Would you be social if you could?

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Second that......

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Probably I'd be. But who knows? It's like a question what if I was Japanese man. I don't know. I've never been.

My sentiments almost exactly.

I don't know. I feel like it's part of my personality to be a loner, so maybe I would still choose to be alone even if I could socialize. I just can't fathom what it would be like to be able to socialize without getting exhausted and overwhelmed.

I am social in situations where it's needed. I prefer to be alone and rarely crave companionship.

Because I am NT the psychologist called it avoidant personality disorder. I call it not being a sheep.
If someone doesn't want to be social just let him.

In about half an hour I'll have to go to institute again for like 7 hours, to assist activities for mentally handicapped people.
I'd rather not do it. I mean I like the people and stuff but it's just that everyone so cheerful and I'm mostly quiet. People start asking why and blablabla.
Just go laugh and let me sit in peace, if I don't laugh it doesn't mean I'm sad. This costs me so much energy.

/rant

Most of the time, I can't find people I want to be around that much. I don't mind being social if I find someone I can 1. have an intelligent conversation with, or 2. have stomach wrenching laughs with. Fortunately I've spent some time with friends lately who I really, really enjoy being around. Usually I just can't find anyone I want to be around, and then it IS voluntary.

I can be social. I know there are social Aspies. I don't think I really socialize "normally", in fact, I know I don't but people either like the way I am or they don't. I don't want to waste anyone's time by pretending to be something I'm not. Would I socialize more like an NT if I could? Not really. I mean, it'd be nice to have no social anxiety and not have to use a facade(I feel anxious and freakish otherwise) but then I just wouldn't be the same person. I can't really imagine how it'd be. I suppose I could be like I am now and just have no social fears or anxiety...IDK...I really don't feel strongly either way.

Nope. I like my solitude, thanks.

I fancy myself a loner by nature, too. But, I find that, these days, I can get along with people I meet fairly well... I've a couple of colleagues I'm quite fond of, though I don't meet them outside of work (by my own choice). Two years ago, when I first joined this forum, it was different. My social circle was pretty much limited to my cat and me, and I liked that just fine. If I could go back to that, I would not mind, really. But it's comforting to know that I can be social if I want to and if I try, and I consider it a possibility that I may start friendships in the future, once I feel a bit better about myself than I do now.

So, to sum it up, being (more or less) a bit isolated socially is my own choice, and I'm currently as social as I can be comfortable with.

Same. I try to be social and try to have people around, though not too many at a time. But sometimes I just want to be alone.

On a scale of 10 (where 0 is the total loner and 10 is the party-face) I'm usually able to get a score of about 6, but can't really stay that high for too long. I actually want to be more social, but after a while it frustrates me, so I return to a state of about 2, which is quite comfortable for me.

There are two types of Aspies : introverted Aspies and extraverted Aspies. Introverted Aspies are most common and tend to avoid social interaction because it scares them. Extraverted Aspies are less common. While they actually tend to actively seek and engage in social interaction, they are often rejected either immediately or in the long run because they are too intense. They tend to talk too much, talk too loud and make numerous social errors (like offending or ignoring people without realising it).

I belong to the category of extraverted Aspies myself. While there are definitely some downsides to it, I'm glad I'm extraverted and not introverted because it forced me to engage in social interaction quite a lot and this has given me the oportunity to learn quite a lot about human interaction through trial-and-error. In the long run, this helps me quite a lot in daily life to meet new people and maintain my friendships.

Interesting... because if I'm in a bigger group (where big means anything larger or equal than 2 ppl plus me), I'm totally extroverted (ruling the conversations, having fun, etc), until I reach my limits, then suddenly I turn introverted. If I'm with only one other person, I'm only introverted.

I am very much this way. I've always called myself an extraverted introvert. I suppose I force most of the extraversion, partially because I feel like it makes life easier but also because I really do enjoy socializing, I just have a ton of anxiety about it and it doesn't come naturally.

I have a few different modes, I am extremely introverted in public, I don't talk unless it's absolutely necessary and I avoid people and eye contact like the plague. I am more extraverted around casual acquaintances, I know some of these people wouldn't even believe that I am an introvert the rest of the time, and like you said, very introverted when I am with only one other person. I always let them take the dominant role.

I have to be EXTREMELY comfortable with someone to be extraverted without forcing it...but I am very extraverted in small groups. It can be fun but it takes a lot of me. I really put on the whole dog and pony show. I actually think this may have something to do with me being extra careful to make a good impression lest the other people in the group should get to talking and decide they would be better of without me xD.

Middle school is still affecting me to this day xD.

It's interesting to read about these mixtures. I've known for quite a while that some Aspies are introverted and some are extraverted but I wasn't aware that some are introverted on some occasions and extraverted on other occasions. I'm extraverted in pretty much any occasion, although I can get extremely nervous or even shut down completely if I try to communicate with a woman I find appealing but haven't ever spoken with and haven't been introduced to. I also tend to avoid talking to random strangers unless I have a reason to, however if I get into a conversation with a stranger I'm no less extraverted than in other occasions.

yes that is so true.. but it doesnt stop me wishing they werent like that and hoping to meet someone who isnt like that...so i try and try (and always end up hurt in the process) (Im 39yrs so not everyone "outgrows' this)