Making Comparisons - Me to "Extreme" Aspies

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Aren't hikikomori limited to Japan though, or am I being incredibly dense? Either way, it's very likely that hikikomori and aspies are one and the same, but cultural differences make them appear more different than they really are.

As for me, I'm somewhere in the middle. I don't have a number of symptoms associated with AS, or if I do have them, they're very mild indeed. Examples: eye contact, understanding nonliteral language and sarcasm, severe sensory issues (mine are mild in comparison)

My greatest problems are to do with socialising and organising things. I have a serious problem approaching and making conversation with strangers. Hell, I even find it hard to know what to say to friends sometimes. I am a crap conversationalist because I usually can think of little or nothing to say. I also don't know how to make or maintain friendships. It seems that I have a natural gift of upsetting or annoying potential friends, which sucks because I do desire friendships.

That said, I can perhaps appear more 'normal' than some other Aspies, but it's all just an act. Not many people have seen the real me which is a shame because I prefer the real me to the fake me. I'm funnier when I'm just being myself.

Oh, I've gotten around that by being the real me in relationships. It actually means fewer instances of foot-in-mouth (but more instances of "okay, Dandelion, that's enough of that, you're scaring everyone").

Yeah, they're supposed to be limited to Japan, but I question whether they're just less documented here, or are reacted to differently in such a way that they're more likely to come out of their rooms.

Maybe research could be done into the matter of whether they're actually Aspies.

Say you get turned down for the DLA, because you look "too normal." You try to keep working but it all goes to hell and you can't cope. And then you end up on the street. And then you get pneumonia, and then you die.

Meanwhile, the lady's nephew gets DLA with no problems because he "looks obviously really 'messed up'" and continues to live comfortably and happily with his family (or where ever).

(I'm of course just making all this this up: I'm not trying to say that people who are 'obviously' severely impaired always get what they need, either.)

So, who had it harder? I think what's more important than how impressively impaired someone is (or looks, in a superficial sense) is the gap between what someone needs and what they get. If his needs are met, I say, no guilt. You also have no idea whether or not he's happy -- I hear that severity of impairment doesn't directly correlate with happiness at all. So he might be doing fine and be loving life.

OTOH, you can leave the house, but are (maybe, I don't know) at risk for homelessness. I don't see that as a clear case of, "you have it better."

People do seem impressed by impairments in ways that don't always seem to make sense. If you can leave the house, then it's assumed that you're fine and you need no help at all. Even if you can't keep yourself fed or keep the heating bill paid so you end up starving and freezing. Or maybe drinking oneself to death, for that matter.

OTOH, if you use an AAC device, then you're 'obviously' severely, severely impaired (and probably ret*d, too). (And I'm not trying to say that people with more obvious impairments always get what they need, either, BTW.)

Again, people getting what they need seems more important than how 'impressive' their impairment is.

Another important thing to remember, is that just because somebody rambles on about their obsessions, doesn't mean that they're lower functioning, than the rest of the members, who are posting.

Yeah, since I went to school & am working, a lot of people don't even realize I am on the spectrum, but I am. I've learned a lot of coping mechanisms. One thing I've realized is not to compare myself (even though it's tempting, and my logical thinking wants to know where exactly I fall on the spectrum so I know what outlook I have - though that could just me my grad student side). If someone isn't familiar with Autism/Aspgerger's they will think only of the extreme cases they've seen & not realize it's a spectrum, therefore, they will have expectations. Knowing that I have my own path to walk down helps me not worry about running into problems with people's expectations of what a person on the spectrum should be or needs. Hope this helps!