily basis that I am 'weird' wears me down. But I know I am a good person, because I try not to hurt people and I don't wish bad things on people and I am happy when good things happen to people. I live and let live and don't play games and try not to cause people pain, and I try to help animals. None of that counts for anything on earth though, and you can be the nicest person in the world and die in the gutter with people walking right over top of you, on this plane anyway. I think I have resentment and sadness about that. But other than that I like me, I just wish I fit in better.

I tend to blame society for some or lots of my problems because people hate individuality. I'm kind of misanthropic but I also blame myself at times because I can not be like everyone else. I think if I was less caring & more of a jerk instead; things in my life would be much easier for me. But I also think that I am a better person because of the way I am. I know this sounds kind of confusing but I'm not sure how to explain it. I have lots of contradictory feelings about myself

I feel good about myself and I am always thinking about how to improve things that I find difficult. I realize that most my problems are because of other people. I have never been able to comprehend why people put themselves down or have issues with themselves. It doesnt make any sense and is completely illogical. Dont ever let people put you down because their just full of a bunch of crap. F**k people who say negative things about you. Everyone should know their own greatness. Think of it this way, its not you thats the problem. Its the world thats undeserving of you.

I also wanted to state that people with confidence issues usually come from having overly critical parents or being made fun of in school. If you think logically you should know that this isnt a problem with yourself. Its a problem with them. If you find your self being sensitive then you need to get rid of these people. If your insensitive then you should be immune to it and not listen to these people. I would probablly make a bad councler because I would tell people to just get over it but Ive realized some people have a hard time with this. Most people who are overly critical of others have serious problems with themselves. Its unfortinate that some people have to grow up with this stuff. I have known people with ptsd and it seems worse to me than having any other mental disorder. I have been unable to comprehend what its like though because I cant understand someone not realizing that their problem is not them but other people. Feelings such as guilt and shame are very unnecessary unless you did something like accedently kill a kitten and even if it was an accedent it wasnt your fault so your not really guilty. Sometimes s**t just happens and it happens to everyone. If you did it on purpose its because you meant to do it so why did you do it if you thought you would regret it?

i like my existence and wish to maintain it

I used to have a lot of issues like that, I remember when I finally got mad at myself for being mad at myself, and burst out laughing at the irony of it all.

Then when I started getting further into math and science, I realized life is far too beautiful to go around being depressed all the time, I think my brain broke at some point too.


Anyone else ever laughed at a tree?